


The Eye of the Storm

by Themillenniumpeacock



Series: Waiting for the Storm [3]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-08
Updated: 2018-09-14
Packaged: 2019-01-31 01:13:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 49,588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12665256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Themillenniumpeacock/pseuds/Themillenniumpeacock
Summary: Finn rushed into his room, panting hard-why does it always seem like I’m trying to catch my breath? It had taken him weeks to get used to sleeping alone, and today was the first day he was truly grateful for the privacy. Any roommate would think he was having some sort of meltdown with the state he was in. Hell, he thought, maybe I am having a meltdown.I’m not ready to make this decision yet. I don’t know what I want.********This is the third part of a series centered around Poe Dameron Ben Solo/Kylo Ren and Finn, with this part from the view point of Finn. Taking place after the events in The Force Awakens, Finn finds he must make tough decisions that he is still unsure of. Should he stay with the Resistance? Should he leave and avoid a life of fighting?But he also has another problem: can he leave his friend Poe, whom he notices is also guarding a secret of his own, and who Finn is becoming more attached and Finn can’t quite explain to himself why.***Sorry I’m terrible at summaries, this is my (mainly) stormpilot fic that I’ve been waiting ages to finally write! I highly recommend readin part on and two of this series first, but it isn’t 10000% necessary.Hope you enjoy :3





	1. Chapter 1

As she gazed out of the viewport into the endless sea of stars, she saw everything and nothing at once, her face unreadable. Her failure and embarrassment at the hands of the traitor still burned white hot in her mind. She didn't claw her way to the top only to be pulled down by that insubordinate pup.

Phasma sighed quietly to herself, flexing her fingers out from the fists she had unconsciously made. This would not be the end of her. As she replaced her chrome helmet on her head she whispered to herself, “I will have my revenge, FN-2187…”

***

Finn rushed into his room, panting hard- _why does it always seem like I’m trying to catch my breath?_ It had taken him weeks to get used to sleeping alone, and today was the first day he was truly grateful for the privacy. Any roommate would think he was having some sort of meltdown with the state he was in. _Hell_ , he thought, _maybe I am having a meltdown._

_I’m not ready to make this decision yet. I don’t know what I want._

He stood with his back against his closed door, head rolled back and staring at the metallic ceiling. How had his day turned around this unpredictably?

It had started like any other day in the base, with rehab and a doctor visit. After his fight with Ren, his spine had been severely damaged. It was a constant battle to regain his strength and his ability to move, even with the biotic implant in his back. He had been determined to get back to top shape, and had impressed the doctors and the rest of the Resistance with his quick recovery.

After a routine series of tests, he had been surprised by the head Resistance doctor that he was finally released from their watch and he was free to do as he pleased. He was free!

He immediately went to tell Poe, whom he knew could use the good news. Finn didn’t know what was going on with his friend, but recently there had been a shift within the pilot. Him and Finn would be joking and laughing, then out of nowhere a sudden sadness would cloud the pilot’s eyes. No matter how much he tried to cover it with a forced smile and insisting that Finn was imagining things, he knew something was troubling his friend.

Poe was elated at Finn’s progress, clapping him on the back and pulling him in for a fierce hug. Finn squeezed him back, needing the relief and comfort that he only seemed to get from the pilot’s contact. Finn realized he must’ve held onto his friend for a moment too long as Poe awkwardly pulled away from him, cheeks flushed and avoiding Finn’s eyes.

Finn quickly swallowed the unexpected hurt that was rising within him at Poe’s actions. He didn’t know why but recently everything the pilot did or didn’t do was affecting more that it should. Poe quickly broke the tension by suggested that they start heading down to their sparring training, and with a joke about Finn kicking his ass again, he immediately lightened the mood between them.

The sparring was something that Finn had actually initiated and had become quite proud of. After waking from his coma and beginning to recover, he soon learned that the Resistance lacked real soldiers that could fight head to head with Stormtroopers. He suggested to General Organa that someone should teach the Resistance members how to fight, because without the support of the new Republic, the Resistance would soon be overwhelmed when going up against the First Order. Not every battle could be fought with Starships. They would need people on the ground fighting the enemy.

To his surprise, the General had put him in charge of the training. He was hesitant to teach at first, afraid that no one would want to learn from him, an ex-stormtrooper and a traitor. He was sure that after telling Poe his fears that he had personally roundup a number of recruits, but with every class more and more members of the Resistance came to train with Finn. He had become proud of the progress most of them had made and felt that with some refinement and continued practice, they’d have a small force of ground troops that could really challenge the First Order.

But Finn and Poe never made it to the class that day.

While traveling through the metal-lined hallways of their new base, which ironically was an abandoned First Order base that the Resistance had taken over to hide out in, General Organa had summoned the both of them to her private command center. Worried that the First Order had possibly discovered their location and were planning to attack, the two rushed over to see what was needed of them.

The General had taken over what used to be a private First Order command center. The room had high vaulted ceiling, lined with metals colored in various shades of silver and black. A shiver always ran down Finn’s spine when he entered the room, he could all too easily see Hux commanding his forces in the very spot that Leia now stood.

Finn was confused when the General greeted them with a casual smile and congratulated Finn on his full recovery. This couldn’t be the only reason why she had summoned the two of them to meet with her privately.

And it wasn’t.

The General wasted no time and began to tell the two of how reports were coming in that Finn’s defiance and departure from the First Order had begun to inspire others. Leia wanted to use this uncertainty that had arisen within the enemy’s ranks to the Resistance's advantage immediately. She had come up with a plan to have Finn record messages to be sent through the First Order communications systems, encouraging others to rebel like he had. She believe that hearing from him directly about his success would be the perfect inspiration to start an uprising.

During the explanation of her plan, Finn felt his insides freeze. He hadn’t realized that being cleared from the doctor would also mean he would be ready for duty. He thought he still had a chance to choose whether to fight or not...

After Leia had finished explaining the need for secrecy, as Finn, Poe and herself would be leaving that very night without telling anyone until after they had successfully arrived on Coruscant, Finn could only nod that he understood the plan as Poe excitedly told the General that he was more than ready to protect the both of them.

After telling them when and where to meet her that night, Finn mind was a swirl of chaos. He quickly left Poe with the excuse of needing to pack and made his way back to his room so he didn’t have a panic attack in front of the pilot whose respect he needed so much.

He now stood in his room, hands on the back of his chair trying to calm himself. He didn’t think he wanted to join the Resistance. He didn’t want to fight for a cause he didn’t know if he believed in. He didn’t want to be another nameless soldier sent in to fight and kill and die for someone else. But where would he go if he didn’t stay here?

He often daydreamed of running off to some outter rim system. He had no idea what he would do to support himself, but he always seemed to be joined by Poe in these imaginings. Just the two of them going on some crazy adventure, Poe getting them into trouble and Finn finding a way out of it.

Finn sighed. Deep down he knew he could never bring himself to ask Poe to leave with him. Poe was the most dedicated member of the Resistance, possibly even more motivated than the General herself. This fight was his life, and while Finn hadn’t asked him the reasoning behind his passion, he knew that Poe would never turn his back on this war.

But the thought of leaving Poe for a life lived alone hurt Finn more than he thought he would. He hadn’t known that true friendship came with such deep connections to one another... 

Finn turned and regarded the old leather jacket that always hung next to the door, ready for him to grab at a moment's notice. It was his most prized possession, the jacket that Poe had given him. He remembered how his chest seemed about to burst when after waking up from his coma, Poe had visited him in the med-station and presented him with the jacket folded up very carefully. As Finn ran his fingers down the lone of heavy stitches, Poe had been blushing as he tried to tell Finn that he did his best to fix the jacket, not wanting Kylo Ren of all people to have ruined it beyond repair, but that Finn wasn’t obligated to wear it if he thought it was too sloppy done. Finn had embraced the pilot tightly, hiding the tears that had formed in his eyes at the thought and care the pilot had put into repair the jacket just for him. Finn had never been given such a special gift.

Finn did continue to wear that jacket nearly every day, proud of the scars on it that matched the ones on his body from his fight with Ren, and proud of the work that Poe put in to fix it, and to help fix him as well.

Still looking at the jacket, Finn decided that he would talk to Poe about what he should do. Poe would not judge him, and Finn knew that he would always be honest with him.

He began to pack a small rucksack with his clothes. With any decision he made tonight, he figured he would still be leaving the base. He might as well be prepared.

Before leaving he put on the leather jacket, finding comfort in the worn leather and perfect fit. He threw his rucksack over his shoulder and left his room with one last glance, wondering if he’d return to it after this.

He slowly began making his way to Poe’s room, engrossed in his thoughts. He was lucky that he spent so much time in his room, the hallways were empty so he didn’t have to worry about running into anyone while distracted.

As he turned a corner, the previously silent halls were now echoing someone’s voice. As Finn continued, he soon recognized the voices as none other than Poe, softly singing presumably to himself. Soon enough, Finn was proven right as the pilot’s turned the corner, his hands in the pockets of his orange jumpsuit, looking carefree and somehow perfect despite the many grease stains and splashes of oil that dotted his outfit. Finn shook his head. Poe was always effortlessly dashing, and Finn wished he knew the pilot’s secret to pulling off any look.

 _Not that I need to tell him that,_ he though as he made his way to the pilot. _His ego is big enough as it is._

Rolling next to the pilot was his ever present Droid, BB-8, who must’ve alerted him to Finn’s presence. He watched as Poe stopped singing abruptly when the droid interrupted him with a series of beeps. Poe looked down at the droid then snapped his head up to look down the hall where Finn was heading towards him. The pilot’s look of surprise was replaced with a wide grin and a laugh that was heard by Finn, it’s echos easily carried in the metallic halls.

“Hey buddy, what’re ya doing here?” Poe ask once they got close enough to each other. “I’m not late for the mission, am I?”

“No no, nothing like that,” Finn assured him. “I, uh, just finished packing early is all. Figured I’d come by and see what you were up to.”

Poe put a hand on Finn’s shoulder as they walked to his room, “Gotta change then pack myself, but I’ll welcome the company.”

They soon approached Poe’s room and entered, and Finn had to stop himself from making a face. He had been in the pilot’s room only once before, and it was still as untidy and unorganized as it had been then. Finn wasn’t one who lived in this kind of chaos. One of the habits he hadn’t broken since leaving the First Order was keeping his space organized and spotless. Poe quickly stepped ahead of Finn and grabbed a set of boots off the lone chair in the room.

“Sorry about the mess,” Poe said. “I haven’t had a chance to clean up since the last evac,”

“Poe, we’ve been here for months. And you haven’t been sent out on a mission in at _least_ three weeks,” Finn informed him, sitting down in the offered chair. He saw just a hint of pink appear in the man's cheeks.

“Like I said, I’ve had no time at all.” Poe stated back, trying not to laugh.

Finn shook his head and laughed softly at the pilot. “You are ridiculous, Poe.”

“You know, I think I’ve heard that about me before,” he replied. “But not nearly as ridiculous as you, the one who wants to spend time with me.”

Finn looked up at the pilot about to retort when he saw Poe was taking off his shirt. Poe was turned away from him, but Finn saw plenty of the pilot's muscles now flexing in his back. Poe casually threw the shirt into a corner of the room, and turned around as he reached for a clean one. Though he was sure that his dark skin would hide the fierce blush in his cheeks, Finn still looked down at his feet, but not before catching a glimpse of the pilot’s toned torso.

 _I’ve seen plenty of men without their shirts on in the Order_ , Finn thought to himself, _Poe is no different. Get yourself together before he notices!_

“Finn?”

He looked back up at the pilot, now standing in front of him, with a canvas backpack in one hand and what looked to be a mismatch of socks in the other. “Everything Alright?”

He froze for just a moment, thinking that Poe might’ve caught him gawking. He then remembered that everything wasn’t alright. He had come here with the intention asking Poe for advice, not be unexpectedly bashful because the pilot took his shirt off.

Sighing heavily he began, “I-I don’t know Poe. I’ve just been thinking about what role everyone wants me to play to here, and don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t know if I’m the right guy for the job…”

“Finn,” Poe began, kneeling down in front of him. “Listen, I’ve been there, questioning myself and wondering what good some kid like me could do, but you got this! I know can do anything-“

“Just stop,” Finn interrupted, now frustrated with himself for even bringing the subject up. “It’s not that I don’t think I can do it, I don’t know if I should do it.”

He looked into Poe’s concerned eyes, wanting that look of pity to leave. “Look, I’m not thinking of going back to the First Order or anything like that. I would never go back to them. But Poe, I-“ his voice caught in his throat,

“I’m responsible for all those stormtroopers deaths on Starkiller base, and I can’t just forget about that. it’s been eating me up inside everyday and every night. If it wasn’t for me and what I did, they’d be alive and I hate thinking that they were killed only so that I could save Rey… How selfish is that!? I honestly didn’t care about stopping the First Order as long as I knew you and her were safe!”

Finn could hear his voice steadily rising. He wanted to stop his rambling, but now that he had started he needed to get everything out. “I didn’t hate those that I killed on Starkiller Poe! But they're all dead now! Because of what I did! And I’m here, still alive, attempting to help, but I know that more are going to die-Because of everything I’m going to do! I didn’t want this life, I didn’t choose this fight! And yet here I am carrying out orders that I don’t know if I agree with!”  
  
Finn paused, breathing heavily. He hadn’t expected to let his thoughts blow up like that. He was looking down at his feet, unwilling to look at the disappointment that he knew must be on his friends face. He had only ever wanted Poe’s approval and trust, and now with his rant he was afraid it had escaped him.

Poe’s hands were then unexpectedly on Finn’s neck, placed with surprising gentleness. “Let’s go talk to the General. If we can’t come to a compromise, then I’ll make sure you’re not asked to do this.”

He lifted his eyes to meet the pilot’s, shocked that he wasn’t trying to convince him to do more.

“You don’t want me to help?” Finn slowly asked.

“I’ll always take your help,” one of Poe’s hands moved to the side of Finn’s face. “But only if you want to. Too many times I was given orders that didn’t sit right with me, and even though I knew I was on the good guys side, I never regret stopping and questioning those orders. That bit of rebellion is what got me here fighting for what I really believe in.”

“Can I ask,” Finn said hesitantly. “What is it that you are fighting for?”

Finn watched as a brief shadow of pain passed over the pilot’s face, but his soft smile was still there. His hand lingered on Finn’s face before Poe dropped his hands and sat on the floor in front of Finn.

“I’ll admit it’s a bit of a long story, and I promise I’ll tell it all to you someday,” Poe began, “but I can’t say there’s one specific thing that I fight for. My parents fought with the Rebel Alliance against the Empire, and I fight to help keep that peace that they nearly died for. That’s why I joined the New Republic’s Star Fleet after flight school. I soon learned that flying patrols for them wasn’t enough, and action against the growing evil in the galaxy needed to be taken. After...after someone I loved was killed by the First Order, I was given the opportunity by Leia herself to come and fight against them directly. I don’t fight for revenge, but I fight to try and prevent others from facing that same loss that I had. And then…”

Poe paused, his eyes turned away from Finn, unfocused and staring at nothing. When Poe spoke again, his voice was lower, and filled with a hurt and anger Finn hadn’t heard from the pilot before. “...then there’s _Kylo...”_ Poe’s lips seemed to wrap painfully around that name _,_  “...I keep fighting to try and stop him from becoming any worse than what he already is…”

Poe looked back at Finn, “I keep fighting because I want to change the galaxy, and I really believe that I can help, even just in some small way. I couldn’t live with myself if I walked away from what I know I can make better by being a part of it.”

They both sat there in silence, the only sound was BB-8 quietly humming to itself in the corner of the room as it charged on its base. A million thoughts seemed to run through Finn’s head. He could fight for those same things. He could probably even do some good in the end. _Am I ready to join this cause? To fight and possibly die for them?_

“Come on Finn,” Poe said quietly, interrupting his thoughts, “let’s go tell the General we need to rethink our plan.”

“Wait,” Finn said, grabbing the pilot’s hand and stopping him from standing. “Just, wait a second, Poe.”

Poe sat back down, Finn noticed that he kept glancing at their now intertwined hands. _Probably making him uncomfortable_ , Finn thought and he regretfully let Poe go.

Finn took a deep breath, “Finish your packing Poe. We’re going to Corascant. I’ll talk to the General on the way there and the two of us will figure out a way for me to help… I still don’t know where I’ll stand after that, but at least I know I can help with this.”

He looked up to see Poe grinning from ear to ear. In the back of his mind Finn knew he’d do anything to keep that smile on the pilot’s face. He wondered how he could be so dedicated to this person after such a short time knowing him.

“Hurry up Pilot, we got a schedule to keep!” Finn ordered, pointing to Poe’s discarded backpack. Poe nodded and quickly began stuffing his clothes into his bag. Finn couldn’t help but laugh at pilot’s haphazard packing and once again questioned how he got along so well with Poe who could be his opposite so much of the time.

Finn though happily to himself; _At least we’ll have this next adventure together._

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

Finn was leaning back in his seat with his eyes closed, vaguely listening to the argument coming from the cockpit of the small transport ship he was on. He could hear the annoyance in Poe’s voice over the intercom, and the General was sassing him with every retort. Finn smiled, he loved seeing how there were almost like mother and son with the way that they bickered sometimes. Although, Finn admitted to himself that he did side with Poe in this situation.

When the two of them met the General in The Resistances hangar, she was only accompanied by her protocol Droid, C3-po. when Poe asked who else they were waiting for, Leia had replied that it would just be the four of them. And Poe wasn’t very happy about that. Yes, 3po was more than capable of flying the ship, but what if they were attacked? Poe had given Finn a few flying lessons, but this transport only had the bare minimum when it came to offensive protection. Finn wasn’t nearly ready to get them out of a tight spot if they were confronted by the First Order.

Finn didn’t know whether to laugh or not at the General's response to Poe’s concerns.

“Are you not skilled enough to be able to protect this _one_ ship, Black Leader?” Leia had asked, not even trying to hide the smirk on her lips.

Poe didn’t have a response to that. He prided (and often bragged about) himself on being the Resistances best pilot, and he couldn’t exactly negate that. So after staring down the General and unable to come back with sassy remark himself, Poe just went “Fine. That’s fine. This is all fine. I’ll send over the proper Hyperspace coordinates.” And then he trying walking casually to his X-Wing, but Finn couldn’t help but laugh under his breath at how the pilot just about stomped away from them like he was about to throw a tantrum. It was too much to even try taking seriously.

It was only after they had made the jump to Hyperspace and Poe started worrying about keeping close track of them once they made it to the city planet of Coruscant that Finn began to worry that maybe they should have a larger escort with them. The General was considered the most wanted person by the First Order, and he had no doubt that they had spies on the planet. If they realized that she was there before Poe and Finn could get her to the relative safety of the New Republic Center Building, he wasn’t sure that they alone could protect her.

At this point in time though, Finn didn’t see the point in trying to argue with the General Like Poe was. They had already left the Resistance base, Finn had been given a blaster to use in case something arose, so he decided to take it easy on their journey and just wait until Poe had argued himself out over the comms.

Finn had nearly dozed off when muted footsteps approaching him surprised him awake. Leia had returned from the cockpit to sit across from him. He began feeling nervous again, knowing that this was the time for him to talk to the General about his concerns with this plan, and with possibly staying with the Resistance.

“I’m glad that we can have some time alone, Finn,” the General addressed him before he could began to gather his thoughts on what to say to her. “I suspected after your less than enthusiastic reaction to my plan that you might have some reservations about helping us with it.”

_Well, she read me easily enough._

“Yes, General,” Finn answered. “I’m concerned about a few things… It’s hard to explain exactly, but you see, I don’t want to be responsible for more deaths within the First Order, especially if it’s the loss of lives of others like me… the weight of what I help do on Starkiller is still too much at times...”

“Finn, I promise you I will always do everything I can to prevent the loss of life,” Leia leaned forward, speaking earnestly. “But, the reality of the situation is that this is war, and no one can completely prevent the deaths of others, no matter what actions we choose or don’t choose to take.”

“But it's not my war. It’s a war I don’t want to participate in anymore,” Finn whispered roughly. He hadn’t meant to be so blunt with the General, but it was too late to take back his words.

He looked at the General's reaction. she was surprisingly stone faced, and just regarding Finn with a questioning look. He felt uncomfortable with her unblinking gaze and he had to make himself sit still and not squirm under that look.

“I’m sorry to hear that, Finn,” the General finally said, breaking the tense silence. “You’re a good soldier, and an even better man. We will always be willing to use your help but I won’t make you do anything that doesn’t sit right with you.”

Finn frowned, now even more confused. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m glad no one's ordering me around to stay here but,” Finn shrugged, exasperated. “I thought someone would try and convince me to stick around!”

The General raised an eyebrow at that. “I’m not the first person you’ve told this to?”

“No, I told Poe earlier tonight too, about not being sure where I should be.”

She smiled at that, “I have to say I’m proud of Dameron, not trying to talk you into staying. He’s passionate to fault about this cause, and would normally argue with anyone about how this is the fight we should all be in.” She smiled coyly at him. “He must really like you.”

Now he was very confused. If he liked him so much why wouldn’t he ask him to stay? Now that he thought about it, it stung that there was a possibility that Poe didn’t want him to stay…

Finn did his best to dismiss the thought. This wasn’t a conversation about Poe, this was about where he fit into all this.

“General,” Finn said slowly, trying to put his feelings on the matter into words, “It’s not that I don’t sympathize with your cause, I just don’t want to be surrounded by death constantly. And I don’t want to be turned into a mindless killer like the First Order has done to all those Stormtroopers. I think I just want a bit of real freedom for once.”

Leia responded slowly, carefully choosing each word. “If all you really want is to run off to the outer rim and attempt to make a life out there, then I at least owe you enough to help you get there. But I will warn you that no matter where you run to, there will always be violence. There will always be some war around you. The outer rim territories are still mostly ruled by the Hutts who start a new war between families on a regular basis. Then of course, you’ll always be looking over your shoulder for the First Order to catch up to you. I would like nothing more on this galaxy Finn then go have you find peace after the violent life that you have been forced to live. But I can’t guarantee you a place where you’ll find that life where you won’t be constantly paranoid about who's coming after you. Not until this war is won.”

When Leia paused, Finn could see the genuine concern that she had for him. She really didn’t want him to have to fight anymore, but she was also wary of a future without her being able to protect him.

_No wonder she has such a loyal following,_ he thought _. She honestly cares about everyone who stands with her as if they were her own. Almost everyone in the Order talked about wanted a family like this to one degree or another… maybe we could use that..._

“I understand you reservations about carrying out my requests, Finn,” Leia said about to stand up. “And I will not be requiring you do them if you feel they’ll do more damage rather than good.”

“Actually General,” Finn said, a new idea beginning to take form. “I might not be completely opposed to your plan. I think there might be a way to help convince the troopers that they should leave the First Order!”

Leia sat back down, leaning in towards him, “Tell me what we should do, Finn.”

  
**********

When their ship flew down to the surface of Coruscant, Finn was in awe. He had heard about the famed planet that was completely covered by one huge city, but it was hard to really comprehend it until he saw it for himself. Brightly lit metallic buildings dominated the surface as far as he could see, with transport vehicles traveling in near perfect harmony in between them.

Their ship, closely followed by Poe’s X-Wing, soon landed inside a heavily guarded terminal. Leia had informed him that this was the home of the old senate building that was used in the days before the empire. Now it was being used again in the wake of the destruction of the New Republic’s home system.

As soon as the loading ramp was lowered, the General stepped out of the plane to greet a tall, slender man that was waiting there for her. Exhausted from his planning with the General and now feeling awkward about his status as an ex-stormtrooper and how he would be perceived here, Finn stayed back by the ship, waiting for someone to tell him where he should be for all this.

As he watched C-3PO and Leia, he was caught off guard when Poe suddenly appeared at his side.

“I’m warning you now,” the pilot stated as he took off his helmet. “You might think this is some exciting Resistance mission, but you’ll be bored with all the politics that’ll be involved in no time.”

“Politics?” Finn asked. Leia had said nothing of that.

Poe ran a hand through his dark curls, putting it back into place after the flight. “Of course. There’s a reason why she brought you here instead of attempting to do this back at base.” He looked at Finn and winked, “I don’t think she’s actually asked for permission to do this yet.”

Finn soon found out that Poe was right. The two of them sat in the back of a huge auditorium type room, listening as Leia made her case to remaining representatives of the New Republic. Finn surprised himself by realizing that he was longing to just be a simple soldier again and not have to be involved in these seemingly endless debates. Listening to these politicians was becoming incredibly frustrating because to Finn it seemed like everyone agreed with Leia that it was a great plan, but no one wanted to commit to actually having it carried out. He really didn’t have the patience for this sort of life and respected the General even more for being able to keep sane after dealing with these people.

For the majority of the meeting, Poe would say jokes about the various members present under his breath, nearly making Finn laugh out loud multiple times. Finn kept throwing Poe threatening looks if he didn’t stop which were completely ineffective. The pilot knew that he was enjoying the distraction from the bickering politicians more than he’d ever admit. Finn caught himself admiring how laid back and casual the pilot could be during all this, as if the fate of the war wasn’t currently being discussed in front of him.

_There’s got to be a limit to his good qualities_ , Finn thought as Poe smiled wide as he laughed quietly at one of his own jokes.

Then he had his thoughts pulled away from Poe, he heard his name being called out by one of the politicians in the room.

“I say we meet this Finn! I’d like to hear the plan from the Stormtroopers own mouth then see if we can trust in such a bold move!”

Finn looked nervously to the General, he hadn’t been prepared to speak to all of them like this. She only nodded and beckoned him to join her. Before he could stand up, Finn’s hand was being squeezed tightly. Looking to his side, Poe had leaned in close, his classic heart stopping smirk on his face.

“You got this buddy,” Poe whispered encouragingly. “Be yourself and they’ll listen to you. Your plan is solid!”

That rogue smile of his gave Finn courage. He swallowed hard and smiled back at Poe. Slipping his hand out from the pilot’s grasp he began walking towards the center speaking podium that Leia stood before.

“I can do this, I can do this,” he whispered to himself, unable to gather any thoughts as to what he should say to the people assembled around him.

Finn stepped up to the podium and looked out into the crowd of representatives. _Just be myself, like Poe said_. He took a steadying breath, ready for anything that they could throw at him.

“Finn, is it?” And older human man asked of him.

“Yessir.”

“Finn, while I know a more that a few people in the room would disagree with me,” he began, “I’m not going to go into the details of or question your loyalty to the Resistance or the New Republic. I believe I can safely assume that if General Organa brought you here before us today, then you are in fact not a spy for the First Order.”

Finn nodded that he understood. He also had to hold in a sigh of relief, he felt that his actions against the First Order proved that he was no longer loyal to them, and he couldn’t stand be constantly doubted about it.

“Tell me then Finn,” the old man continued. “Why do you think your plan going to work? What insight can you provide us that’ll make this so-called stormtrooper rebellion possible?”

_You got this buddy_ , Poe’s words echoed in Finn’s mind.

“Stormtroopers in the First Order are trained from birth,” Finn began, slowly gaining confidence with each word. “We are bred and expected to follow orders without any question, and we do. Even I did. I never even considered if what the First Order was doing was wrong until we were given the orders to decimate a small village on Jakku just because they witnessed what we had done there. Even in that moment I questioned my own thoughts more than I was questioning their orders. It what I was raised to do, and they did their job nearly perfectly.

“But there was always one thing that affected even the most dedicated and unwavering Stormtrooper: Transfer Order 855. T.O. 855 was the code for when new troopers arrived on Starkiller base. And by new, I mean newly acquired. Even though we were told that every trooper was volunteered to join the First Order by their parents, it was common knowledge that we were stolen as small children or infants, to be indoctrinated. Whenever we had to work that detail and escort the personal with the new recruits into the facility, I can guarantee that every trooper felt the same sympathy for what they would have to endure. Every trooper felt that sting of the loss of their blood family, and the unity that they would have naturally had with them. Stormtroopers weren’t taught to work as brothers as they used to be in the days of the Clone Wars. We were taught to be never failing pieces in a larger machine.

“But we all wanted something more than that. We all felt that lack of emotional ties that I’ve learned that the rest of the galaxy has. I’ve found a family within the Resistance, people that legitimately care about my personal welfare.” Finn couldn’t help glancing over at Poe for just a second. “And I believe I can help the Stormtroopers realized that they can find a family outside of the Order as well. And once they know that, they will always doubt the First Order, and hopefully they’ll escape and choose to join this cause, like I did.”

To Finn’s surprise, a number of the New Republic members began applauding him once he finished speaking. He turned to look at Leia, who was beaming proudly, and outstretched her hand to take his. She stepped up next to Finn, speaking to the audience.

“The bottom line here is, we need not threaten these Stormtroopers to leave, but we should give them hope! Hope is what brought down the Empire, and it will be what crumbles the foundation of the First Order. Finn is the hope for a better future that they need to see, and once they see it they will leave their ranks!”

Cheers began around the room. Finn smiled at the positive response, his own hope rising that he could make a difference.

“You did good, kid,” the General said to him, motioning that he should go back to his seat.

As he walked away from the center spotlight he saw Poe standing and clapping for him. Finn walked faster, eager to get back to his friends side where he felt most comfortable.

“I knew you had this, Finn!” Poe shouted, grabbing his shoulders. “I hope you’re ready to give them hell, because I know I am!”

Finn smiled fiercely, knowing he was finally ready for this. He was about to cause trouble for the First Order that they would never expect, and Finn couldn’t ask for a better partner to cause that trouble with.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, I’m still trying to get this bit of the story rolling, but I have a feeling that writing will start going a little bit smoother next chapter! Thanks for sticking with me ;3;


	3. Chapter 3

After the door closed behind Finn, he slid down to ground, mentally exhausted. For the past ten hours, Finn had been stuck in a room with a team of people that were meant to help him come up with the perfect set of recordings to infiltrate the First Order with and hopefully inspire its Stormtroopers to break ranks. He soon learned that recording a message would not be as simple as he thought.

Finn was asked to rack his brain for code words or numbers that were only used among the troopers and not the higher ranking officials to try and keep the messages as coded as possible. Then after they had come up with what everyone agreed was what seemed to be vague wording, but was actually a loaded message, Finn had to say it over and over again. Every inflection, pause, and pronunciation was overly criticized and he needed to say everything just perfect. At one point his voice became too devoid of emotion and was robotic. When played back to him he could barely recognize that he was speaker even though he had just recorded it. This lead to a whole new fresh wave of speaking into that microphone.

After having to talk for so long and having to hear it repeated so much, at this point Finn would be happy to never hear his own voice again.

“Looks like you could use a pick me up,”

Finn looked up at Poe standing above him, hand outstretched, looking like the very definition of cool. His messy black curls were somehow sitting perfectly as usual, dark eyes that looked as if they hadn’t a care in the world excited to see him, a wide grin lit up his face, and add in the dark brown leather jacket that Finn hadn’t seen before made him look perfect.

“New jacket?” Finn asked, taking the pilot’s offered hand and getting back on his feet.

“New to me, but actually pretty old,” Poe responded, now showing off the different angles of the jacket. Finn wanted to scoff at the pilot’s antics but strangely couldn’t take his eyes off of him. “Used to be my dad’s when we was fighting for the Rebellion. See, it’s still got his original rebel patch on it right here,” he pointed out a weathered patch that was stitched into the arm of the jacket, the red rebel insignia standing out in the center of it.

“Dad had heard some guy that looked better than me took my old one and sent me this so I wouldn’t get cold during those long lonely nights flying through space,” Poe emphasized his fake sob story with a dramatic sigh. Finn just laughed tiredly and rolled his eyes.

“But now that you’re here, are you free for the night?” Poe asked enthusiastically.

“Yeah,” Finn responded slowly, wary of what the pilot might have in mind for the evening.

“Well let’s get you that pick me up! I know I’m not supposed to take you outside the senate building, but I found a private bar a few stories down from here that’s well within our limited boundaries.”

Finn groaned, the memory of the first (and last) time that Poe took him drinking was still a painful one.

“Don’t be so dramatic, I apologized for that one time,” Poe said, crossing his arms. “It wasn’t completely my fault that I couldn’t tell when you got drunk. Believe me I would’ve stopped you sooner if I didn’t know you wouldn’t be able to hold your alcohol in the long run.”

“Poe I don’t know-”

“Please finn!” Poe begged, grabbing Finn’s arms and giving him a look of faked sadness from his wide eyes. “I promise just one drink to relax and we’ll come back to the room! I need to get out of here and I don’t want to sit at the bar by myself!”

Finn sighed, knowing that any argument he put forth would be useless, he knew he’d end up going with Poe. He would make sure that he didn’t drink that much though, he had no intentions of reliving that hangover from hell.

“Fine, alright, lets go,” Finn said exasperated as Poe cheered his own victory. He went over to Finn’s bed in the room they were sharing, then grabbed and threw him his jacket from across the room.

“Gotta make sure you’re still looking better than me buddy,” the pilot said with a wink while Finn put on the leather jacket.

Finn had barely gotten his hands through the sleeves as Poe started to pull him through the door. He smiled at the pilots eagerness, glad to know that the stress that the War constantly put on him wasn’t dampening his spirit. Next to the General, Poe put in the most work in the Resistance to try and defeat the First Order and he definitely deserved this break to relax and pretend that the fate of the galaxy didn’t rest on his shoulders.

The bar that Poe had found was surprisingly quiet considering how many people were inside. It had at atmosphere of class and sophistication that made Finn feel immediately out of place. It seemed that the muted environment had no effect on the pilot as he greeted the few people he knew inside wholeheartedly, causing a few patrons to stare at them as they passed.

They chose a more secluded corner of the bar to sit down at. Finn, still being inexperienced on what he should get had Poe order for him. He suspiciously eyed the dark amber liquid that was set before him a moment later.

“Don’t worry Finn, I promise it’s something mild,” Poe assured him as he took a swig of his own drink. “The last thing I want to be doing tonight is dragging you back to the room.”

“Last time it was technically your fault that I couldn’t walk…” Finn reminded him, taking a sip of his drink.

Soon the two were laughing over the ridiculousness of Finn’s day. Poe was particularly entertained by the fact that Finn had to pronounce the word ‘Resistance’ twenty different times because they thought he sounds too serious when he said it.

“I cannot believe they had you locked in that room for ten hours repeating a total of, what, eight sentences?” Poe laughed, finishing his first drink and motioning for the bartender to bring him another. “That’s insane Finn. I would’ve left after twenty minutes, I can’t sit for that long.”

“Don’t you sit for longer than that in your X-Wing?” Finn asked, always trying to call the pilot out when he exaggerated like that.

“Yes but I’m actually _doing_ something,” Poe explained, “like, you know, flying.”

As the two of them laughed at Poe’s dumb joke, the bartender, a tall and stunning Twi’lek, came around to give Poe his drink. After he accepted it and turned back to Finn, she still lingered and leaned into closer to the pilot. Poe noticed Finn glancing away from him then looked over to see who he was looking at then realized that she had been staring at him.

“I haven’t seen you in here before, stranger,” she practically purred at him. “Normally it’s only the politicians and their lackeys that frequent our place. You look like neither.”

Poe shrugged and replied, “Nope, just a pilot.”

He started to turn back to Finn when the Twi’lek places a dark blue hand on his shoulder, turning him back towards her. Unexpectedly, Finn felt anger rising up within him at the Twi’lek’s forwardness.

“I’d love to hear more about the adventures of being a pilot,” she said softly, “maybe we could share stories over a drink after my shift?”

Finn watched in dismay as the pilot raised an eyebrow at her request? He had been hoping to have the pilot to himself without interruption, but it looked like he might be interested… _Of course he’d be interested, just look at her! He’d be an idiot not to ditch me…_

“Thanks, but I’ve already got good company tonight,” Poe dropped her a wink then very obviously turned his back to her to focus back on Finn.

Finn couldn’t help but smirk and feel a little smug that Poe has chosen him over the opportunity to spend the night with the Twi’lek. He couldn’t quite explain it to himself why, but a possessiveness for the pilot had overtaken him. Probably just as a result of nearly losing him on Jakku…

Poe had restarted their conversation, as if nothing had happened. Finn wasn’t about to let that go without some acknowledgement.

“Wait wait wait,” Finn interrupted. “You’re not going to address the obviously gorgeous person you just turned down?”

Poe frown in confusion, “Why would I?”

“Well,” Finn now suddenly feeling awkward about bringing it up, his stomach turned into knots. “I mean, you’re single aren’t you? She could’ve been a good find?”

Poe shrugged. “Not my type.”

 _Ah_. “Okay, so not into aliens, that’s understandable.”

Poe laughed lightly at that. He brought his glass up to his lips and before drinking he said simply, “No, not that. I’m not into women.”

Finn started at him for a moment, then quickly looked away, his heart unexplainably now racing.

“Oh. That’s… cool.” Was all Finn could respond with to this new information. He had always wondered why Finn wasn’t with any of the eligible women on the Resistance base. He seems like such a lady killer. This explanation, for whatever reason, had never occurred to him.

“So, what’s on the agenda for tomorrow?” Poe asked casually.

“Uh, the General said that they would be focusing mostly on trying to figure out the technical side of actually getting the message into the First Order Systems. Pretty sure I’m free for the day.” Finn replied, wondering if Poe had changed the subject on purpose.

“Alright then, no early start. That’s good to hear,” Poe quickly downed his second drink. “Mind if we stay here a bit longer?”

“No! Not at all!” Finn answered, probably a little to enthusiastically. He was all for spending more time with his friend, and maybe learning a little more about him.

For a while, Finn listened to Poe talk about his fellow X-Wing pilots back on base. There had apparently been rumors of a few of them hooking up and Poe had wasted no time in making sure they were the center of everyone of his jokes. Finn had always been a little envious of the friendship that his squad shared, especially since he had little to no comradery between his fellow Stormtroopers when he had been in the First Order. But soon after getting to know everyone, Finn noticed that Poe seemed to separate himself from the rest of the group. They seemed like his family, yet, why would Poe but some invisible barrier between him and them?

“Poe, can I ask you something?” The alcohol in Finn’s system must be making him bold. He really wanted to know what was going on in the pilot’s head.

“Ask away,” the pilot replied.

“Why are you always alone?”

Poe looked around the room and back at Finn, mild humor and confusion in his face. “I’m not exactly alone right now?”

“Not like that,” how could Finn explain his question better? “You’re never, _with_ people Poe. Your have these great friendships and I see you smile and laugh and as soon as they look away, you-you disconnect. Almost like your mind is someone far away from your body. No one is really alone, like the way you're alone. The way you make yourself alone.”

Poe’s smile faded a little at that. He purses his lips, obviously thinking of how to answer. Finn began to wish that he didn’t ask him about this as the silence stretched on.

“Finn, to be honest, I’ve lost a lot of sleep over exactly what you asked me,” he was smiling again, but now avoiding Finn’s eyes. “Over the years, I’ve tried to distance myself because I’m not good for other people.” He paused, drinking deeply from his mug.

“People have died around me, Finn. They die or they break past the point of return and it’s hard living with myself knowing that.”

“Poe I’m sorry I didn’t know-”

“It’s fine, Finn,” Poe said with a sad laugh. “You couldn’t have known. No one really knows. I tend to have people gravitate towards me, and I always tell myself it’s because I’m a natural leader or something. But I have to stop them from getting too close, because with me they’ll get lost…” the pilot laughed darkly as he stared into his mug, swirling the last bit of drink around the bottom.

That laugh sounded haunted to Finn, as if it was the only thing Poe could do to keep himself from breaking down. He regretted prodding into his private life, and had no idea how to turn the situation around.

“It’s late,” Poe said lightly, throwing a handful of credits onto the bar top. “I should get you back to the room in case the General needs you early.”

A grin was back on Poe’s face, but Finn could tell that it didn’t reach his eyes. They walked in silence on the way back to their room, and Finn became more upset with himself with every step. This was the first time he could remember that neither of them were talking to each other-they _always_ talked. Others complained about how they couldn’t shut up around each other.

 _I hope I didn’t ruin this,_ Finn thought as they reached the room.

Poe bid him a goodnight and shortly got into his bed without another word. There was just enough light in the dark room to make out the outline of the pilot in his bed, and Finn stared at the his back from across the room. He had no idea that the care free yet incredibly dedicated pilot carried such a heavy burden with him. And who was he referring to? Who had died and who had been broken supposedly because of him?

Finn knew that Poe himself couldn’t be the source of the bad luck. Sometimes bad things happened to good people, and Poe was unfortunately in the center of the bad things that happened around him. But it nearly broke his heart to think that Poe blamed himself for it all. What could’ve lead the pilot to the conclusion that it was all his fault?

He didn’t sleep easy that night. Finn had only wanted to get to know his friend better, and now he was worried that he had only pushed him further away by making him remember his doubts on getting close to anyone…

***********

The next few days past by in a blur. Poe was his usual smug and optimistic self after their night out, not that Finn got to see much of him. The General had kept them so busy by helping her out with what she needed to accomplish there, the both of them were dead tired by the time they made it back to their shared room. Finn was still troubled by Poe revelations, opening up just enough for Finn to glimpse his inner demons that lurked inside, but he had no idea what he should do.

Finn had never delt with others emotions like this-living in the First Order meant you didn’t have the privilege of deeper feelings. He also didn’t have much time to really consider what he should say to Poe, as Leia had him helping the New Resistance techs by giving him any knowledge that he had on their communication systems.

He had been pushed for three straight days to give them every detail of every person and place he encountered while working within the First Order. He was talking about it so much that he had started to dream about being back there. And now that he was trying and failing to deal with these new nightly terrors, he had even less ideas on how to help Poe with his fears. He wasn’t exactly in a position to help someone else if he had no clue how to help himself…

When the day came that Leia announced to Finn and the New Republic that they would be leaving Coruscant the next morning, Finn was relieved. He actually found himself satisfied, and even proud of himself with the work that he helped with, knowing that they were now taking a huge step forward to defeating the First Order. But he was also done dealing with the political bureaucrats and how they treated Poe, Leia and himself for being members of the Resistance.

Even though they were the ones who had tried to warn the Galaxy about the threat of the First Order and they were the ones that had taken out Starkiller base alone, there were still treated as outsiders. To many, Leia had been seen as a traitor to the New Republic after she left their senate to lead the Resistance and began operating on her own. They still not-so-subtly reminded her that she had taken her role as a known rebel too far and believed that if she had kept her head down and stayed with the New Republic that they might’ve been able to work together to stop the First Order before. The General has stop him from defending her and the Resistance, pulling Finn aside and telling him that it was no use getting them any more displeased with them while they all had to work together.

It was early afternoon on their last day there when Leia told Finn that he was dismissed for the day and should get some rest. They planned on leaving in the early hours of the next morning and Leia wanted him to be at his best. After not sleeping much the past few days, Finn was grateful for a chance to catch up on his sleep without risking waking Poe up. He knew Poe was currently out in the city acquiring some new experimental weaponry for his X-Wing, so Finn would have the room to himself.

Once in the room Finn had barely kicked off his boots before collapsing onto his bed. He had been paranoid that his new nightmares might make him shout out on the night, waking the pilot who had to share the room with him, thus preventing him from even more sleep. Before he gave in fully to his tiredness, he looked over to his friends bed, hoping that at least the pilot wasn’t losing sleep over the ones he’d lost…

_Finn was back on Jakku, feeling the weight of his Stormtrooper armor on him. The closest person he had to a friend, Slips, was dying in his arms. Again._

_What could he do?_

_The sounds of screams and blaster fire surrounded him. He needed to make a choice; fight or flee?_

“Fight, _FN-2187” a voice whispered brutally in his head. “Avenge your friend and kill those who took his life.”_

_It was Kylo Ren inside his head. Immediately FN-2187 followed the violent impulses and shot down anyone that stood before him. They were weak, and he, a trooper of the First Order, was not. He would prove that to them._

_As FN-2187 stood at the end of a trail of bodies that he had made, he looked at the destruction that was taking place around him. Fire ravaged the tiny huts circling him, the civilians still cried out in fear, his fellow stormtroopers gathering the rest and lining them up for slaughter._

_FN-2187 has never felt so alive_.

_There was a dark hooded figure towering over a prison before him. Ren. The prisoner was forced to his knees, his head bowed in defeat. Ren then turned to FN-2187 and summoned him over._

_“I want you to kill him,” Ren’s voice echoed in his mind. He brought his gun up into firing position, putting the prisoner in his sight._

_The prison looked up, regarding FN-2187 with a look of hate and defiance. His black curls were stuck to the sweat on his forehead, his teeth bared in a fierce grin that dared the trooper to pull the trigger, and his eyes were still bright and rebellious, even while being confronted with death. FN-2187 seemed to recognize the prisoner in the back of his mind. No, not prisoner, but the pilot._

_“Kill him.” This time Ren spoke the command, yet it still reverberated in his mind, as if he shouted it at the top of his lungs. Without further hesitation, FN-2187 embraced his leaders hate within himself and pulled the trigger-_

Finn woke forcefully, immediately sitting up in bed and breathing heavily. He was so overwhelmed by the intensity of the dream he had to triple check the Poe’s body wasn’t lying at the foot of his bed. He moved his feet from the bed to the floor, needing to get up and distract himself, but he was shaking so badly he couldn’t stand. He bent forward and but his head into his hands, now trying not to throw up. His actions in his dream was making him sick to his stomach, regardless of the fact that he knew he didn’t commit them… but he knew that he could’ve… That was nearly his fate that night.

Then Finn’s luck turned again when he heard the door hiss open. _Great, now Poe gets to see me like this_. Finn didn’t even attempt to move as he heard the pilot’s gasp of surprise when he caught sight of him.

“Finn are you alright?” The concern in the pilot’s voice make Finn feel even worse, he must look awful for the pilot to sound like that.

“No.” Finn said, his voice unsteady. “No, I mean yes, I’ll be fine I just need-” _By the stars what do I need?_

Finn felt the pilot take a seat next to him, then a comforting arm pulling him into the pilot’s side. The pilot’s embrace immediately started to have a positive effect on him. He didn’t know how long they sat there, but eventually Finn regained control of his body, the shaking stopped and he felt like he was able to breath freely again.

“What happened Finn?” Poe asked. “Did someone do something to you?”

“What? No no, nothing like that,” Finn responded, taking a deep breath to steady himself. “It was just a dream… About Ren.”

Finn saw Poe stiffen next to him. For whatever reason the pilot seemed to react badly to his name whenever that name was mentioned. Finn always found that odd, since when Poe was captured and tortured by Ren, he had shown nothing but courage and sarcasm in the face of that evil.

“Was it about your fight with him? Did you have to relive that?”

Finn shook his head. “No, that I can deal with. I was back on Jakku, and Ren got into my head… I think he was using the Force to turn me into the killing machine that they wanted me to be… What I almost was…”

“Does he do that? Can he do that?” Poe inquired, concern heavy in his tone.

“Not to me, no,” Finn said relieved. The idea of being under Ren’s mental control was terrifying. “But I’ve heard stories. He’s supposed to be powerful enough to influence you, hear your thoughts, and to actually break into your mind and plant ideas there. I don’t know how much of it is true or how much he can really do, but he’s said to be the one of the most powerful dark side users ever in that aspect.”

Finn watched as Poe became silent at that. He was staring ahead at nothing, his eyebrows creased as if we was trying to work out a complex problem, and an uncharacteristic frown pulled down at his lips. What concerned Finn though was his eyes-why were they suddenly wide with fear? _Was he scared of Ren?_ Finn had never known the pilot to be afraid of any enemy, no matter how powerful.

Poe then snapped out of his reverie and turned back to Finn. His face now warm and sympathetic. “Listen buddy, I wouldn’t normally admit this to anyone but you’re always an exception. I’ve dealt with something similar, nightmares that have haunted me for weeks on end. I don’t know how these things work but I did my best to deal and with these issues in the real world, and eventually things went back to the way they almost were.

“I promise though, I will always do everything in my power to make sure Kylo Ren never gets to you again. He won’t ever have the chance to use his dark force powers against you.”

“Thanks Poe,” Finn replied gratefully. He still didn’t think he necessarily need a protector, but he was glad that he had one.

“Listen I’m starving,” Poe said, not-so-gracefully changing the subject. “I was going to ask if you wanted to go out but I can bring you something back-”

“Nah, I’ll go with you,” Finn carefully got to his feet, relieved that he no longer felt sick or shaken. “I’d rather have the company then be stuck here alone, you know?”

“No arguments from me,” Poe smiled and led them from the room.

While they walked through the winding maze like hallways of the upper floors of the senate building, Poe rambled on about some new upgraded engines he was planning on having installed on his X-Wing. While Finn only understood about half of the specs Poe talked about, he was glad to have a distraction from his day. He was also more grateful than he could express that Poe wasn’t treating him like something was wrong with Finn. Having the support for a moment of weakness and then no judgment after was more that Finn could ever ask for from his friend.

Poe took them to a fancy looking establishment, where most of the walls were filled with long windows that overlooked the city planet. Poe got them a seat near the kitchen, but were they could still see the setting sun and the stunning colors it turned it the sky. Finn had once confessed to Poe that he had loved seeing sunsets and sunrises. When he was stationed on both Starkiller and the Finalizer he maybe saw a handful of them in his entire life, and since telling him, the pilot always seemed to find a way for Finn to see more. He’d never said anything after, but he was always thankful for moments like this knowing that Poe had probably planned this for him.

They are their meal without much talk. Finn was enjoying the companionable silence while he watched the sky turn from light blue to pink to purple then black. More than once he thought he caught Poe staring at him from the corner of his eye, but then shook it off as just a trick of the light. They continued to sit at their booth long after their plates had been cleared, talking about many things.

“I hope Rey is doing alright,” Finn mused, wondering where his scavenger friend might be now.

“So do I,” Poe responded. “The General says no news is good news, but an update wouldn’t really hurt too.”

“Think she’ll come back a Jedi? That Skywalker is training her now?” Finn asked, knowing that there was no way Poe could really know the answer.

“Hard to say,” Poe said with a shrug and a thoughtful look. “I know he’s in exhale because of what had happened with… what happened before, but I think Rey might give him hope to try again.”

Then Poe added with a chuckle, “But don't worry too much, Jedi or not I’m sure Rey will be waiting for you too.”

_Huh? What’s that’s supposed to mean?_

“Why would Rey be waiting for me? To wake up from my coma, you mean?”

“No,” Now Poe looked as confused as Finn felt. “Isn’t she your girl?”

Finn had to laugh at that. “My girl? Ha! No! I might’ve been interested when we first met, but I soon learned that she didn’t need me like that. She’s too independent to be held back by anyone. I let that attachment go quickly.” He laughed again and shrugged. “I guess she wasn’t my type in the end.”

“Good to know,” Poe laughed, but Finn noticed that for a moment the pilot bit his lip and wasn’t paying attention to the conversation like he usually would. If not for Poe’s revelation of his romantic interests, Finn would’ve thought that the pilot might be interested in Rey…

Before he could ask what the pilot was thinking about, there was a shout from across the room that made both of them grab for their non-existent weapons. They looked to the source of the noise as saw four men standing and pointing at them from across the restaurant. Finn turned to ask Poe if he knew them and saw that Poe had started getting out of his seat.

“DAMERON!” A huge man ( _could a man even be that big?_ ) with bulging muscles and a giant pink scar running down his face shouted so loud Finn could swear the windows in the room shook in their frames.

“We gotta go,” Poe whispered, backing out of the booth and grabbing Finn’s sleeve. “Now, Finn! Gotta go now!”

Finn wasted no time in following Poe’s orders to run. He could hear the giant man roaring behind them and it sounded as if he was crashing through the tables and people between them to get to Poe. Finn followed Poe through the kitchen, darting around confused cooks and trying to avoid being burned by the piping hot equipment all around them. In no time they were running through some sort of storage room then they were through a door and back into the lush hallways of the senate building. There Poe froze, not knowing which way would be safest.

A plan was starting for form in Finn’s mind, he had been constantly plotting ways of escape in case of this very situation: the First Order must’ve caught up to them here. He grabbed Poe’s hand and started pulling them down the hallway, towards direction of the bar they had been to previously.

“Who are those guys?” Finn yelled to Poe as the raced together down a steep winding ramp. “First Order?”

“First Order? No no! They uh, used to be friends of sorts,” Poe yelled back a bit embarrassingly.

“Friends?! Why are your friends trying to kill you!”

“Well,” Poe started, but at that very moment they heard crashing from behind and above them. They must’ve followed them then broke down the last door they tried locking behind them.

“Let’s just say, they really don’t like me much anymore,” Poe began while he picked up his pace. “Um, do you know where you’re going Finn?”

Finn didn’t reply, he was too busy trying to focus on going the right way. Two days before he had walked past a nightclub of sorts, where there had been a number of people milling about outside of it. He hoped to lose their pursuers in the crowd. When they passed a set of lifts, Poe tried to stop him so they could use them.

“No they’re too slow,” Finn responded, now taking him to a door that led to a set of service stairs. “And they’d be able to see what floor we were going to!”

And as the door was closing behind them, they heard the roar of Poe’s name from behind them. Finn had no idea whether they saw them come this way or not, so to gain some ground between them he hoped over the railing of the staircase and jumped down to the next floor, skipping the steps all together.

“Finn wait a sec!” Poe shouted from above him.

Finn looked up and saw the pilot leaning over the railing, looking down at Finn with admiration and awe.

He grinned back up at Poe, “Come on pilot, You’re not scared of taking a little leap, are you?”

That was the only motivation he needed. Without another thought Poe had leapt over the railing and landed next to Finn. “Lead the way, renegade,” Poe said, extending out a hand.

In just a few moments they had jumped down another four stories. Finn thought they had reached the right level when the heard the sound of metal banging on metal. Their ‘friends’ knew they had come this way.

“Keep up Poe, we’ll lose them up ahead!” Finn grabbed his hand and pulled him through another door. They had only made it a surprisingly short distance when they heard the four men behind them again, now screaming for Damerons blood. When they got out of this, Poe would have a lot of questions to answer.

When they rounded the corner, Finn was momentarily relieved to find they had reached the nightclub he saw earlier. The only issue now was that there wasn’t nearly enough people outside of it now to provide decent cover for them. Hoping his decision wouldn’t get them killed, Finn dragged Poe through the entrance into the club.

Finn was happy to see the dark, smoky atmosphere inside from the various pipes being smoked around the large circular room. The lighting was dim which would make them harder to spot if they could find somewhere to hide. Finn jogged along the wall of the club, trying to find a place that would be obvious. As he ran they passed multiple alcoves in the walls in which couples had retreated into for a little more privacy. _That’s it! The perfect cover._

Screams were heard from the front of the club where they entered. They must be here now. Finn finally passed an empty alcove and forcefully shoved Poe against the far wall. He them leaned in close, putting his forearm against the wall near Poe’s face, hoping it would help block out the light so no one could get a good look at him just from glancing in.

Poe tried craning his neck to look out past Finn’s shoulders asking, “Finn is this really the best place-”

Finn put his hand on Poe’s chin, turning his head away from where it could be seen and effectively shutting up the pilot. “Shhh,” Finn whispered under his breath, straining to hear if they were being approached by their enemies. It wasn’t long before they heard the sounds of a fight breaking out, Poe’s name being screamed out in frustration and hatred, then security blaring out over the crowd that the offenders were being escorted to a holding facility, and to go back to their evening activities.

It was only then that Finn took a sigh of relief, feeling as if he had been holding his breath for the past few minutes. He turned his head to say something sarcastic to the pilot, but when he looked at him at that very moment, adrenaline still pounding in his veins and his mind clearer than it had been in weeks, Finn’s whole universe shifted.

That split second of realization lasted ages in Finn’s mind. It was almost as if he was looking at Poe for the first time, really _truly_ seeing him. Their faces were so close together Finn could see every detail of him. He was biting his lower lip white teeth shining against his full lips. Poe was staring back at him with wide eyes, Finn thought he could stare into those dark eyes of his for an eternity, now bright and inviting in the pulsing lights, with pupils dilated in excitement. His skin was flushed from the chase, and his black hair was now a wild mess-Finn longed to run his hand through it. And the scent of him had completely surrounded Finn, a deep, almost woodsy musk that was accented by the familiar and now comforting metallic smell of oil and grease from when he worked on his X-Wing that always lingered around him.

Every unexplainable feeling he had for the pilot in the past suddenly made sense. The need to be close to him, the comfort of his touch, sudden jealousy of others vying for his attention, the sadness of any form of rejection no matter how small-it was all fitting together in Finn’s head. The answer to what he wanted had been right here, in front of him all along. Why he couldn’t just leave the Resistance, and why he always dreamt the pilot would be with him if he left. He wanted Poe. He _needed_ him.

Finn huffed out the air in his lungs almost as if he had been punched in the gut, then smiled widely. His sudden revelation of what he needed was satisfyingly intoxicating and somehow intensely painful all at once. He didn’t know he could have these extreme and unexpected feelings inside him all at once. It was overwhelming and terrifying and wonderful.

_How have I not seen him before? Really seen him?_

Without thinking, just acting purely on his heart's instincts, Finn began to lean in closer to the pilot. There wasn’t much distant to close between the two of them and Finn just wanted to-

“Finn, buddy! That was brilliant!” Poe burst Finn’s bubble of revelation, as he moved his face past Finn’s and pulled him in for a quick hug and thumping him on the back. “I can’t believe you got us away from those guys, this plan was amazing!”

“Uh yeah,” Finn cleared his throat and tried to respond normally, his head still pounding with thoughts only about the pilot. “It was nothing, Poe.”

Finn couldn’t help himself but smile as he said the pilot’s name.

“Let’s get out of here, I doubt local security will have them held for long,” Poe quickly ducked past Finn and headed for the exit. Finn followed closely, his whole body still spinning.

“So who exactly were those guys? They weren’t exactly fans of yours,” Finn asked Poe, now that they were back in the relative quiet outside the club, he needed something to distract him from wanting to just grab the pilot and pull him against his chest right then and there and-

“Ah, well you see,” Poe began awkwardly. “When I left the New Republic to join the Resistance, not everyone saw it as the heroic choice that I did. A number of pilots I used to fly with labeled me as a traitor. The big guy that was chasing us, Baturr, his family fought against the Empire right along side of mine, so he was one of the ones that took my departure the hardest. He thought I was dishonoring all the people that had fought and died to start the New Republic. Many threatened to teach me a lesson about loyalty if they ever found me. And of course this all happened right after Moran died, and more people starting thinking his death might not have been the accident everyone was told it was… I really never got a chance to fully explain my reasonings to anyone before I left, or to tell anyone what really happened to Moran…”

“Was Moran a friend of yours?” Poe could easily relate to being called a traitor and hunted down for it, but he had a feeling that this was the real issue that might be haunting Poe.

He only nodded in response, then took a moment before speaking again.

“Yeah, Moran was a good friend, but more than that… That’s a whole different story, I promise I’ll tell you all about him someday, but for now…” Poe sniffed and and lifted his head high, “for now we’ll just stick to turning traitor and the apparent fun that comes with that.”

Finn knew that Poe was hurting, he could hear his voice nearly break when he said his friends name. _That must be the person he thought he was responsible for the death of…_

“I do know a thing or two about being considered a traitor,” Finn replied lightly, not wanting to press Poe to talk if he wasn’t ready. “But seriously? People actually consider you a traitor? _Poe Dameron_ , hero of the Resistance and the pilot responsible for the destruction of Starkiller, an unloyal traitor?”

Finn felt a small twinge of satisfaction seeing the pilot blush at his statement.

“Come on now, I’m not the only one that took down Starkiller,” Poe said sheepishly, pushing into Finn’s arm with his shoulder. “I mean, I’d say I was essential in taking down, but not solely responsible.”

Laughing at the pilot’s fake humility, they reached their shared room. Once inside they decided they should finish packing up their things, as they did have to leave early the next morning. Finn finished quickly, as he only packed the essentials and kept his things all in one place. He went over to the pilot’s half of the room to help him retrieve his scattered belongings.

Picking up the pilot’s red and black helmet- _Why was this the room? It should be with his X-Wing!_ -Finn asked, “Do you think we’ll be safe to leave tomorrow? With your old friends knowing we’re here?”

“It’s a good thing we are leaving so soon,” Poe replied. “The longer we’re here the more chances they’ll have to find us again. I’m sure it wasn’t only those four that hold a grudge against me, and I’m afraid that they might get some back up to come looking for me... And really Finn, thanks again for getting us out of that fight, you really saved our asses tonight.”

Finn walked over to him, intending on handing over the helmet he found, but instead he placed it over Poe’s head. “Anything to keep you safe, pilot.”

Poe aimed his crooked grin at him, sending Finn’s heart into overdrive. Finn was once again overwhelmed with the intensity of his these newfound feelings for Poe. One of his hands lingered on the side of the helmet, then slowly dropped down and his fingertips just grazed Poe’s jawline and stopped at his chin. Finn thought his chest would burst, Poe just standing there smiling at him was enough to break his heart.

Startling Finn from his lovesick moment, Poe’s hand was suddenly on top of his. Shocking him even further, Poe actually pressed Finn’s hand firmly onto his cheek. Finn stopped breathing as he watched Poe’s eyes slowly close, as if he was enjoying his touch just as much as Finn did his. Then Finn’s heart must’ve stopped as he thought:  _does Poe feel the same way about me?_

Poe’s hand curled around Finn’s fingers, then to his dismay Poe pulled them away from his face and dropped Finn’s hand. He was obviously avoiding looking at Finn as he took off his helmet.

“I can’t do this Finn,” he said quietly, his voice eerily devoid of emotion, staring only at the helmet in his hands.

Finn’s insides went cold. He had clearly crossed a line, overstepped some boundary and he needed to apologize. But he could’ve sworn for a moment that Poe wanted this too..

He reached out to Poe, but was stopped short by the pilots sharp “ _Don’t_.” Finn’s hand was frozen, outstretched between the two of them. _How can I fix this?_ He thought desperately. Literally everything had changed for Finn in the past half hour, he hadn't expected to discover this desperate need for Poe, and had never thought that there might actually be some similar feelings from the pilot too. _He pulled my hand closer, I know he did!_

“Poe I’m sorry,” Finn said quickly, “I’ll fix this just please tell me what I did wrong and I’ll-”

“Finn stop.” Poe interrupted, his voice still flat and harsh. He started gathering up everything he had on his bed into his backpack. “This isn’t something you can fix, this is a _me_ problem.”

Finn took a step closer to the pilot. “Poe I don’t understand, please just tell me what I did-”

“Nothing! You’ve done nothing wrong Finn!” Poe burst out, his voice shaking, his eyes full of pain. “I just can’t! We can’t-I won’t do this to you!”

“What are you talking about? Poe you’re not making any sense-what’s wrong with us?” Finn bit his lip, he hadn’t meant to say that. He wasn’t trying to imply that they were or that they should be a something more, not when Poe was so upset.

“Finn please, don’t let me get close to you” the pilot pleaded, stepping away from his friend. “Finn,  _I don’t want to hurt you!”_

Finn cocked his head in confusion and concern. _Hurt him? Poe would never. Poe couldn’t hurt him, it was completely against his nature._

“Poe calm down, let’s talk-”

BANGBANGBANG

They both jumped as someone pounded on their door. Momentarily distracted from their current situation, Finn, followed closely by Poe, quietly stepped over to the door to see through the intercom vid who was on the other side.

Finn sighed in relief. It was only the General. _But, what was she doing here at this hour? What was wrong? They had hours before they planned to leave._

Poe stepped next to Finn and opened the door. The General was calmly standing there, looking as regal and powerful as ever. She had an eyebrow raised in question and looked back and forth between the two of them.

“Hope I wasn’t interrupting you two, but we need to leave.” The General looked at them sternly. “ _Now_.” 

 


	4. Chapter 4

Finn helped Poe gather the rest of his scattered items in an awkward silence as General Organa watched and waited by the door. Finn had too many questions for the pilot: did he have feelings for him? Why would he let his past stop him from enjoying his future? And how could he even think that he might hurt Finn?

Unfortunately none of these could be comfortably asked in the presence of their commanding leader waiting on them to hurry up. Apparently Poe’s old New Republic pilot friends had gathered a few others that had issues with Poe as well and were planning on ambushing him in the morning. Luckily for them they didn’t know where Poe’s X-Wing was housed… at least not yet.

“Alright, let's go General,” Poe said as he put his backpack over his shoulder.

As Poe moved to the door Finn noticed that he had left something behind. “Wait a sec,” Finn went back to the pilot’s bed and picked up the helmet that had been shoved to the side and nearly buried under his blankets.

Finn held out the helmet to Poe, who looked at Finn sadly before putting on a smile and thanking him. There’s definitely something going on with him, Finn thought as he followed him and Leia out of their room.

The three of them walked in silence to the hanger, though Finn did notice that Leia had looked back over her shoulder at Poe more than once. Even she knew something was bothering him. Upon entering the hangar, Leia began walking in the opposite direction of where the ship they flew in on was grounded.

“General, your ship is over here,” Poe pointed down the line towards his X-Wing.

“Oh, I’m not taking that one,” the general replied simply. “I’ve decided it’s too risky. Someone here could’ve accidentally revealed to unsavory parties of which ship we came in on. I needed something unrecognizable as one of ours, so I acquired a different ship.”

She then moved to a tiny transport ship that Finn had just noticed C-3PO standing by. If Finn thought their last ship was a bad choice to be on if they were attacked, then this ship was the worst choice.

“No, absolutely not,” Poe shook his head, unable to barely look at the transport. “I know the other ship and I checked to make sure it’s space worthy. This thing wouldn’t take one hit before being blown out the sky!”

“Dameron, I can assure you that she’s got a few tricks,” she replied, all but ignoring his protests.

“Who told you this? Because I’m pretty sure you got swindled General.” Poe crossed his arms over his chest, clearly unimpressed.

“Well, I know I got swindled,” she said with a sad smile. “This used to be one of Han's old ships. Turns out he left this one here years ago so, it’s time to take it home with me.”

Neither Finn nor Poe had a response for that. They knew the death of her husband has been hard on her, and they weren’t about to tell her to leave behind a piece of him here, even if it was just a ship. Without anymore argument, Finn and Poe stored their things on the ship, double checked the Hyperspace lane coordinates, and were ready to leave.

Poe wished them luck and said he’d be following right behind them then ran off to get into his X-Wing. Finn’s heart dropped, wishing he could say something to the pilot to bridge whatever gap he had made between them. At least he knew they’d have time once they reached the Resistance base.

After a smooth take off and jump to lightspeed, Finn folded himself into a small corner seat in the transport. There wasn’t much room in the ship to walk around so he thought maybe he could get some sleep, though he soon admitted to himself that wouldn’t be possible with his mind in its current state. He hoped that once the pilot calmed down he’d be more willing to explain himself.

“Not that it’s really any of my business,” Leia suddenly asked, moving to stand next to Finn “but what has got you and Dameron all quiet? You two are normally a little more lively.”

Finn couldn’t help the small smirk that pulled up his lip, _of course she noticed. She’s been like a mother to Poe for so many years, she knows him better than anyone. Maybe she could give me a better insight into Poe’s head…_

“I guess I just pushed Poe a little past his comfort zone,” Finn started, a bit embarrassed to be talking to a General that was fighting one of the galaxy's greatest evils about feeling hurt by his crush’s rejection. “And when I asked what I did wrong he started just blaming himself, and wouldn’t tell me anything. I’d like to know what I can do to make that all just go away but it doesn’t seem like he’s about to open up about it…”

Leia clasped her hands in front of her, now looking more solemn than Finn would expect from telling her about his problem.

“Poe’s has had to travel a difficult path when it comes to his past relationships. It isn’t my place to go into the details of his private life, but I do know he carries a heavy guilt about what happened to those he’s been with. I personally believe that he isn’t at fault for what happened to them, but after the death of-”

Leia was interrupted by a startling alarm going off from the cockpit. Finn could barely hear C-3PO crying for help over the blaring sound. He quickly moved to the cockpit with the General to see what had gone wrong. Finn quickly turned off the alarm and started looking for the source of the problem.

_Of course_ , he thought, _right as I’m about to get answers this happens..._

“Master Finn, I do believe we have an issue with our fuel supply!” C-3PO informed him.

“What’re you talking about it says the fuels nearly full?” Finn pointed out the fuel gauge, which was clearly marked as full.

“No it’s not that, sir!” C-3PO continued, “The fuel is no longer reaching the engine! We only have minutes before we’re pulled out of Hyperspace, and if that happens there’s only a seven hundred thousand to one chance of survival! We’re doomed!”

“We’re not doomed,” Finn told the Droid while reaching over him to flip the switch to open the comms to talk with Poe. “Black Leader, you there?”

“Yeah I’m here Finn,” Poe’s voice responded immediately, “Everything okay?”

“Not really,” Finn explained. “Our engines aren’t getting fuel for some reason and we’ll be dead in the sky soon. What should we do?”

“Of course, it’s Solo’s ship,” Finn heard poe whisper over the comms. He quickly looked to Leia who was surprisingly nodding in agreement. “Great, give me one sec Finn, keep this channel open.”

Finn and Leia stood there over the ship's console, the looking at one another but not speaking. They both knew the consequences of having a ship die while in Hyperspace, and it wasn’t good.

“Alright Finn,” the moment Poe called back, Finn felt relieved-the pilot always had a back up plan. “I’m sending you coordinates to a nearby planet. We used to use it as a recon point in the New Republic but it’s pretty much deserted now. I’m also sending out a coded message to the Resistance to send us some back up. Thing is, I’m going to need you to manually drop out of Hyperspace. It’s not big deal, you’ve actually done it before when I was teaching you a few things a couple weeks ago, remember that?”

Finn groaned internally, “Yeah I remember. That was when the ship nearly broke into a thousand pieces, right?”

“Exactly!” Poe really shouldn’t sound so excited. “It’ll be another bumpy ride with that small ship, but just don’t force her to fly straight right away and she’ll eventually settle down.”

_Great. This’ll be fun._

“Okay so on my mark, disengage the autopilot and take the controls. And hopefully there’ll be end fuel left in the engines to set the ship down on the planet after.”

_Hopefully. That isn’t helping my nerves…_

“I’m ready when you are Poe,” I think.

Luckily for Finn the drop out of Hyperspace went smoother than expected. They suffered through a few violent shudders from the ship’s hull, but it held together. Finn immediately spotted the small planet Poe had referred to and began following the path to the coordinates he was given.

It didn’t take long for Finn to find a clear meadow to set the ship down in. And with perfect timing, as the ship began to shake non stop as soon as they entered the atmosphere. The engines all but gave out and Finn considered himself lucky that they survived the short trip. He definitely wasn’t looking forward to attempting any other potentially deadly flying missions anytime soon.

Finn exited the ship and watched the sky for Poe’s X-Wing. Within a few moments he saw the speck of a ship rapidly descending towards them. Finn rolled his eyes as Poe dramatically circled the area and landed with a little too much flare. Leave it to Poe to try and defuse a crisis with his ridiculous antics.

Poe and BB-8 were soon crossing the short distant from where he set down his ship. Without missing a beat Poe was dishing out duties to both Finn and C-3PO so they could try and fix the issue with the ship. The General hung back and watched the horizon on the ship’s scanners for any approaching ships, occasionally asking a few questions about the ship’s state.

“Finn-Okay, I think it’s good to turn the engine now,” Poe instructed Finn from the underside of the ship, with BB-8 sitting next to him giving him information on the ship. Poe was laying on his back, most of his flying gear scattered off to the side. It was a tight squeeze getting to the underside of the fuel tank and Poe didn’t need any extra bulk.

“You sure Poe? I don’t want to get you blown up under there,”

“I’ll be fine! Just flip the switch and if it doesn’t catch right away, turn it off immediately.” And after a pause, “Please.”

After quickly going back inside the ship to the control panel, Finn held his breath as he flipped the engine switch, ready to turn it back off if anything went wrong. Gratefully, the engine caught right away and was purring like it was brand new. Good to have a pilot that know his ships with us.

Finn went to go check on what else needed to be done when the General gently grabbed his arm and pulled him back.

“Be patient with Poe,” she whispered, “but don’t let him give you more excuses. He deserves to have someone that cares about him like you, even if he doesn’t think so.” She smiled kindly and winked at him. Finn must’ve imagined that, there was no way the General was trying to play matchmaker  
between them.

Now feeling extra awkward, Finn exited the ship, and saw Poe sitting with his legs crossed in front of him, examining some piece of machinery. He tried and failed miserably to not notice how perfect the pilot looked in the bright sunlight, even with grease smeared across his forearms and dirt covering the back of his once white shirt, the top of his orange flight suit tied lazily around his waist, and even the smudge of oil on the side of his forehead that went into his hairline-every mark somehow accentuated every feature of the pilot. It was wonderfully distracting in the worst way.

Poe noticed Finn standing there then turned to BB-8 whom was standing by next to the pilot. “Hey BeeBee, can you go to Black One and wait for Snap to signal us that he’s approaching?”

The white and orange Droid beeped happily in response and rolled away at top speed, always eager to please Poe.

“Can we talk about what happened back at on Coruscant?” Finn finally asked long after the Droid had been sent away. “And why you were so upset?”

“...I’d rather not,” Poe replied, in a sulking tone.

“I’m not going to ignore what happened. Or what I’m feeling, Poe.” Finn stated to the pilot, unable to look at him while trying to admit these feelings for him. “You don’t have to give me all the details but please don’t leave me in the dark... I know you felt it too.”

Still sitting on the ground, Poe began to put on his flight suit properly, taking his time to make sure each sleeve was sitting on him just right, clearly procrastinating answering Finn. Then after standing up, he finally answered quietly, “I can’t tell you Finn.”

“Why not?” Finn was getting frustrated with Poe now. “Why can’t you give me some kind of answer?”

Poe looked up at Finn, utter sadness seemed to visibly radiate from him, “If I told you what I’ve done, and who I’ve done it to,” Poe paused, taking a deep shaky breath, “Then you’d leave me. You’d never be able to look at me again and you’d leave forever and I wouldn’t be able to live with that.”

Finn could see tears in the pilot’s eyes. His hands were trembling in either fear or pain or both. Finn had never seen Poe hurting so much and couldn’t begin to fathom what haunted him this badly.

“Poe I’m so so sorry for whatever happened. But I won’t leave, I promise you that! Please let me help you with this, I’m sure I’ll eventually understand-”

“No Finn, you wouldn’t understand! Hell I don’t even understand why I did what I did!” Poe wrapped his arms around himself, like he was trying to keep himself from falling apart. “You wouldn’t be able to forgive me. Not for this… because of how I wanted him, and what I did to him…there are some things no one can forgive.”

Finn was at a loss, he had no idea how to comfort the distressed pilot from this agony he was putting himself through. Who was he talking about? And why would he need forgiveness from Finn? It’s not like his past lovers could’ve affected him, seeing as he would’ve still been with the First Order during that time. What can you say to help ease a pain that you don’t know what’s causined it?

“I’m sorry for pushing you to tell me Poe,” Finn took a cautious step forward, and when the pilot didn’t flinch back from him, he closed the gap between them. Finn wrapped his arms tightly around Poe, trying to put everything he didn’t know how to say into that gesture. “Just don’t feel like this anymore. You should never hurt like this.”

Finn only held him for a moment longer, not wanting to overstep any boundaries again, but as he pulled away, Poe caught his arm.

“I’m sorry I can’t be more,” the pilot whispered. He looked up at Finn with a look of such sadness and regret it was tearing him apart. Poe opened his mouth as if to say more, but then frowned, walking away from Finn and into the transport ship. Finn himself stayed outside, not knowing if he or the pilot needed space to try and set things right between them.

The one thing Finn did know is the he didn’t want to face Poe right now, not when he was experiencing this aching heartbreak…

Finn didn’t have much time to consider this new pain though, as he soon heard raised voices from inside the transport. As he began wondering if he should check in on what was going on he heard his name being called.

Inside Finn saw Leia hovering over Poe, who was bent over the ship’s console. Poe was listening to BB-8 from the ship’s comms while also looking over the ship’s radar system.

“What’s going on?” Finn quietly asked the General.

“There’s a ship headed towards us,” she explained. “But I don’t think it’s one of ours.”

_Not ours? I’ve got a bad feeling about this…_

“Wait what?” Poe suddenly burst out in response to whatever BB-8 was telling him. “No that can’t be right! _Tell me that’s not right!”_

Both Leia and Finn stared at Poe, he’d never heard him yell at his Droid friend like that. Then they waited impatiently while the droid beeped back his response, waiting for Poe to translate the binary droid speech for them.

“ _Fuck_ ,” Poe spat out harshly, then he immediately jumped into action, calling C-3PO back to the cockpit and then he began typing rapidly into the ship’s computer systems.

“Dameron what’s going on?” The General demanded, but not stopping him from continuing his intense typing.

“Nothing good General,” he responded under his breath. C-3PO then sauntered into the cockpit.

“Master Dameron, the ship’s systems seem to be functioning properly again but I do recommend waiting for our escort just to be sure-“

“No time for that 3PO,” Poe then shoved the Droid into the co-pilot seat. “General, it’s time to go.”

“Dameron who is that approaching us?” Leia shouted at him, needing answers. Poe slid past her, and pushed Finn out of the cockpit, but then blocked the General from exiting with them. “What makes you think we’ll be any safer off the ground?”

“General, it’s him,” Poe paused for a moment, making up his mind. “And I’ll make sure he doesn’t get to you.”

Poe then hit the outside door lock for the cockpit then locked it. Finn just stood there in shock as he listened to the General yelling at him from behind the door, and watched Poe as he made sure she couldn’t get out.

“Poe what are you doing?” Finn hissed at him, now becoming nervous himself.

Poe pushed past him and opened a small hidden compartment in the ship’s hull. The pilot reached in and pulled out two surprisingly large blasters from the tiny space. He turned and shoved one of the blasters into Finn’s hands, then grabbed Finn by his jacket with his free hand and pulled him in close.

“I need you to protect her Finn,” the Pilot eyes were intense, his voice full of barely contained passion. “At any cost, General Organa needs to survive, the Resistance will die without her! And if they catch up to you before the Resistance gets here, you do whatever needs to be done to avoid her getting captured or worse. Do you understand me?”

“Yes but-“

“I’ve rigged this ship to take off as soon s the outside airlock closes, it’ll take you straight to the Resistance base. I also sent out a message to the base to have people waiting there to help you set the ship down safely in case you’re somehow followed.”

Finn nodded in response. “But what about you? You’ll be following behind us right?”

Poe let go of Finn’s jacket and reached into his pocket. He pulled out a small memory chip and put it into Finn’s hand, making him close his fingers over it safely.

“These are the coordinates to the next backup base for the Resistance. I haven’t seen them, so I don’t know where it is,” Poe steeled himself before his next statement. “I will not betray the new location to the First Order. You’ll all be safe there.”

Finn’s eyes widened, he was beginning to understand what Poe was about to do.

“You can’t stop me, this is the only way to save you. And don’t wait for me, just get to the new base immediately. Finn I-” Poe bite his lip, stopping himself from saying whatever his next words were going to be. Finn was trying to read the emotions that sparked in the pilot’s eyes, but there wasn't enough time to sort it out. The pilot hesitated a moment longer, Finn could swear Poe began to lean in closer to his face before quickly turning away from him and walking out the transport.

“You’re still a good man, Finn,” Poe said, turning half way around to look at him one last time, a small grin back on his lips. “I’m glad it’s you who completes my last mission.”

The the pilot lifted his blaster toward the transports outer door controls. Finn yelled for him to stop the second he realized what Poe meant to do, but it was too late. Poe shot the controls and the door closed and auto locked itself.

Finn ran to the door and looked out the ship's doors viewport at Poe walking away from the ship, but not toward his X-Wing. The transport suddenly began hovering in the air and started to take off. Then Finn saw it, an evil looking black and red TIE fighter slowly descending to the planet's surface and landing in front of Poe.

Finn screamed Poe’s name over and over, knowing he couldn’t hear him but was unable to stop himself. The pilot was now walking with his arms extending out from his body, as if in surrender. Finn screamed even louder for the pilot to run and save himself.

But he kept walking toward the figure that had exited the TIE. Finn realized that Poe was going to die there, and He could do nothing to stop it from happening. Finn recognized that ship. And knew the man that piloted it.

The TIE belonged to Kylo Ren.

********

He set down his TIE Silencer, torn as he watched the ship carrying his mother and the traitor ascend into the sky, but he also had the pilot on the ground willingly walking towards him. His pilot. He had sensed the other two on this remote planet, but was pleasantly surprised to find the pilot here too. Supreme Leader would be displeased that he did not capture the two more important people first, but, Kylo now believed he could catch up with them once he had taken care of his pilot.

With a gloved finger, Kylo lightly traced the black bandage that ran down the side of his face. His unhealed wound had opened up again while training recently, so he now had this unsightly thing marring his face. Add that to the scar on his forehead and the last remains of a black eye, Kylo looked like a mess. He didn’t have his helmet with him, as it irritated his still healing face, so he couldn’t hide his battle scars from the pilot. _Oh well,_ he thought _, he might as well get used to it. Soon it’ll be the only face he’ll ever look at again…_

He swiftly climbed out of his TIE and jumped lightly to the ground. He saw the pilot carried a blaster so he immediately unholstered his lightsaber, ready in case he attacked. What surprised Kylo now though was the pilot’s state of mind. Normally a strong, well balanced conscience, the pilot’s thoughts and emotions were a swirl of chaos. Hurt, confusion, desire, need, anger, sadness, guilt, and a deep something else was what the pilot was trying to sort out in his mind right then and there.

“Can we settle this without killing each other, please?” The pilot called over the distance between them, surprising Kylo yet again by holstering his weapon and throwing his arms out wide to his sides. “I really don’t want to hurt you.”

That made Kylo smirk. No blaster could harm him when he was in single combat, the idea was ludicrous. But, Kylo was also intrigued by what the pilot had to say. All of the pilots emotions were centered around Kylo, but he couldn’t quite pinpoint what the pilot’s exact thoughts were, especially that deeper something that Kylo didn’t recognize. Kylo holstered his weapon, and dropped his hands to his sides. He waiting for his pilot to make the next move.

“I don’t want to do this anymore,” the pilot stated bluntly. “I’m done being hurt by you and I’m done with being obsessed with you.” The pilot took a couple small steps forward.

“But I don’t know how to stop,” the pilot now sounding so anguished it was affecting Kylo who was still mentally connected with him. Not wanting to become emotionally weak like the pilot, Kylo backed out of his mind.

“We’ve hurt each other so much Ben-”

“Do not call me that!” Kylo burst out, enraged that the pilot would dare to still call him that.

But the pilot just kept talking. “-and I am sick of being stuck in this endless cycle with you! And we’re not even a real _thing_ anymore!”

The pilot laughed desperately, “Did you know that I still remember every detail about those few days we had together. Kriff Ben, I remember every detail about you! Every curl of hair, how you’re eyes lit up when you laughed! Hell, I even remember every fucking freckle on the back of your shoulders! _Why_ do I remember all of that Ben?!”

Anger flared in Kylo at the use of that name again. But he stood in silence as the pilot came even closer. He was smiling weakly, his eyes betraying the pain he was clearly feeling from talking about this. Even Kylo felt a stirring of sadness and longing from those memories. He hadn’t been able to hold his focus like he should be able to since Starkiller. His emotions were unpredictable and tended to lead to even more violent outbursts than what he used to deal with. These old sentiments were hitting Kylo much harder than they should and it was beginning to worry him...

“All I want to do is forget and move on and I can’t! And when you tortured me on your Star Destroyer, I thought that might’ve been the end of it, that there was no way I could still feel anything for you after what you did. But it wasn’t, I somehow became even more consumed by every thought I had of you and by the stars I hate myself for that! Ben please-”

“That’s not my name anymore!” Kylo snarled at the pilot. He had brought up feelings that Kylo had tried to bury with the past, and now they were cutting into him again. He had enough to deal with, between Snoke’s training and punishments and trying to master himself, without adding his constant unfulfilled desires for the pilot.

“I just want to know why I feel like this for you.” The pilot was almost within arms reach now. “Why can’t I get you out of my head, Ben?”

Kylo then closed the last of the distance between them, determined to punish the pilot for his arrogant defiance and continued use of that name. Kylo put a hand around the pilot’s tender throat and pulled him in close.

“Why do you insist on using that name, pilot?” Kylo snarled, his lips pulled back over his bared teeth. “You know that’ll only make things worse for you.”

“Because that’s when I loved you,” Poe confessed, his voice shaking from the terrible truth. “I loved you, Ben.”

Kylo froze, not knowing how to react to this. Kylo had never put that idea of love into the pilot’s head, only lust and obsession. That was all Kylo had known how to make feel. Meaning that what Poe felt was real.

_He loves me?_

Kylo loosened his grip on the pilot’s throat but kept silent. He wasn’t ready to look into his own heart and see what was still there for the pilot. The weeks since his failure on Starkiller had him questioning everything about who he was and what he was to become. How would this factor into that unknown future?

The pilot brought his hand up slowly then very gently traced the outline of Kylo’s scar that ran down his face, pulling his hand away when Kylo flinched in embarrassment of his physical reminder of his failure.

“You could’ve come home with me Ben,” the pilot whispered, now caressing the unmarred side of Kylo’s face with gentleness that Kylo knew he didn’t deserve. “I could’ve forgiven you for what you did, and now…”

Kylo closed his eyes sighing in momentary defeat. He would allow himself this one moment with his pilot. He knew he would still take him prisoner and keep him for his own personal use. That would be the easier choice, abusing the pilot to help further his way towards dark side, because following Poe into the light was forever out of his reach. He was too far gone to ever be able to take that path again. But for this one moment he could pretend that everything was balanced in the galaxy and he had his pilot. His pilot that loved him.

“I’m sorry Ben,” The pilot whispered softly, causing Kylo’s heart to ache in such a way he didn’t think was possible. He had only known rage and hatred for so long, true sadness and loss was only a distant memory.

“I’m so sorry,” he whispered once more.

Unexpectedly the pilot then punched him on the side of his jaw with brute force. Kylo was dazed for a second from the surprise attack, his head swimming and he was suddenly dizzy. As he felt the blood dripping from his re-opened face wound as the pilot came in again and hit him from the other side, sending Kylo reeling back to keep his balance.

_How did I let him do this to me?!_

As the pilot swung his fist again Kylo brought up his hand faster than the pilot could follow and grabbed his wrist. As Kylo brought himself up back to his full height he twisted the pilot’s arm until he heard a resounding crack from the bone and then a satisfying shriek of pain from him.

“My pilot,” Kylo hissed, “I’m in love with these new screams,” and he twisted the broken arm even further, indulging in the painful yelling from the pilot. He then tried to force him to his knees, but defiant as ever, the pilot locked his knees and gritted his teeth, never breaking eye contact with him.

“I hope your love for me is unending, pilot, because it is about to be tested,” Kylo taunted. “You’re to become my personal prisoner and I will make sure you suffer unlike anything you’ve been through. You’ll be shackled at by my side and you will watch as I burn your Resistance and your General out of existence.”

“Leia would never fall to you!” The pilot panted through his gritted teeth. “You’re not strong enough to face her!”

Kylo ignored the pilot’s response, there was no point arguing against one of his mother's zealots. “And I’ll find the traitor that took you from me and I’ll make sure he pays for his theft! He will beg me for death long before he’s granted it!”

At that the pilot dropped a couple inches closer to the ground, “Don’t you touch Finn!” He whispered fiercely, now his anger taking a different tone.

“You named him?” Kylo asked incredulously, his anger at the protective tone of the pilot was steadily rising. “Is he your pet? We’ve trained them to be quite obedient, but we obviously didn’t domesticate FN-2187 properly.”

“Finn is a better man than you’ll ever be-Arghhh!!” The pilot screamed again as Kylo twisted his broken arm further.

“Did you replace me?” Kylo felt it again, that deep unknown emotion the pilot had been feeling-it was for the traitor?! The rage within Kylo was now barely contained. “With that traitor?”

The pilot laughed manically at that, the response surprising Kylo, his guard momentarily down.

“If Finn is a traitor that what does that make YOU?”

That statement jarred Kylo even more, his grip on the pilot’s damaged arm loosened. The pilot seized his opportunity and pulled away from Kylo. Then, with his good arm the pilot slammed his elbow into Kylo’s hip, directly hitting the still healing wound that the Wookiee had given him when he hit him with the crossbow blaster on Starkiller. Pain shot through Kylos body, his muscles tensing up from the unexpected hit, causing his knees to buckle beneath him. Before he could recover, the pilot hook his foot around the back of Kylo’s leg and kicked him forward onto his knees.

_Did he know I was injured in that exact spot too by that girl?_ Kylo thought, amazing that the pilot had hit all three of his recent wounds and effectively using them against him. He had been forced to the ground, one hand bracing himself from falling further, the other one grasping at his hip would, positive it had reopened like the now steadily bleeding gash on his face. Kylo braced himself for the pilot’s next attack, so his body would absorb it better, but it never came.

Kylo looked up to see the pilot sprinting to his X-Wing, which was already hovering inches off the ground. Yelling incoherently Kylo attempted to catch him with a Force pull but only managed to trip the pilot up for a second. He wasn’t concentrating properly. He hadn’t been able to focus the dark side of the force at his full strength ever since killing Han Solo…

Kylo quickly got up, thinking he could take out the pilot in the air. If he couldn’t have him, he would make sure no one would. He turned back and swiftly trotted back to his TIE Silencer. He quickly started it up, and looked over his short range scanner to find the X-Wing’s exact location. But before he could even begin to plan his revenge on the pilot, Kylo noticed there was a total of four starships on his scanners.

He looked into the sky and saw three blue and white X-Wings coming to the pilot’s aid. Kylo snarled, even though he had the superior speed and firepower, he did not have the defensive capabilities of the X-Wings. He might be one of the most accomplished pilots in the First Order, but he knew when he was outnumbered. He decided to cut his losses and retreat, hoping that he would get another chance to snare his pilot.

He looked longingly at the pilot’s black and orange ship one last time before taking off, defeated and and more enraged than he’d been in a long time. When he got back to the Finalizer, someone would be suffering greatly for this… 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those that have read the previous stories in this series: I couldn’t keep going without throwing a little bit of Kylo in their ;3
> 
> To those that haven’t read the first two stories in the series: surprise! Poe was in a not so great relationship with Kylo >:3
> 
> Hope you enjoyed~~


	5. Chapter 5

Phasma watched as that poor excuse for a leader, Kylo Ren, stormed across the hangar bay. He had left against the General Hux’s and hers advice, only telling them he had a feeling that he would be rewarded for his efforts. Clearly, with a temper tantrum soon coming, he hadn’t been as successful as he hoped.

Phasma respected him as a warrior and fighter. He was one of the best combatants she had ever had the privilege to witness in action. Despite that he did not have the patience or clarity to be in charge of such a large operation. Of course he was kept in check by General Hux, but with the rumors circulating about them, she couldn’t be sure that Hux would always be able to stay in control of Ren.

At least there will always be Supreme Leader Snoke at the top, keeping these children in line, she thought. Watching Kylo ignite his lightsaber she had to hold her own temper in check, she wouldn’t be doing herself any favors by Killing Snokes favorite protégée.

She soon left to go about her duties. She was confident in the fact that Ren and Hux at least wanted to find and capture the traitor nearly as bad as she did. Both of them still scouring the galaxy to find what hole he might be hiding in. It was one of the few things that kept her in line from speaking out against the Knight. That, and she did believe they wouldn’t interfere with the punishment she had planned for the runaway Stormtrooper.

*********

Kylo paced his room in a rage, impatiently waiting. He had placed his lightsaber far away from himself, not needing anything else on the ship destroyed but his approaching visitor.

_Late. He’s always late._

After another few agonizing minutes, General Hux finally stepped through Kylo’s bedroom doors. The doors had barely locked behind the General before Kylo and cross the room and backhanded the General with a resounding slap that echoed in the space.

Hux stayed planted in the same spot, his head still turned in the direction Kylo had hit him in. With Kylo panting in rage in front of him the General slowly turned his head back to face him.

“You are _not_ to hit my face again, Ren.” The General didn’t even raise his voice, Kylo thought. He’s getting smarter. And better. After Hux realised he wouldn’t get a response from him, he continued. “I’m assuming you’ve failed whatever mission you so ignorantly whisked yourself away too. You’re normally not quite this moody when you call for me.”

Kylo had to physically resist slapping the General again. As much as he dominated over Hux, he was still a willing participant. Kylo wanted to keep it that way, as Hux wasn’t nearly as satisfying when he was being forced to do anything.

“Strip down.” Kylo commanded. He needed a release, today had been too disappointing for him not to receive some sort of gratification.

The General only raised an eyebrow at him. He slowly unbuckled his belt, but made no other move to undress. Hux did enjoy tormenting Kylo, and tonight was no exception to that.

“Hurry up, General,” Kylo whispered, his voice shaking from impatience.

Hux took off one glove, placing it neatly on the edge of the bed. Then he began slowly taking off the other with his teeth. Kylo could wait no longer.

As the glove slid off the Generals slender hands Kylo grabbed him by the back of the neck then threw him up against the nearest wall. Hux didn’t even have time to protest as Kylo was already behind him, pressing himself against Hux’s ass.

Kylo immediately pulled the General's coat to the side and dug his fingers around the waistband of his black pants. As Kylo wrenched them off of his hips, the General hummed deeply in obvious pleasure. Kylo grabbed his hair and pressed his head against the wall.

“You like this, don’t you?”Kylo hissed at him.

Hux’s response was a wicked smile. He wouldn’t offer up much resistance tonight. As If he sensed how much Kylo needed this, the General arched his back, pressing himself into Kylo’s groin, inviting him in.

That simple act made Kylo even harder. He groaned as his pants pressed tight against his erection. He hated giving into the General so easily, but this release was badly needed. He threw his belt off to the side and carefully slipped his pants down.

He rested his hard cock on the small of Hux’s back, while digging into the man’s hips with his still gloved hands. The Generals sharp intake of air let Kylo know he must be leaving fresh bruises on top of the fading ones on his porcelain skin.

A twisted smile curled Kylo’s lips, Hux’s pain helped to sate his dark hunger. It was time to fully give in.

Kylo pulled his hips back enough for his cock to slide into place, then he forced his way steadily into the General, quivering in pleasure from the pressure around him and the sharp whimpers coming from the Generals throat. Kylo moved his hands up the the general’s waist and held on tightly to the smooth curve as he then began fucking the man in earnest.

Hux was able to keep himself from shouting for longer than normal, impressing Kylo. Normally the General was crying out in pleasure as soon as Kylo really started pounding into him. Not wanting the man to go unpleased, Kylo grabbed his hair, forcing his head onto Kylo shoulder, bending his back at an unnatural angle. Kylo then began fucking him upwards with renewed vigor.

The change in position did the trick. Hux was screaming for Kylo to stop and fuck him harder all at once. Kylo grabbed his throat and began squeezing it, released with the feeling of Hux’s labored breathing beneath his fingers. And now with his airway being cut off and Kylo’s dick screwing him hard, the General began to struggle to get air into his lungs. He clawed at Kylo’s hand, needing a brief release. Not wanting the General to pass out (like he had on so many other occasions), Kylo loosened his fingers, finding a new pleasure in the way the General felt on him as his chest heaved with every deep breath he took.

Deciding he got all the air he needed, Kylo clenched his hand back around Hux’s throat, this time with enough force to lift him off the ground. He walked him over to the bed before ungraciously dumping him on top of it. Before he could recover Kylo grabbed the Generals hip and flipped him onto his back.

After swiftly removing his clothes Kylo hunched over Hux, one hand on each side of his chest. Hux had managed to removed his pants and shoes, and had dropped his jacket off the side of the bed. That was more than enough for Kylo to keep enjoying him.

Hux sneered up at him, lust clearly visible in his hungry eyes. Unexpectedly Hux reached up and took a hold of Kylo’s chin, turning his head to the side to examine his poorly cleaned face. Seeing the dried blood around the reopened wound, his sneer turned into a tight frown.

“I would love to kill whomever opened up your face again,” he murmured. “That girl already marred such a work of art, and now someone else has ripped apart the canvas again. I’m immensely displeased that anyone could bear to do this to you again.”

Compliments from the General were rare, and Kylo wanted them more than he should. It was a harsh environment, living amongst the First Order, and even he admitted that this intimate praise was needed by him. It was especially needed after this day’s events.

“Tell me how you would kill him.” Kylo softly demanded, now unzipping Hux’s shirt, revealing the pale skin beneath.

“Hmmm,” The General mused, arching his chest up into Kylo’s touch. “I would start with his hands. No one that would raise a hand to this face deserves to continue using them.”

“What if I already took care of one of those hands?” Kylo leaned down to pressed his lips against Hux’s now exposed collar bone.

“If his hands are already useless then I’d go for his ribs,” Hux murmured into Kylo’s hair. “I’d try to puncture a lung. It would be most satisfying to watch this blasphemer choke on his own breath.”

Kylo’s cock twitched at the statement, Hux’s pleasure at the thought of torture was making Kylo crave him even more. His violent mind so akin to his own. He bit down on the smooth skin at the base of the Generals neck, a sign that he was please with his current mindset.

“Why a blasphemer?” Kylo asked through his teeth, biting down harder on the soft skin.

Hux gasped shakily at the suddenly sting and let out a sigh of satisfaction, “To damage you is a sin-the highest form of wrong in the eyes of the mysterious, supposed Gods.”

_Fuck_ , Kylo thought as he pushed himself irreverently back into Hux, losing himself in the General’s praises. Hux’s eloquent speech and sharp accent was the perfect tone to stroke Kylo’s ego enough for it to be believed and the Knight of Ren was relishing in it.

Kylo gripped Hux’s thighs, bruising the skin easily as he fucked him roughly. Hux screamed out at Kylo’s sudden viciousness, but a scream of pleasure and want. Too soon the General couldn’t contain it any more and came over his stomach and chest.

_The slut_ , Kylo thought, smirking at the General's lack of control. _I hadn’t even touched him yet._

> Ignoring the whimpering coming from the man, Kylo rammed himself into him faster, now wanting the feel of release himself. When he finally came inside Hux, he did so with a deep grunt and heavy sigh, enjoying the feeling but still wanting so much more.

After he pulled out from Hux, Kylo walked over to his open bathroom, grabbing a towel and wiping the sweat off of him. Hux was quickly behind him, tracing the old scars that crossed Kylo’s back, something the man often did after they finished with their activities. Hux’s fingers soon found the wound on his hip, now cracked open from their screwing and bleeding again.

“Will you tell me who did this?” Hux asked, his lips brushing Kylo’s shoulder.

Kylo thought about the defiant pilot and how he escaped his grasp yet again. Professing his love then tearing him apart before running away. Kylo didn’t think he could feel hurt like this anymore, but the pilot’s actions proved that to be wrong. While watching Hux torture the pilot might be satisfying, Kylo wanted more.

“No,” Kylo answered back. “I want to kill him myself.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bonus Kylux fun >:3
> 
> And some ominous Phasma!!
> 
> I just couldn’t resist adding a bit of my bad boys activities to this ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯


	6. Chapter 6

Finn was a mess. They had delayed leaving for as long as possible, but it was time to go. He loaded the last of the medical supplies into the cargo hold before locking it up, giving the pilot the go ahead.

How could he let this happen?

He should’ve stopped Poe. He should’ve done anything to keep the pilot on that ship and walking to his doom.

No one had been given an official reason for the evacuation, but the absence of the Resistance’s top pilot hadn’t gone unnoticed. Add in the fact that Snap still hadn’t radioed in from his flight to find Poe either, it was another dark sign that the First Order could show up at any moment.

Finn watched as the Resistance members finished piling the last of this bases items into the rest of their ships. Only one ship had taken off, scouting out the new base before everyone else arrived. The next ship was ready to leave as soon as she was here…

And as if she appeared because he thought of her, General Leia Organa walked solemnly into the hangar. She found Finn’s gaze from across the room, locking eyes with him for a long moment. She looked like how he felt; sad, miserable and hopeless. She had essentially lost not only her best fighter but also a surrogate son of sorts. And he had lost his best and first friend, and had also lost whatever sort of future they might have worked out together.

They shared a moment, though they were far apart. Both equally devastated in their own way over the loss of Poe Dameron. Whether killed or held hostage, they had no way of knowing the pilot’s fate.

Then Leia turned away, and walked onto her transport. Finn could only watch as her ship slowly made its way out of the bustling hangar and lifted off into the night sky. The rest of the Resistance would follow after they received word that she was safely in Hyperspace, but for now they continued their packing and waited.

When Finn could find nothing else to keep his hands busy, he found a quiet corner to sit in. Leia had asked him to not reveal Poe’s fate until they had left, fearing that many would want to go after him. Finn himself was dealing with a heavy guilt for that very reason. He wanted to go find him and take him back from Ren’s clutches. He had seen what the First Order did to those that opposed them and feared that Poe would most likely suffer the worst of fates. The pilot had stuck the most devastating of blows to their enemy and they would want more than just simple revenge for that.

Finn buried his face in his hands, his whole body shaking in misery. He could do nothing. His only choice was to sit and wait to hear about what happened to his friend because he lacked anything and everything needed to save him. He had never felt so hopeless, not when he was lost on Jakku, not when Rey has been kidnapped, and not when he had faced Ren with only the unfamiliar lightsaber to protect himself with. There was nothing that could be done for his friend, who most likely went down in a fight, not wanting to be tortured again at the hands of Ren.

As he sat there, alone and sick to his stomach, he played with the idea of just hiding in the base and being left behind. He had a sinking feeling that once the members of the Resistance had been told the whole story of Poe’s fate, fingers would be pointed at Finn for not doing more. Poe had been their hero, their best hope for turning the tide in this war besides the General herself. And Finn had just let him go to face his fate alone.

Finn did think he deserved the blame. He just didn’t want to have to face it when the truth came out. Was this the time to run away? When everything he wanted had been taken?

After some time with his thoughts, Finn realized that he had begun forming a plan to try and take a resistance ship for his own and get far, far away from these people that had helped him. His guilt crushed him even harder now. _When did I begin to sink this low?_ He thought. _Poe would never approve of this…_

There was a sudden flurry of shouting and movement on the far side of the hangar. Finn’s heart dropped, as this could only mean one thing: the First Order must’ve arrived.

Finn jumped up quickly, running over to the transport where he left his blaster. A new found rage swept over Finn as he grabbed the weapon and hurried to where everyone was gathering. If he was to go down with the Resistance he would make sure the First Order paid for taking his friend and stealing secrets from his mind.

But as Finn rushed to the other members,he noticed not one other member had a blaster drawn.

“What’s happening?” Finn asked the first person he approached, grabbing the man's shoulder, suddenly feeling desperate for answers.

“The message isn’t coming through clear, we’ve put up a ton of com interference since we started the evac, but,” the man hesitated, a small smile appearing. “We think Snap is returning!”

Finn’s heart leapt. _If Snap made it back alive…_

“They’ve landing in the second hangar!” A woman shouted from the crowd, a data pad in hand streaming information to her. “One X-Wing for sure, but there’s more unidentifiable ships incoming!”

There was an explosion of movement as much of the Resistance moved to check out the other bases hangar. Only one X-Wing had been confirmed, they still didn’t know what kind of ships had followed their one returning member…

As Finn and the others sprinting with him finally turned the corner into the hangar, they all had their weapons drawn, ready for whatever might be waiting for them there. They all skidded to a stop, blasters raised and at the ready.

Looking through his scope, Finn froze. While everyone else took a sigh of relief, he suddenly couldn’t breathe. He dropped his blaster, causing everyone to stare at him but he didn’t notice nor would he have cared if he did.

Before him was the familiar black and orange, one of a kind X-Wing that had become a symbol of power and skill. And carefully climbing down from that ship was the unmistakeable Poe Dameron.

_Poe’s... alive?_

Hair askew and skin pale, he looked almost as bad as he did after Ren’s torture on the Finalizer. But it was him, he was there and he was alive.

_Poe’s alive!_

While everyone around him was still scanning the skies for any other incoming ships, Finn sprinted over to the pilot, whom he thought he had lost forever. Right before Finn was within reach to grab him, Poe heard his approach and took a few steps back, holding out his left hand, stopping Finn in his tracks.

Poe had a serious look on his face, his eyes crinkled in pain. Finn noticed he cradled his right arm against his chest, and saw that it sat at a wrong angle in his sleeve.

“Poe?” Finn hesitated, worry racking through him.

“Finn, I’m sorry I left like that,” the pilot replied, his voice straining. “It was the only way I saw to save you two. All I do is destroy people, and I thought sacrificing myself might’ve been enough to save you… Please forgive me Finn, I just couldn’t stand the thought of him taking you away from me.”

Poe looked at him, tears in his eyes but the smallest smirk on his face. Finn couldn’t help himself, he couldn’t physically stay separated from the man that was going to give up everything to protect this one renegade ex-Stormtrooper. He crossed the space between them with two long strides, taking the pilot and pulling him close, careful to avoid putting pressure on the arm that was clearly broken. Poe’s eyes turned down as if in shame, but Finn but a gentle hand on the side of his face, making the pilot look at him.   
  
And it just took that one look into the pilot’s sad, but still warm eyes. Finn couldn’t stop himself as he leaned forward, bringing the Poe’s face up to his and kissed him, with as much softness and feeling as Finn could.

It was just for a short moment, Finn’s lips finally on the pilot’s. He could feel the other man's stubble scratching his chin and his chapped lips were rough against Finn’s softer ones. Slowly, Finn was the one who broke away first, suddenly terrified of the pilot’s reaction. He was clearly hurting, he might’ve just survived some awful torture at the hands of Kylo Ren, Poe was in the middle of an apology and Finn just kissed him without asking!

He looked at Poe, eyebrows furrowed in worry at what he would do. But Poe looked up at Finn, an eyebrow cocked in question with his eyes still rimmed in wetness.

“Finn, you don’t know-”

“Stop it,” Finn interrupting Poe’s protests. “I really don’t care what you think you may or may not have done in the past.” Finn stared hard at the pilot, but not unkindly. “Do you want this?”

“I don’t want to hurt you finn,” he whispered back.

Finn shook his head, dismissing the pilot’s words.

“ _Do you want this?”_

The pilot bit his lip, his eyes never leaving Finn’s. For that long second awaiting an answer from the pilot, Finn feared that he had misread him completely, that Poe did not want this at all.

But his fears disappeared when the pilot slowly nodded, his eyes still pleading with Finn to walk away but the grin that appeared invited him in.

“We’re gunna do this?” The pilot asked, wanting to hear it from Finn.

“Yeah,” Finn replied happily with a huge grin.

Finn didn’t hesitate now, locking their lips together. His heart skipped a beat when Poe kissed him back fiercely, finally letting down his guard and giving in.

They pulled apart as a small applause shocked them. Forgetting they had an audience, the Resistance members had witnessed their moment in the hangar and now cheered them, celebrating the moment and seeming to enjoy it almost as much as Finn did.

Finn pulled Poe in closer, hiding his blushing face in Poe’s dark hair, smiling at the fact that he finally getting close to those dark curls. He squeezed the pilot close feeling so lucky until Poe let out a sharp gasp of pain. Finn immediately released him, having now remembered the broken arm and the pain he must be in!

“Oh Poe I’m sorry I forgot,” He turned to the crowd still lingering behind them. “We need a Doctor! And we need to tell the General what happened!”

Finn spun around to the pilot again. “What happened out there Poe? Is the First Order on their way over? Do we need to continue the evacuation?”

Poe chuckled weakly. “Calm down soldier, we’re fine.” Poe winked at him. “We’re still a secret here, I promise.”

Finn burst into action, taking control and shouting out orders. He made sure the proper medical supplies were taken back to the medbay to treat Poe immediately. He then assigned a team to make contact with the Generals ship, she needed to know that Poe was alive and the First Order was still in the dark about their location.

In the back of his mind Finn knew there were many (if not everyone) there that outranked him, and they should be the ones making decisions. But Poe needed help now. The General needed to know the situation now. He didn’t have time for the politics of the bureaucrats taking their time on deciding what to do.

After getting confirmation that the General had definitely been contacted and that her ship was heading back, Finn could start focusing on Poe. He was lucky that they were staying at this abandoned First Order facility, because their medbay was left nearly fully supplied when the Order left. Finn did help carry a few supplies that they had intended to take off planet with them, but luckily for Poe that didn’t take terribly long with all the help they still had on base.

In no time they had x-rayed his arm, found where the break was, and had put on a proper cast to help set the arm while the meds did their work inside his bones to start mending them back together. Poe had been lucky once again, as the break in the bone had been very clean and would heal quickly. Finn was surprised the pilot hadn’t passed out from such an injury though, because Kylo had twisted his wrist nearly ninety degrees in the wrong direction.

Finn wanted to press Poe for the whole story, but after having to reset his bones and being injected with a handful of different meds and painkillers, the pilot was starting to drift off. When Finn asked what he could get him, the pilot smiled and sheepishly requested water and something to eat. Finn was more than happy to get him whatever he needed.

While he broke into the rations and started fixing a plate of the pilot’s favorites foods, Finn finally began to relax. Poe was alive. He was back here where he belonged, the First Order hadn’t gotten the location of their base, and the General was on her way back to get things resettled. Finn would be able to stay here. With Poe.

_I guess this is really home now_ , Finn thought happily. Just thinking of leaving now was so absurd Finn couldn’t believe he really considered it at one point.

_I just needed the right cause to fight for._

Finn was glad no one else in the room was looking directly at him, he was sure his dark skin would hide the blush on his cheeks and he could feel the dopey grin that was spread wide over his face. He had no idea what the future would hold for the two of them, but he had Poe now. And Finn was realizing just how inexperienced he was with this new relationship. _Are we actually together? Is he my boyfriend now?_

He shook his head. He may have gotten a positive response from Poe for now, but he had a lot to learn when it came to actually being in a relationship. It’s not like the First Order prompted any sort of mingling amongst the troopers, considering it was forbidden and all.

While still musing about his new future and Poe, Finn gathered up the small meal he prepared and headed back towards the medbay. He avoided the people running cargo back to its proper place, everyone excited they got to stay in this highly advanced base for a little longer. A few people winked or congratulated Finn as he passed and he couldn’t help but keep grinning like a fool, still in partial disbelief in the fact that Poe said yes to him.

Upon reaching the medbay, the first thing Finn saw was Poe sitting up on the edge on his bed alone. This side of the room was covered in a long one way mirror, so Finn could see in, but poe would have no idea he was there. It was most likely used by the First Order officers to determine whether it was worth saving a dying or injured trooper without having to get up close to them.

Finn shook the thought of the Order away and watched the pilot for a moment. His pilot. Despite his painful adventure and escape, Poe had a small smile on his face as he fidgeted with his newly fitted cast.

_I don’t think he’s regretting this_ , Finn thought happily.

The door on the opposite wall of Finn slide open as he stood there, and instead of a doctor or nurse coming in to check on Poe, it was General Organa! She got back quicker than Finn thought she’d be able too.

Her face was unreadable, mostly likely a combination of surprise and exasperation at the pilot’s actions. But as she marched up to him she didn’t embrace Poe but suddenly slapped him across the face, the skin on skin sound reverberating in Finn’s ears. Finn gasped and nearly dropped the tray of food he carried. What was she doing?

“Hey-“ Poe began to protest but was immediately cut off.

“How _dare_ you,” her voice barely more than a whisper but Finn could still hear her clearly through the glass. “How could you, Dameron. Do you understand the gravity of what you did?”

“I was trying to save you General I couldn’t just-”

“You could have!” She growled back at him. “Do you truly not understand what you mean to this Resistance? Who you are supposed to become for it? The galaxy would fall if you were captured by them Dameron!”

Poe shook his head but didn’t dare interrupt her.

“I won’t be around forever! That’s what I’ve been telling you for years! You’re the new face of this Resistance, the only one that I can trust to continue the fight for the right reasons! Poe I need you here and alive to lead when I can’t!”

Poe looked like he was about to respond when the General flung her arms around him, surprising both Poe and Finn. She was not one for outbursts of physical contact.

“I already lost my son and Han to Kylo Ren,” she said, barely holding back a sob. “I can’t lose another son to him. I can’t let him take you away from me like he’s taken everyone else I’ve loved.”

Finn had to look away from this private moment. The brief look he saw on Poe’s face was heartbreaking. He never meant to hurt her in that way and it would tear him apart now knowing what he nearly did.

After a moment Finn looked back in the room. The General had moved to the pilot’s side and was now asking him about his arm. Finn took a deep breath and tried to do his best to act as if he hadn’t just seen the General announce to Poe that she wanted him as her predecessor and viewed him as her own son. No big deal.

Both of them looked up at Finn when he walked in. The General gave him a sly smile and Poe perked up immediately.

“Here ya go Poe,” Finn said as he laid the tray now on his bedside. “It really does loolike you could use something to eat, you’re still pretty pale from resetting that arm.”

Poe didn’t need to be told twice, as he immediately began to pick up items off the tray.

“Good to see you again Finn,” the General nodded at him, her smile becoming more mischievous. “I’ve heard rumor from around the base that you’ll be officially joining the Resistance and staying with us long term?”

She ended her question with a wink. Finn looked down at Poe who smiled and shrugged. “I won’t make ya do anything you don’t wanna do but, I kinda assumed.”

“I supposed I've found a reason to fight,” Finn replied, his statement sounding cliche even to himself. “I don’t think I ever really planned on leaving, to be honest. I can’t imagine just walking away.”

Finn leaned against Poe’s side and was pleased when the pilot leaned back onto him. The General rolled her eyes at the two of them in a dramatic fashion and sighed heavily.

“Doctor says your arm will be good as new in three days Dameron, and that also happens to be when we send out Finn’s messages to the First Order. We don’t know what their response or retaliations might be so take these next few days to,” She paused, shook her head playfully. “-to do whatever. But I expect both of you to be ready for anything the day the message goes out.”

She nodded sharply at them, but gave them a smile and a wink before exiting the room, leaving the two men alone.

They both glanced at eachother, Poe smiled and Finn laughed awkwardly, not knowing what to say now they they didn’t have an audience.

“So how do you-”

“What exactly are-”

They both starting speaking at the same time, talking over each other then laughing at their timing.

Poe cleared his throat. “Alright Finn, I’ll admit to you, I’ve been out of this whole relationship game for a bit,”

Finn laughed at that, “Don't worry, you’ve still got a head start compared to me who hasn’t been in this ‘relationship game’ ever.”

“You got me there,” Poe admitted, now playing with the small apple in his hand. “Okay, I’m just going to come out and say it: this might be a little weird getting used to for the both of us. So, why don’t we try and take all this slow, not that I’m not excited, but just so we don’t screw this up too early on?”

“Yeah of course,” Finn answered, secretly relieved that he wasn’t expected to… Well he really didn’t know what exactly he was expected to do with this to be honest.

“You look concerned Finn,” Poe pointed out, reading him easily.

“This is all a bit new for me,” he said nervously. “I really don’t know what you’re expecting of me of or what exactly this is and-” Finn covered his face with his hands. “I really didn’t think this through, I have no idea what I’m doing.”

Finn could tell that Poe was trying to not laugh at him.

“Listen Finn, it’s pretty simple. Well call ourselves exclusive, so no kissing other guys. Or girls.”

“Easy enough,” Finn smirked

“You and I will try and spend even more one together, really learn about one another and figure out someday where we wanna take this if it keeps working. And if you’re alright with it,” Poe took Finn’s hand in his good one. “I think I’ll call you my boyfriend now.”

Finn leaned in and kissed Poe again, elated that he could do so freely. Yes, he was very much alright with that.

 


	7. Chapter 7

“Poe were late, again! Hurry it up!” Finn was jogging after BB-8 who was leading the way to hangar. Poe was trailing behind them and laughing at Finn’s need to be punctual.

“Finn calm down it’s just a briefing!” The pilot shouted after him. “It’s not even for one of our missions!”

Finn shot the pilot a narrow eyed look over his shoulder. He had just been given permission to assemble and lead a team of his own ground forces in the Resistance and he needed to look like he was involved in all of the missions, even if he wasn’t carrying them out. Not everyone could be like Commander Dameron and just show up only when he was specifically needed.

The past few months for the pair had been a mixture of relaxing bliss and exhilarating action. From the moment Finn’s statements were broadcast into the First Orders comm systems there had been a huge shift in the war. On one hand, stormtrooper deflectors were being reported from multiple known First Order facilities, meaning that his message had worked! On the other hand, the First Order has responded with cruel efficiency, now publicly executing any defectors that were caught, causing much of their efforts to be in vain.

But none of this stopped the Resistance. They braced themselves for a fight, ready to face the enemy head on. And out of nowhere, the bulk of the First Order seemed to disappear. Yes they still saw Hux’s and Phasma’s propaganda and there were still small fights between them. But the majority of their ships and military couldn’t be found, and that caught everyone off guard.

Where were they hiding? The First Order was still the largest military presence in the galaxy after the loss of the New Republic. And what was frightening was that even though no one could seem to locate where they were, the First Order se still showedup to cause trouble constantly before disappearing once again.

This meeting they were running to was just another routine summary of where they have and haven’t scouted and ideas on where to look next. Poe had been off of scouting flights for ages, and they didn’t require Finn’s ground team, but Finn wanted to prove himself a worthy leader.

When they did arrive the whole discussion went on exactly as Poe described it would. The leaders talked themselves in circles and ending up picking nearly random spots on the galaxy map to go check out. Without and solid leads for weeks, there wasn’t much else they could do.

Everyone left as soon as they were dismissed, with only Finn and Poe hanging behind in the hangar.

“I told you we weren’t needed,” Poe smirked at Finn, arms crossed against his chest. We could’ve done a hundred other things rather than listen to this First Order guessing game.”

“What else did you plan on doing?” Finn asked suspiciously. On the many free days the two of them had, Poe usually spent his time working on his X-Wing or was out flying it. He didn’t usually have much work planned.

“You.” The pilot replied simply with a shrug and a smirk.

It took Finn a moment to register exactly what the pilot meant. When his eyes went wide as he understood the pilot’s meaning, Poe raised his hands and laughed embarrassed. “I’m sorry that was inappropriate.”

Finn swept the hangar with his eyes, making sure they were alone before grabbing the pilot’s wrists and dragging him closer.

“I like it when you’re inappropriate,” Finn said in a low tone, his mouth just inches from the pilot’s now.

“You would,” Poe breathed back, his usually defiant and joking tone was never quite as intense when he was wrapped in Finn’s arms. And Finn loved that this was all it took to disarm the quick-witted pilot.

Finn leaned down and deeply kissed the pilot. _His_ pilot. Over the few months they’ve had together Finn had come to love the now familiar feel of Poe’s lips on his, the scratch of his always present stubble, the taste of his warm breath as Poe smiled and laughed softly with almost every embrace the two shared.

Finn dropped his hands to the pilot’s hips, trying to pull him even closer, needing to feel every inch of him. He felts Poe’s lips curl into a smile in response. Even with the war going on and the constant uncertainty of his future, Finn couldn’t imagine being any happier than this. With his pilot.

Almost without realizing he was doing it, Finn slipped a hand under the pilot’s shirt, his thumb running along the smooth skin of the pilot’s hip and then gripping it tight. Poe moaned at that, a low, deep sound that Finn craved to hear more of. His other hand found its way under the shirt, now sliding along the small of the pilot’s back, fingertips just barely edging under the pilot’s waistband, searching and wanting more. Finn slowly starting dipping his hand down lower-

-then Poe pushed away from him. Like he had so many times before.

The pilot shook his head. His cheeks were flushed and eyes wide, and even in this awkward situation he was grinning uncontrollably.

“Sorry Finn, just-” Poe blew out a long breath of air. “-just still not sure. Not of you!” Poe added quickly. “Not sure of myself!”

It was an excuse Finn had heard over and over again. Whatever Poe did in his past was holding him back from Finn. And Finn was always understanding, as much as he could be with being kept in the dark about it. But lately, Poe’s secrecy had begun to sting a bit. It was beginning to feel more like he didn’t trust Finn, instead of himself.

Finn pursed his lips and kept his thoughts to himself. If Poe said he wasn’t sure, Finn was just going to have to go along with that.

“I’m sorry,” Poe said weakly.

Finn just shrugged. “It’s fine.” He half smiled at his pilot. “I’m fine. You just gotta do whatever you feel comfortable with.”

“Finn it’s not that exactly-” Poe started, but still not finding the words to explain the situation so Finn would understand.

“Poe, I get that you’re dealing with some demons from your past but, can you please just try to trust in me? Just a little? I’m really not going anywhere and I wish you’d believe me.” Finn sighed, Poe looked devastated as he listened to the outburst. Now upset with himself for making a big deal out of it, Finn wished he kept his mouth shut. He didn’t like causing friction between the two of them.

Not like it was the first time though.

Whatever Poe was struggling with, it didn’t seem to be getting any better. Particularly in the past month, Finn had become bolder, and more comfortable with Poe, leading his hands and lips to start exploring. The pilot too had become more forward, and Finn had took this as a good thing, a sign that their relationship was strong and stable, possibly even ready to start taking small steps to the next level. Very small steps. Finn was obviously still inexperienced when it came to the physical and sexual parts of the relationship, but he wanted to explore this with Poe. But anytime either of them started to head down that road, Poe disconnected, apologized and went uncharacteristically quiet for a time.

Finn hated that he was becoming so frustrated with the situation, but they had been through this so many times. He wanted to be patient and give Poe all the time he needed to come to terms with his past, but Finn couldn’t just lie and say it didn’t bother him.

Finn took a deep breath, and tried putting it behind him. “Sorry. It’s fine, Poe.” Finn took him by the hand and squeezed it. “Whenever you’re ready.”

Hand in hand, Finn lead them out of the hanger and towards the base’s mess hall where lunch would be starting soon. Normally at this point after one of these ‘instances’ Poe would be babbling about one thing or another to try and diffuse the awkwardness with random talk or he’d become depressed and walk away, Finn not being able to find him for hours.

But today he was different, noticeably so. Poe’s brows were slightly furrowed, as if deep in thought. It was odd because Poe always thought out loud, constantly voicing his thoughts until an idea was clear or plans completely fleshed out. Others on the base rolled their eyes at Poe saying that he just enjoyed the sound of his own voice, but Finn always found it to be a wonderful insight into the pilot’s mind.

Finn had soon learned how accomplished of a leader he was, his seemingly simple plans turning out incredibly complex and always able to baffle the enemy. And when it came to thinking on their feet, no one was quicker than Poe, which made him an ideal, if not a reckless, problem solver.

Finn shrugged it off and let his pilot be, preferring this pensive Poe over the miserable Poe he could’ve been after this most recent incident.

While they ate, they were joined by Poe’s (and being honest, now Finn’s too) pilot friends. They all joked and laughed together, everyone enjoying the much needed bit of relaxation that they got with the First Order currently being MIA. Too many had been lost after the attack on Starkiller and while no one said it out loud, they weren’t eager to jump into the fight and see more friends lost.

“Hey Poe,” Pava called out from across the table at the still quiet pilot. “Did you short circuit or something? I haven’t seen you this quiet since the last time I caught you and Big Deal over in the-”

“Jess do you need to bring that up again?” Finn interrupted, still embarrassed at her walking in on them while they may have been making out in a dark corner of the hangar behind his X-Wing.

She shrugged, “It's not my fault you two can’t seem to find your own rooms,”

Poe just laughed softly and shook his head, “Sorry Pava, I can't help it if Finn shows up right after I’ve seen a little action in my ship. You know how excited flying can get,” Poe wagged his eyebrows lewdly, causing Pava and the others to laugh or make fake gagging sounds.

Poe just turned his head towards Finn and winked. Finn smiled in return, glad to see that whatever was going on in the pilot’s mind wasn’t stopping his sense of humor.

********

Later in the afternoon, the couple spent sometime in the base’s surprisingly vast library that had been left over by the First Order. While Poe quietly walked along the screens and tables, Finn downloaded more literature and histories onto his private datapad. He had recently finished reading an exciting tale from the Clone Wars, told through the eyes of a Rodian Senator that had lived through it.

Since being given the freedom to do what he wished during his free time, Finn found a love of reading and learning. He only knew the galaxies histories through the filter of the First Order and was determined to see the universe through a wider view. After he had made enough selections to keep him busy for at least a couple nights, he and Poe retreated to Poe’s room for the evening.

While adhering to Poe’s ‘taking it slow’ request, they still had their individual rooms that they slept in, but spent nearly every night up until that point in the pilot’s quarters. He had a much larger space for them to spread out in, and that’s where BB-8’s charging base was, and the Droid did not like being left out if it could avoid it, even if it was just quietly charging in its base like it was tonight.

Finn was sitting comfortably against the beds headboard his datapad in one hand, with Poe’s head laying in his lap while the pilot messed around on his datapad, testing himself on a flying simulator. One of Finn’s hands started running through Poe’s hair while he was engrossed in a story about the Rebel Alliance and their fight on Endor as they attempted to take down the shields that protected the second Death Star. It was fascinating to read about how legends that he had met like Han Solo and General Organa had carved their names into the galaxy forever.

As he read, a thought occurred to Finn: who was everyone else that was involved? It couldn’t have just been the four heros that seemed to be the only ones ever mentioned.

“Poe?”

“Hmm?”

“You said your dad fought in the Rebellion,” Finn started. “Did he fight on Endor?”  
  
Poe lowered his holopad and looked up at Finn with a grin. “He did. Served as a pathfinder under Solo himself. He was part of the team that brought down the shield generator! Even after the Death Star was destroyed, he and the other pathfinders kept fighting, making sure the Imperial forces had been completely removed from Endor, even though him and my mom had only just found out that they both survived the battle.”

“And your mom, Shara, she flew with green squadron?” He asked, genuinely wanting to hear more about Poe’s parents.

“That she did,” Poe answered, sitting himself up so he was leaning against Finn’s chest now. “Not to brag but she was easily the best A-Wing pilot the Rebels had. She was so good that after the Empire's defeat, if Solo was off on a mission of his own, my mother was General Organa’s personal pilot. She flew her all around the galaxy to help restore peace after the emperor went down with his battle station.”

The pilot paused for a moment, “They told me all sorts of stories from their time with the Rebellion, the fights and the adventures and their sacrifices. They really did inspire me to try and become better to continue to help the galaxy… I’m just glad I’ve got pieces of both of them with me all the time to remind me of why I keep doing what I do.”

Curious, finn asked, “What do you keep with you of theirs?”

“Well, my jacket used to be my dads,” he pointed to the dark leather jacket that hung off the back of his door. “He wore that through most of the war, and I’m proud to wear it during my fight now.”

Poe then pointed to Finn’s jacket hanging next to his. “Then there’s your jacket. The leather was taken from the seat of my mom's retired A-Wing, the same ship that she taught me how to fly in. Dad had it made for me after she died once he knew I’d be a pilot like her, so it was almost like she’d still be flying with me.”

Tears suddenly stung Finn’s eyes, his chest tight with unexpected emotions after Poe told the short story.

“Poe, why would you ever let me have that jacket?” Finn asked, baffled that something so clearly important to the pilot was handed over to a nobody like himself.

Poe shrugged, settling himself against Finn more comfortably. “That jacket has always given me a bit of courage when I needed it most. Seeing it on you gave hope as well. Hope not just for me, but for you and your future too… besides it’s not like it matters anymore,” Poe looked over his shoulder back at Finn. “Now that I’ve got you, the jacket will still be with me all the time.”

Finn felt as of his heart would burst at the pilot’s words. He wrapped his arms around his pilot and hugged him close, trying to put so many unspoken feelings into the gesture. Finn kissed the side d Poe’s neck.

“Poe, I love you,” he murmured against the warm skin.

At the words Finn hadn’t planned on saying, the both tensed.

 _I just said that I loved him,_ Finn panicked. _Is it too soon? Does he feel the same?!_

“Do.. do you really love me Finn?” Poe asked, an unfamiliar heavy weight to his words.

Finn slowly nodded his head against the pilot’s neck, afraid if he spoke the words again Poe might take off.

Finn sighed internally when he felt Poe’s body relax under his arms, the pilot settling himself against Finn’s chest once again. He kept his arms around Poe, finding comfort in the act while still unsure of what he should say or do next.

It was Poe that ended up breaking the silence.

“Do you really want to know me, Finn?” He asked, voice hushed. “Know what I’ve done and why I’m still so scared of hurting you? Because if you love me now,” Poe voice wavered slightly. “I don’t think you’ll love me when I’m done.”

Finn wrapped his arms tighter around his pilot, trying to reassure him through touch.

“You can tell me everything, Poe,” Finn wished he could see his face.

The pilot was silent for a bit, gathering his thoughts.

“Do you remember when I told you about Muran?” He asked.

“Of course,” Finn wasn’t likely to forget the story. Muran had been Poe’s first love and partner, they flew together under the New Republic. Poe believe that it had been his bad call and reckless need for action that got Muran killed. Finn knew that it was really the First Order that took down the man, but Poe couldn’t stop blaming himself. Finn didn’t find himself jealous of the man, but a sympathy for the loss of life at such a young age when he had such a hopeful future ahead of him.

“That’s where this starts. Heartbroken, angry, and more than ready for a fight I was thrilled when Leia offered me a place in the Resistance. She sympathized with my need to bring down the First Order. She promised me that working with her would be the best way truly restore peace to the galaxy. I accepted her offer and almost immediately flew off to their secret base.

“And that’s when I saw him for the first time. That’s when I met Ben Solo.”

Even though Finn told himself he wouldn’t react no matter how insane Poe’s story ended up being, he involuntarily stiffened at that name.

While on Starkiller, he and Rey witnessed Han Solo approaching Kylo Ren, and it was revealed to them both that Kylo was his son. He had only brought it up once since then, quietly asking Poe if that meant that Kylo Ren was also Leia's son. Poe had responded with a solemn nod, and only asked Finn to not repeat the fact around the base, fearing that it could cause issues within the Resistance. In Finn’s mind, he still saw Kylo as a bastardized son of pure evil, not human enough to have parents. To Finn, the closest thing Leia had to a son was Poe, simple as that. No one else.

Finn did his best to relax. So far this story only included Kylo… or Ben Solo. There still could be a chance that the story wasn’t about him.

Poe picked up his story again. “He was a quiet kid… and when I say kid he was really only a few years my younger. But he was inexperienced, sheltered, he hadn’t been out to really see the galaxy for himself. So I did think of him as a kid, at least compared to what I had done and seen by his age…

“Like I was saying though, he was quiet. Tall and lanky, the son of a Princess and war hero, he was incredibly intelligent but could also be arrogant which further separated him from other people. Add in the fact that he was incredibly powerful in the ways of the Force without having formal training yet, alienated him more. There had been rumors circulating that Luke, or maybe Leia, didn’t want him to train. So at seventeen he was a sheltered outcast that was clearly destined to do great things. And when I saw him, before even speaking to him I knew he was different. And I liked that…”

Poe turned his head to the side, almost looking at Finn.

“I’ve always had a thing for different,” The pilot quietly chuckled, squeezing Finn’s hand that was still wrapped around his waist.

“But I let him be. I was given so many missions when I first arrived at the base I didn’t have time to do anything but eat, sleep, then fly off again. Plus, I’ll admit I was still heartbroken over Muran, his death weighed heavily on my mind and pushed me to try and do more for the cause. I wasn’t ready to jump into anything new.”

Poe paused, taking a shaky breath.

“Then one night things changed. I’ll admit the mission I had just returned from had got me amped up, and when I’ve got that adrenaline running through me I can be even more unpredictable than usual. It was late, and Ben just happened to be there, almost as if he had been waiting for me cross his path. There was a sudden desperation about him that hadn’t been there the last time we spoke, and while I didn’t know it at the time, his days were limited on the base. I think that’s why he was so bold.

“It happened quickly. He pulled me into his room, practically throwing himself at me. I won’t lie and say I hadn’t been tempted by him, but I wasn’t ready for that. Every thought in my head screamed for me to stop, to walk away, to cool off. But then my body just went with it. I’ve never lost control of myself like that. I come across as a flirt but I tend to not give it all up on the first night, ya know? But for Ben I did. I can’t really remember what I was thinking, only that he said to take him and I eagerly complied with the request...”

“Don’t let me go Finn,” Poe whispered suddenly. Finn hadn’t realized that his arms had loosened around the pilot during the story, nearly falling to his sides. “Please just hold on until the end.”

He wrapped the pilot up again, pressing him up against his chest and kissed the back of his neck. He hoped that comforted Poe some and gave him the strength to keep talking.

“Waking up the next morning in the unfamiliar room with Ben Solo curled up next to me was a shock.” He laughed nervously. “I wasn’t that kind of guy, I didn't sleep around like that but I know I didn’t have plans for a relationship. I crept out of the bed and got out of the room as quick as I could, running back to my own, confused and ashamed. I had no idea what possessed me to loose my self control and just give in to physical wants like that!”

“So, you letting him down and leaving? Is that what hurt him?” Finn asked softly after Poe had gone quiet for many minutes.

Poe snorted. “I wish that’s what I had done, just walked away from him. But I didn’t. I did the opposite. I felt honour bound to try and make something out of this so I wouldn’t feel guilty over what I had done and so Ben wouldn’t feel like he’d been used by me.

“And that’s I tried to do. Ben was more than eager to see what being a couple would be like. We spent a short time together, I tried to figure out who he was and what he wanted to be. I hate admitting it Finn, but I even had _fun_ with him. I enjoyed Ben Solo’s company despite his moodiness and and his entitled attitude. I really thought that something good was coming out of my moment of weakness.”

Poe then laughed that haunted, hollow laugh that Finn had heard before. It was a sound that reflected the pilot’s inner turmoil, a man on the verge of breaking, and somehow this attempt at laughter was the only thing keeping him from falling apart completely.

Finn kept close to the pilot, letting him know that he was still there with him. He was having trouble processing these events but was determined to hear Poe out until the end. He squeezed his hands reassuringly.

“Everything came crashing down real quick after that. Turns out Ben had a few secrets that he decided not to divulge and I was pretty torn up about it. He had been told that Luke Skywalker was on his was to the base to retrieve him, so he could start his Jedi training officially. He knew he was leaving, probably long term, and he deliberately did not tell me for fear that I wouldn’t pursue this if I knew there wouldn’t be a near future for us. He lied so easily to me about it and finding that out hurt.

“I was crushed and upset. Really upset. Words were exchanged between us and I basically told him to screw off, that there wasn’t any point in him sticking around if I couldn’t trust him. I stormed away and locked myself in my room, trying to figure all this out. What I wanted from it. I was realizing just how hard I had fallen for him and I felt like a fool, especially with the irony of the nickname I gave him... I called him _heartbreaker_ ….”

“Then he came back. I wish he hadn’t. If he had just given me the night alone I know I would’ve calmed down, forgiven him, maybe even taken him back and we would’ve avoided what happened…”

Poe had started to tremble with every breath. He was tense and his voice had become low and unsteady. Finn could feel the story coming to the part that Poe was having trouble letting go after all these years.

“It was the middle of the night, I was still up, still upset when Ben knocked on my door. And despite all that, being the guy that I am, I let him in to hear him out. Regardless of how I felt I wouldn’t just ignore an apology…

“He wanted me back. After telling him no he made his advances. I started to push back, I wasn’t going to just say yes because he asked and then--”

The pilot’s voice caught in his throat. Finn could feel his muscles tensing up. Poe shuddered before carrying on.

“I honestly don’t remember the snap. The moment whatever switch in my head turned off is lost but I can remember what I did. I grabbed Ben, and the things I did to him… I felt like an animal, just tearing through him. I don’t know if it was rage or lust, but whatever drove me to do that is nothing I had ever felt before. Fuck, even in my darkest fantasies I couldn’t imagine doing anything like that to someone who wasn’t asking for it--it’s just not who I am! And he suffered because of it, Finn! I hurt him so badly! I can still see the bruises on his skin, the deep cuts on his neck, his blood under my fingernails! It didn’t matter that he lied to me, no one deserved that punishment! No one should ever have to suffer again for my lack of control!”

Poe buried his face in his hands, a dry sob escaping him.

“Then after… I swear it was an accident Finn! He wouldn’t leave and I pushed him away. I don’t know if I just underestimated my strength but he fell onto my desk, his head cut wide open. He called me out for being exactly what I knew I was; selfish, impulsive… dangerous…”

“Then he was gone. He took off and I didn’t come to my senses quick enough to follow right away. I did go looking for him but it was too late. He had a head start and knew the base better than me. He was nowhere. I only found out where Ben was when I saw Skywalker’s ship flying out of the hangar and then out of sight.

“I sent him so many messages, then gave them to the General to send to the secret Jedi temple he was training at, hoping that he’d reply. But he never did. All I wanted to do was apologize. And when I finally did see him again years later, it was too late.”

Finn softly gasped, “Do you mean, the next time you spoke to him was when you were on the Finalizer?”

Poe nodded. “I was one of the very, very few who knew that Kylo Ren was really Ben Solo. When I saw him on Jakku I did try to kill him. He deserved that for all the destruction he’d caused, and I held onto a bitter anger that Ben Solo had turned to the First Order and became this masked devil. But you saw what happened, a single blaster bolt was no match for him, and I was dragged off onto his ship. And on the Finalizer,” Poe shook his head. “I’ll spare you the details of what he did to me, but I’m positive it wasn’t the same type of torture techniques he would normally use…”

Finn’s eyes widened at the realization of what Poe meant. “Do you mean he-?”

Poe cut him off. “He took advantage of me, had his way with me, say it however you like. But that wasn’t even the worst part Finn,” Poe laughed his hollow laugh again, sounding like a madman on the verge of hysteria.

“The worst part is that even after everything I did--no, after everything he did: the murder of the younglings and adults at the Jedi temple, joining the First Order, him forcing himself on me and then tearing through my mind like it was nothing--!”

Poe took a deep breath.

“The worst part is that _I loved him_ Finn. I still wanted to be with him. I couldn’t hate the man who was literally trying to destroy everything I was trying to save. I loved the man who wanted me as a pet, to sit loyally at his side and please him at his whim. I didn’t sleep almost every night because of this knowledge, _fuck,_ I still don’t sleep because of it!”

Poe leaned heavily into Finn’s chest, his hands holding onto Finn’s as if he felt that he was going to disappear if he let go.

“And then there was you,” Poe stated, his voice now softer.

“You gave me hope Finn. All those years after I had been with Ben, about thirteen or so, I had been completely alone. I didn’t deserve to be with anyone if my heart was capable of loving such a monster. But when I talked to you I felt hope for myself, that maybe I didn’t have to live in solitude… and it was also you that somehow broke my need for Ben Solo. The moment I saw the jagged wound he tore into your back, whatever part of me held onto Ben suddenly shattered. There was nothing that I wanted in that moment except to hear your voice, and to make sure Kylo Ren never touched you again.”

“I’ve wanted you for a long time Finn,” Poe confessed. “The first time I saw your face and heard you speak there was a spark. I didn’t realize what it was at the time, seeing as how I was just tortured and some renegade stormtrooper claimed he wanted to rescue me, but it soon became clear to me that the spark turned into a fiery need. But I can’t help but think that I could lose control again, that I might turn into something I’m not and…”

He paused briefly and added, “And that’s my story. The door is over there when you're ready to walk away from this.”

Finn made a noise of disgust, “Just hold on Poe, I’m not going anywhere. I just need a second to process this.”

Then they both sat there in silence. Finn was in disbelief. No matter how much he prepared himself for this, he really could never have been ready for the truth. _Poe, his Poe, was once in love with Kylo Ren?!_

 _No no,_ Finn corrected himself _. He loved Ben Solo. They’re two different people now._

And his heart ached thinking about all the pain the pilot must’ve been through. The guilt that he’d been carrying must’ve been crippling at times. Then there was the torture on the Finalizer. Finn shuttered, he couldn’t even begin to imagine the kind of power and control Ren had over his pilot when he was locked away in that cold room. And it hit Finn suddenly: didn’t Poe just face Ren again recently? The broken arm he received now seemed like a very minor injury compared to what Ren might’ve done had he been successful in capturing Poe…

“Hey,” Poe nervously started, pulling Finn out of his own thoughts. “Sending out an S.O.S. here buddy.” He let out a shaky panicked laugh. “My heads a mess trying to figure out what you're thinking about me now…”

Finn chose his words carefully, but was honest with Poe.

“It’s hard imagining that after all that’s happened to you, and all that you’ve been through, that you’re still Poe Dameron.”

For the first time since starting his story Poe turned his head to look at Finn. His red rimmed eyes were confused, an eyebrow cocked in question.

“A lesser man would’ve broke and gave up. Maybe even turned to the dark side like Ren did. But you stayed here, true to yourself, and kept fighting.” Finn kissed him on the cheek. “I truly admire you Poe. For still being here and for telling me the truth.”

“But I-“ Poe sputtered. “I was involved with--with him! With _Kylo Ren_!” Poe early choked on those last few words.

Finn shook his head. “You were involved with Ben Solo, a seemingly decent teen that needed up making horrible choices. That’s not your fault.”

“But Finn, I think I might've been the one who pushed in too far over, that it’s my fault he went down that path!”

“You really do think highly of yourself, Dameron,” he teased, “Ren isn’t a monster because of you. I have no way of knowing what his past was, but anytime spent with you was his opportunity to stay and make the choice to fight for the right side. You maybe be reckless and dangerous, but you do these things only to help others.”

“But what I did to him-“

“That couldn’t have been all you,” Finn cut in. “I refuse to believe that he didn’t have some sort of influence over you with his Force powers. That what he does, Poe. He gets into peoples heads and messes with them. Can you honestly say you remember every thought of yours when you were with him? You even said you couldn’t remember what you were thinking! Didn’t you ever consider that part of the reason for that was because of Ren?”

Finn took Poe by the shoulders, forcing him to turn around so he could really see him.

“I know you Poe,” Finn smiled. “And regardless of what you may or may not have done in your past, I still love you.”

Poe expression was unreadable, too many emotions were conflicting together on his face. After a moment though, Poe fixed Finn with stare of disbelief and relief. He shrugged to himself, “I’ll admit Finn, I’m at a loss for words. I was planning on begging you stay, maybe spouting apologies all night, hell I was even prepared to defend myself if you were so upset that you needed to beat me to a pulp--but this, this I was not ready for…”

He trailed off into silence, and leaned onto Finn again. He easily wrapped the pilot in his arms and repositioned themselves so they were laying down in the bed.

“Like I said,” he whispered to his pilot, “I’m not going anywhere.”

He felt and heard Poe let out a deep shuddering breath as if he hadn’t been breathing properly during his tale. Finn pressed his lips against the pilot’s head, and the two of them stayed there like that, holding onto each other until eventually Finn drifted off to rhythm of Poe’s slow breathing…

Finn woke to a dark unfamiliar room. As he rubbed his eyes he remembered that he had fallen asleep next to his pilot and turned to see that Poe was up as well, sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Poe?” Finn whispered softly, not wanting to startle him.

Poe turned and Finn could see him smile as his eyes adjusted to the dark. He laid back down and scooted close to Finn.

“I’m sorry, I hope I didn’t wake you. Couldn’t sleep with all my day clothes on,”

Finn shook his head, realizing that he had fallen asleep fully clothed too. The uncomfortable attire was what most likely woke him up now that he thought about it.

Finn shook his head and murmured, “Nah you’re fine, just uncomfortable,” he sat up and clumsily pulled off the thick pants he wore and dumped them off the side of the bed. His heavy weave shirt soon followed. As he settled back down in bed it was only then that he realized that the pilot too was stripped down only to a pair of dark colored boxers. And that the nearly naked pilot was also staring at him in the most peculiar way.

“What?” Finn asked, now suddenly feeling exposed under Poe’s stare.

“This isn’t how I planned out first night together,” he chuckled. “With me confessing my sins and nearly breaking down into pieces then needing to be held onto in order to keep myself from running away.”

“Oh,” Finn replied lamely, sleep still clouding his brain. “What did you have planned then?”

Poe lifted himself halfway up and then crawled on top of Finn. He used one elbow to prop himself on the bed as to not put his full weight onto Finn, then he cradled the side of Finn’s face with his other hand as he began to kiss him fiercely.

Almost immediately the last bits of drowsiness dissolved and Finn was fully awake. He eagerly returned the kiss, letting his hands explore the pilot’s broad shoulders and muscled back. Poe was seeming to urge Finn on with a bite to his bottom lip and Finn was eager to comply. His hands traveled lower down the pilot’s body, grabbing his hips and pulling them down into his own. Finn couldn’t help but gasp as he felt that his pilot was just as hard as he was in the moment, this being the first time he’d ever been this intimately close to really gauge the other man's desire. Finn was both nervous and excited at this discovery.

As Finn bucked his hips up into Poe, the pilot let out a deep moan that only made Finn harder and more eager; he wanted to hear Poe moan like that again.

Poe started grinding against him, and it was now Finn moaning from the back of his throat, the sensation intense and nearly unbearable all at once. Then Poe’s mouth was on Finn’s necking, biting softly at the tender skin there. One of Finn’s hand flew to the back of the pilot’s head, fingers entwining in the thick curls as Poe’s mouth continued to move down to Finn’s chest.

As Poe continued to kiss and nip at every perfect spot on Finn’s upper body, the adrenaline coursing through Finn’s body was making him bolder. Finn’s hands were on Poe’s thighs, which were straddling Finn’s torso. Finn deliberately moved his hands up his thighs and paused at his hips before firmly using one hand to slip beneath his boxers and stroked the hard shaft underneath.

Poe’s hands gripped Finn in reaction, his face hidden in shadow, but Finn did hear an unmistakable sigh of pleasure at the touch. Since Poe wasn’t objecting, Finn used one hand to pull the boxers further down and wrapped the other hand around Poe’s cock, beginning to firmly pump his fist.

One of Poe’s hands was on Finn’s waist, fingertips now digging not unpleasantly into his skin. The other hand was on the back of Finn’s neck, squeezing it hard in time with Finn’s movements.

Finn was in love with the look on Poe’s face, his hair had fallen forward cast his face even further in shadow, his eyes were tightly shut in apparent pleasure and he was biting at his lip fervently. Finn knew he’d keep doing whatever he needed to do to keep pleasing Poe like this.

He slowly sat up, wanting to get in a better position, wanting to give everything to Poe. As he propped himself up on one arm, Poe put one hand on his chest and he backed himself out of Finn’s grasp. Finn quickly pulled his hand away, afraid he had done something wrong.

“You really wanna do this,” Poe asked. Finn looked at Poe, elated to see that long gone was the fear and doubt that constantly held the pilot back, his his face now expressed excitement and desire, his eyes had the same intense look of adventure and recklessness that they had the day Finn had rescued him off the Finalizer.

“Yes, yes I do,” Finn nodded eagerly. His answer was rewarded with a quick passionate kiss before Poe lightly rolled off him so he could fully get his boxers off. Finn followed suit, ready for his pilot.

“So how do you want to do this?” Poe asked casually as he dug through his bedside tables drawer, looking for something. “Any preferences?”

“Um,” Finn was suddenly nervous. Feeling exposed he drew up his knees to his chest and bit his lip. He didn’t know how to do this. Yes, he knew the basics of how sex worked but he hadn't exactly taken the time to ask how it would work between the two of them.

“Finn are you alright?” Poe asked, clearly concerned with his silence. The pilot dropped a small bottle of something onto the bed as he crawled over to where Finn sat.

“I don’t know how this is supposed to work,” Finn admitted, muttering under his breath and avoiding Poe’s eye. “I don’t know what you want me to do.”

Poe took a hold of Finn’s face and kissed him once. “Do you trust me?”

“Of course!” Finn replied immediately.

“Okay. If something doesn’t feel right just tell me to stop and we’ll work around it,” Poe smiled his most devilish smile as he backed off the bed, pulling Finn’s legs with him, making him straighten them out until they were pulled off the bed up to his thighs, his feet now on the floor.

Finn blushed and looked away as he was now fully exposed to Poe for the first time and was suddenly bashful. He wasn’t sure of what the pilot’s reaction would be to seeing him like this for the first time, but those thoughts of doubt were suddenly gone as Finn felt one hand around the base of his cock, then the pilot’s mouth fell around the rest of it.

“ _Oh fuck_ -” Finn gasped, unable to help himself. He glanced down and saw the pilot’s head carefully moving down his length. Finn leaned back, needing to look away. The sight of his pilots mouth on him was too much, and add the new and incredibly wonderful sensation of the act and Finn wouldn’t last long.

As Poe began moving his head in a faster rhythm, Finn couldn’t help the moans and whines that escaped his mouth. Every miniscule movement of the pilot sent waves of fresh pleasure and ecstasy through his body. Without thinking about it, Finn ran his hand through Poe’s hair, gripping it tightly as the pilot eagerly kept swallowing down Finn’s full and generous length down to the back of his throat. Finn couldn’t stop his body as he bucked his hips up, causing Poe to choke momentarily

“Poe I’m sorr—” Finn tried to apologize but the pilot went back down on him with renewed vigor, Finn’s enjoyment somehow spurring him on.

Too soon Poe’s handling of him was becoming too much for Finn to continue to handle, “Poe-“ He sputtered in between breaths, “-I’m--not--going to --last much--longer!”

Poe went fully down on him on last time, before slowly lifting his head off of him. He glance up at Finn with lustful eyes, his grinning lips slick with spit and making Finn mad with need for him.

Then Poe rose from his knees, hooking Finn’s knees over his shoulders as he stood. The pilot then leaned over, grabbing the small bottle he had dropped earlier. While he opened it and poured a generous amount of clear liquid onto the plan of his hand he said to Finn, “This might be uncomfortable at first, but I promise to be careful with you.”

Poe was true to his word. Finn laid back and did his best to relax his body as Poe gently worked his way inside of him with slick fingers. Now Finn understood the purpose of the small bottle Poe had searched for and was secretly grateful for it. And with Poe’s expert touch, it wasn’t long before the unfamiliar tight pressure became a comfortable pleasure.

When Finn’s legs fully relaxed and hung loosely over Poe’s shoulders, that must’ve been the sign Poe was looking for to take the next step. Removing his fingers, Poe used his other hand to tightly grasp Finn’s thigh, squeezing it in reassurance.

Poe entered him slowly, a dull burn that felt more good than painful. Finn breathed deeply, relaxing himself so he could continue to enjoy the new sensation in his body. When Finn felt Poe’s hips firmly pressed against the back of his thighs he moaned softly, the full length of Poe inside him was an impossibly pleasing feeling that he hadn’t expected.

“Finn, _honey_ \--oh you feel so _good_ ,” Poe panted, he slowly began pulling most of the way out before sliding back into Finn. He was cautiously increasing the momentum of his hips, watching Finn for any sign of discomfort.

While Finn appreciated the care Poe was putting into this, his physical need for more was beginning to peak. Finn crossed his ankles behind the pilot’s head, forcing him to lean closer.

Poe’s eyes were wide and questioning at Finn’s unexpected action. Now Finn was the one giving Poe the suggestive grin. “I’m ready for you to show me what you’ve got, _pilot_.”

He did his best to smirk and wink at Poe just Like Poe had so often done to him. And the effect was immediate. Poe barred his teeth in an animalistic grin, taking just one of Finn’s legs and lowering it. He gripped the one still over his shoulder tightly, using it as leverage as he began picking up speed and really fucking Finn with enthusiasm.

Scrabbling to find a sturdy grip in the sheets under him, Finn was yelling out in incredible pleasure. He got exactly what he had wanted from the pilot and his body was bucking in time to Poe’s thrusts, the movement encouraging the pilot to move faster and fuck him deeper.

  
“Godsdammit Finn,” the pilot panted, his voice husky and head thrown back in ecstasy. “Babe you’re fucking perfect!” Poe emphasized his point by grabbing Finn’s hips and ramming him hard.

Finn groaned at the sudden hurt-so-good feeling coursing through his body. He whimpered through his teeth, the pounding Poe was giving him was hitting all the right spots and Finn was too far gone and very close to going over the edge.

Poe must’ve sensed this. He took Finn's cock in his hand and began pumping it hard. Finn was practically writhing under the pilot’s expert touch, the most pleasure Finn had ever felt now coming from two areas.

But it was after Finn heard Poe mutter, ”Oh Finn--you fucking feel-- _fuck!_ ” that Finn reached his limits. He breathed out hard and moaned in satisfaction as he came. The satisfaction of the act tensed his muscles and immediately Poe sped up his rhythm, needing the release as well.It wasn’t long before the pilot tensed up while still inside him, biting at his bottom lip as he sighed out a long groan of pleasure, his hand and fingers tightly gripping Finn’s ass as he finished. The pilot stood over him for a minute longer, smiling to himself as he left one hand wander over the relaxed muscles of Finn’s stomach.

When the pilot did pull out of him, Finn couldn’t help but wince. The whole sex thing had been amazing, but he knew that he’d be sore from the experience for a good long while. As Poe wiped himself down, Finn pulled himself back onto the bed, now thoroughly exhausted after experiencing this new intense pleasure that had traveled through him and that the adrenaline had finished running its course through his veins.

Poe ungracefully laid down beside Finn, letting out a low chuckle. “Now that’s kinda how I saw our first night together going,”

Finn laughed with the pilot. “That was… Wow. Just wow.”

Poe reached over and pulled Finn into his side, enveloping him in his broad arms. “Did I do okay? Did I hurt you at all?” Poe whispered, just a hint or worry was detectable in his words.

“Not at all, Poe,” Finn smiled into the pilot’s neck, where his head now rested. “I actually quite enjoyed myself. Maybe next time we’ll cut back on the self loathing of our dark pasts and get right to business.”

Poe laughed loudly at that, a genuine, bright sound in the dark room. Poe turned and kissed the top of his head.

“I love you Finn,” he said earnestly. Causing Finn’s heart to leap and nearly burst with happiness at the words.

“Love you too, Poe.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone enjoyed the long chapter-didn’t know where to break this one up sooooo I didn’t :3


	8. Chapter 8

“Make sure you fill out the report properly next time, Red,” Finn said, a tired smile on his face. He had to have explained this a dozen times to him already, but he couldn’t help but go easy on their newsy recruit. “The General will kill us both the next time you leave out the important details, you know, like your name.”

Finn handed the holopad back to Red, a tall man with freckles skin and dark red hair, hence the name Red. Red accepted the pad and nodded sheepishly at Finn. The man was lucky he was better with a blaster than he was at filling out the debriefing reports.

“And can you make sure that Fhlier gets her gear repaired properly this time? If I hear about her short range scanner going out again…”

  
Finn sent the man away with a smirk, hoping it was the last of his troopers that he needed to talk to. He was ready to sneak off to his room, even if it meant skipping dinner. It had been a long week away from the base and Finn was looking forward to a full night's sleep for once. Especially in a bed and not on the cold ground outdoors.

He sat back down in front of a computer, quickly typing a message to the General, letting her know where he’d be for the rest of the night if she needed him for anything. She hadn’t been able to debrief him personally and he hoped that she would wait until the morning to do so. He ran a hand over his face, the stubble itchy against his palms. _I’ve been slipping,_ he thought tiredly. _It’s been ages since I forgot to shave after waking up…_

Finn stood up and straightened out his leather jacket before heading down the busy hallways that lead toward his quarters. He nodded politely and greeted the Resistance members he passed, still grateful to have smiling faces walk by him instead of the blank masks of stormtroopers and the brooding superiority of the First Order Officers.

After reaching his tiny room, his smile dropped when he saw what he already knew to be true: Poe still hadn’t returned from his mission.

The Resistance had moved to this base nearly a year ago. Their old abandoned First Order hideout had become compromised so they had relocated to this disused clone war era military bunker. It was small and barely housed them all, but it was better than being found by the Order. Poe and Finn, wanting to bunk together, had shoved two tiny cots next to each other, making the already small space even more cramped. But Finn didn’t mind it . Well, he didn’t mind it when Poe remembered to put his things away in their proper place so they could actually walk around in it.

Finn took off his worn boots and neatly stowed them under the foot of his cot, removed his prized jacket that his pilot had given him and hung it on the back of the door and made his way to the refresher. He had just returned back from a long recon mission to infiltrate a First Order outpost, and his team had successfully taken them out. Finn was proud of his pathfinders that he lead. They called themselves the Renegade Troopers, because most of them were actually First Order defectors like Finn himself.

Finn’s message that the New Republic sent out to try and turn the Stormtroopers against the Order had been a huge success, with many wanting to help fight to bring the Order down once they had escaped. After successfully training his hand picked team, Finn had been promoted to Captain within the Resistances ranks, a title and honor that he held proudly. Finn and his Renegades had carried out many dangerous missions and raids, and to date, all of them had been successful.

Once in the ‘fresher, Finn took off his sweat stained shirt and looked himself over in the mirror, it hadn’t even been a full year and a half since he had made the choice to run from the First Order, but he looked like he had matured ages. His hair had grown out from his standard First Order cut, and while he kept it cropped short on the sides still, he kept the tight curls slightly longer on top, knowing that his pilot loved the look. The scar on the front of his shoulder that Ren had made with his lightsaber would always be a dark pink mar on his dark skin, and it had been joined by a thick straight line scarred down his bicep, the result of a knife that was held by a very upset Pantoran that was determined to keep the Resistance as well as the First Order off of her homestead. Across his collarbone was a new injury, a jagged cut now scabbed over from where a stormtrooper had hit him in the chest with the butt of his blaster. Finn shrugged at himself, it could’ve always been worse.

Finn methodically shaved off the stubble that had begun to show on his cheeks. He stopping following most of the First Orders regulations, but keeping himself clean shaven had stuck with him for whatever reason. Once satisfied with the smooth skin beneath his fingertips, he showered quickly before heading to bed.

Finn sat there awake for a long time, his hand resting in the empty space that Poe usually occupied. They were both dedicated to fighting in and ending this war, but it didn’t make their sacrifices any less difficult. General Organa had always been sympathetic, doing her best to send them on missions to the same planets when she could, or trying to send them off at the same time so neither of them was at the base without the other for very long. Recently luck had not been on their side and it had been nearly two months since they’d seen each other. The last transmission Finn received from Poe had been seventeen days ago. He really did try to not worry, to tell himself that while in deep space sending out any form of communication that wasn’t life or death was too risky for Poe and the rest of his squadron. Tonight though was one of those night that Finn couldn’t help but feel the twinge of hopelessness eating away at his heart and mind.

He sighed softly, he trusted that pilot’s skill and wit would get him home safely. He didn’t really have any other choice but to rely on that trust. After another moment staring at the empty cot next to him, Finn turned on his back, hoping the pilot would keep his word and return home soon.

*******

It was late, very late, when a soft series of beeps woke Finn.

“It’s alright BeeBee, just get recharged,” a low voiced whispered.

Finn opened his eyes. In the dark room he could see the soft blue lights of BB-8 rolling away from him towards the back wall of the room. He turned his head towards the door and saw a broad figure removing his jacket.

Poe.

He smiled to himself and reached out to grab the pilot’s leg as he walked past the bed.

“Hey buddy,” Poe said in a hushed tone, bending down to kiss Finn. “Sorry I woke ya,”

“S’okay,” Finn murmured, voice thick with sleep. “Glad you’re back, Poe.”

“Glad to be back,” he smiled softly. “Give me a sec and I’ll be back.”

Finn let go of his leg as Poe stood up, walking over to the refresher to change out of his pilot’s jumpsuit. It wasn’t long before the pilot was crawling over Finn to get to his side of the shared bed. Finn immediately wrapped his arms around him, unable to find words to express just how much he had missed him.

Poe then too embraced Finn, bringing their bodies together and then kissing him sweetly. Finn would never tire of the feeling of the pilot’s lips pressed against his. Finn ran one of his hands down Poe’s arm, the skin on skin contact bringing him the first real calm he’d felt in weeks.

“I was worried about you,” Finn stated simply, unable to help himself as he stated into the pilot's warm eyes, finding comfort in their seemingly endless depths. By the stars, Finn thought, I’m becoming as hopeless of a romantic as he is.

“Didn’t I tell you not to do that,” Poe answered back playfully, but his eyes narrowed in concern that he had worried Finn. He hated making Finn feel anxious over him.

“It’s hard not to when your boyfriend is a reckless, hotheaded pilot,” Finn cradled the pilot’s face in his hand, his thumb brushing over his cheekbone.

“I’ve toned down the recklessness,” Poe argued in a hushed tone, closing his eyes and leaning into Finn touch.

“Yeah, right,” Finn rolled his eyes and pulled him even closer, making the pilot’s body flush with his.

Poe eyes opened in slight surprise, with eyebrows raised flirtatiously, “Feels like you’re the one wanting to be hotheaded and reckless right now,”

Finn felt his face heating up, he hadn’t realized that his body had reacted to the pilot like that… but in his defense it had been a long while since he had seen him.

Poe kissed him again a chuckled. “Listen Big Deal, I’ll take care of ya in the morning. I promise. It’s the least I can do after being gone for so long.”

“I’ll hold you to that, pilot,” Finn grinned and he startled himself into the pilot's side.

“You better,” Poe mumbled, sleep quickly taking the pilot as he settled himself and closed his eyes.

Finn looked at him a moment longer, his lips slightly parted, his chest moving up and down in a slow beat. Just like that the pilot was out cold. Finn smiled as he laid his head on Poe’s shoulder, grateful that they both survived long enough to spend at least this night together.

***********

Finn tried to shake the sweat out of his eyes, needing to be able to see the sight in front of him. He was tightly holding onto the pilot’s hips, the dark skinned his hands in beautiful contrast to the pilot’s light tan. Poe was on his hands and knees in front of him, his head bowed down and panting, as the pilot had just came again for the second time that morning. As Finn continued to pound into his pilot, he removed one hand from the hip to the small of his back, running down the pilot’s spine as far as he could reach. He was a sight to behold.

Poe arched his back at the new touch, changing the angle at which Finn entered him, sending new waves of sensation into his body. No matter what position he was in, Poe always seemed to know exactly the right way to move and twist to please Finn even more.

Once the pilot was arched back as far as he could go he turned his head and winked at Finn, an infuriatingly simple thing that drove Finn mad with desire. He dug his hand into the pilot’s hair, yanking it back just enough for him to know that Finn was still somewhat in control. With his other hand he squeezed Poe’s ass hard enough to leave bruises in the firm muscle.

Poe yelled out a loud, “ _Yes_!” He voice coming out slightly choked from his head being bent back. Finn relished the sound, loving his pilot’s screams of pleasure. It had been a surprise when Finn learned first hand the Poe was a screamer in bed, and Finn always wanted to see just how loud he could get the pilot to go.

“ _Harder_ Finn,” he yelled out in between his sharp breaths. “Fuck me harder!”

Finn used to hesitate to fulfill these requests, fearing that he would hurt his pilot. But after a little practice and learning exactly what the pilot liked, Finn only hesitated now for one reason; to tease him.

Pulling the pilot’s hair just a tad harder, forcing the pilot’s head back even more, Finn deliberately slowed then stopped his thrusts. “I’m sorry what did you ask?”

Finn could make out the pilot’s greedy smile. “You heard me,” He replied, voice heavy with lust and impatience.

Finn pushed himself deeper into Poe, forcing a deep moan out of the pilot.

“Hmm? What was that,” Finn asked, enjoying the game but also wanting the release. He tightened his grip on the pilot’s hip, adding more bruises to the perfectly bare skin.

“Fuck me Finn,” Poe finally answered backing his body into Finn’s. “Fuck me hard.”

More than ready to fulfill the request Finn let go of Poe’s hair and held on to his hips again, determined to really give him the fuck he wanted. The pulled the pilot onto him and he thrust forward, using the moment of their two bodies to push his cock far inside the pilot. He picked up speed every time the pilot cried out, wanting to make sure he didn't go silent before he was done.

Finn was rewarded with a guttural yell, the pilot’s words incomprehensible. The pilot leaned forward on his elbows, bringing his backside up higher. Once again the change in position sent new sparks into him, this time finally sending him over the edge. He pushed himself deep inside Poe as he came, allowing a loud groan to hiss past his lips, breathing hard as the ecstasy coursed through him.

Slowly backing away from Poe’s prone figure still on his knees, Finn lowered himself onto the bed next to him. Poe stretched out cat-like beside him, letting out a low whistle. “Looks like you worked yourself out,” he commented, dragging his finger along Finn’s chest.

“It was only fair,” Finn replied, still trying to catch his breath. “I couldn’t let you do all the work.”

Poe smiled at the memory of their morning. The two had been on top of each other since waking up, a proper greeting for them since they had been apart for so long. They started slow, taking their time to adjust their bodies to each other again. Then the two went wild, the need to feel the other too strong to savor the moment. Despite their hunger for one another and the fact that they had both returned from long, demanding missions, they were able to keep up their stamina throughout the entire morning.

They didn’t realize, nor did they really care, how long the two of them stayed there, lying naked under the sheets, one telling the other about the missions that they had most recently carried out. Poe had gone into deep space, searching for the source of a transmission that had been sent to the Resistance. The transmission had included classified Resistance secrets, so the General needed to know who had sent it, so she could find out how they got access to that information. As Poe began to describe the jungle planet the signal had led them to, BB-8, who had been in standby mode in the corner, beeped to life and rolled over to the couple, beeping out something to poe.

Finn waited patiently for the droid to finish. He had never been able to pick up the droid binary speech, making him rely on Poe for translation.

Once BB-8 finished Poe turned to Finn, “Looks like the Generals finally calling us in to debrief. I’ll shower first?”

Finn nodded, watching the pilot’s stretch his back as he stood up, the muscles in his back flexing and rolling, and noticing the deep purple bruises that had blossomed on his backside and hips. _Yeah_ , Finn thought as the pilot walked into the fresher, _still one of my favorite views._

Finn begrudgingly got out of bed and started pulling off the blankets and sheets with him. Not even one full day back and they had made a terrible mess of the bed already. While he replaced the dirty sheets with fresh ones, he heard his pilot singing to himself in the shower. This was nothing new, as the pilot always tending to fill his quiet moments alone with some sort of noise. It was just that the pilot rarely sung in front of others, so whenever Finn got the chance to listen to him, he always dropped what he was doing.

Finn added the pilot’s dirty clothes (left in the middle of room, again...) to the sheets as the pilot’s voice carried in their small room. He was singing a sort of sad love song that Finn had heard before. When he asked about it, it had been something that his mother used to sing to her husband before she died.

Too soon Poe fell silent as he got out of the shower. Finn playfully pulled down the towel that was wrapped around his waist as he passed to jump in the shower next. Finn was quick about getting ready, not wanting to keep the General waiting.

The two were soon on their way, walking with their hands clasped together down the narrow crowded hallways of their base with BB-8 happily rolling ahead of them. Poe was stopped regularly, everyone seemed to want to really make sure the pilot was back here, as he’d been absent from the base for so long. Finn, as he usually did, had to pull Poe away from conversations so they could get to where they were asked to be. _The two of us really are a good balance of opposites_ , Finn though at Poe blushed at him while being pulled away from another chat, with BB-8 impatiently waiting for them.

They found the General in her private quarters, a sparsely decorated room filled with screens that constantly spouting different feeds of news, information and statistics. Even in her room she was hard at work for the Resistance.

“Good to see you both back,” she nodded towards them as she crossed the room to stand beside them. “Excellent work _Commander_ Finn, taking down that base should’ve taken you twice as long. But once again, here you are exceeding everyone’s expectations.” She smiled warmly at him.

“Thank you, General,” he tried to keep some level of professionalism around her, but couldn’t help smiling just a little at the compliment.

“Now Dameron, you and your squadron need to learn how to report back to base properly,” she scolded the pilot. “You were within the base’s anti-aircraft cannons when you decided to let us know you were returning. Let’s try a little warning so you don’t get shot out of the sky next time.”

Finn watched as Poe’s brows furrowed in thought, his grin disappearing into a small frown. _He got yelled at all the time,_ Finn thought _, why is he looking so upset about it now?_

“We’re both Commanders, you know,” Poe stated, an unusual arrogance in his tone. “You could refer to me as such, General.”

Finn tensed and for a moment he thought Leia would for sure throttle the man--but then he immediately relaxed when the General laughed and embraced Poe. Finn sighed in relief and shook his head at himself. He would never get used to the casual way Poe and Leia would insult each other when not around others. Their family-like bond was most apparent in private times together like this.

“It is good to have you back, Commander Dameron,” Leia held him out at arm's length. “When we didn’t hear from you after you reported that you’d seen the Absolution--“

“Had to play it safe,” Poe shrugged casually. “Couldn’t risked them intercepting our comms. So I kept silent. Well silent for you, my squad threatened to shoot me out of the space themselves if I didn’t shut up!”

“Can’t blame them, really,” Finn muttered under his breath with a smile, causing both Poe and the General to laugh.

Leia smiled warmly at both of them, and Finn noticed a roguish glint on her eye, a look only saw when she had something risky and bold, but not necessarily bad to tell them. Finn didn’t think she’d called them here just to have them go over their missions.

“So I have some news that I want to share with the both of you,” she started. Nope, not a debriefing. “Can’t say that it’s good or bad, only that it’s unexpected and--” She paused, her eyes brows raised in almost awe or disbelief. “I think that could very well be the end of the First Order, if we play this right.”

Finn was stunned, Leia Organa wasn’t the type for dramatics, and would never make such a bold statement unless she really did believe it could actually happen. He looked to Poe, and saw the same shocked look on his face. Then the pilot’s lips turned up in a rogue grin, his eyes bright with renewed hope and determination.

“Tell us what you’ve got, General,” Poe said fiercely. “We’re ready to take those bastards down!”

Finn could tell Leia was surpressing an urge to grin just like how Poe was.

“I received an encrypted transmission from my brother, Luke, and from Rey,”

Finn gasped. They hadn’t heard from them since she left the Resistance Base after destroying Starkiller. Finn did constantly worry about her, but as Leia had constantly told him, no news was good news.

“Apparently the two have been traveling around in wild space, searching through unknown territories looking for _something_. They didn’t say what it was in case the message was intercepted, but they hinted that they’ll be traveling back to the known parts of the galaxy soon, and that they’ll need our help. Luke also mentioned that whatever it is that they’re doing could help us defeat the First Order. I know we don’t have much to go on from that, but I want you and your squads prepared to leave at a moment’s notice. As soon as Luke sends word of where he is, we’ll be going there. Of course I need you to be discreet, I met you here in the privacy of my room for a reason. You’re the only two that possess the best star fighters and ground troopers in the base. I don’t see the reason for informing anyone else but you two. While I do not believe there is a mole or traitor among us, it’s always possible for the wrong person the let this vital information slip to unfriendly ears.”

Leia looked at them more seriously now. “I don’t know what Luke thinks he has found, but after everything he’s been through he would not have sent this warning to prepare us if he didn’t truly believe that this could be the deciding point in this war. I don’t think I need to stress just how important this is to either of you.”

“No ma’am!”

“We got it!”

She nodded at them, her smile reappearing. “Now, just to make sure no one gets too suspicious about that might be happening, you two can take the rest of the day for yourselves, and then start getting your teams ready tomorrow. Tell them whatever you need to to make sure the information about Luke and Rey stays between us for now.”

She waved her hand dismissively at them. “Now go and enjoy the day together before I figure out some other errand for the both of you.”

“Can you believe it?” Finn immediately whispered to Poe once leaving the General's quarters and checking that the hallways was clear. “We finally heard from Rey! And Luke Skywalker!”

“And it looks like they might have an idea how to take down the First Order,” Poe whispered back, the excitement was clear in his voice. “What in the galaxy could they be looking for though?”

Finn shrugged, “No idea. Besides the lightsabers and the Force I don’t really know much about Jedi weapons.”

The two men spent their late lunch discussing their wild theories in hushed tones about what sort of ancient Jedi artifact the two Force users could be looking for. After Poe suggested it was some sort of giant lightsaber missile that could be launched from his X-Wing, Finn laughed until his sides ached. They didn’t know much about the Jedi, but they could at least keep themselves entertained.

The spend the last of the daylight hours outside their base, which was surrounded by a sparse forest of tall skinny trees covered in dark blue-green leaves. They sat under the orange tinged sky and Poe finished telling Finn about his long adventure in space, chasing after a mystery signal that lead them to one of the First Orders Star Destroyers. It had been the first time that a Resistance member had spotted the Absolution, the training station for the young Stormtroopers they kidnapped, and came back to tell anyone. They had to flee immediately to avoid being caught in their tractor beam but his squad had all made it out.

Finn loved listening to Poe talk about flying. He was so passionate and descriptive it almost felt like Finn was there with him. While he told him about maneuvering through an asteroid belt, Finn could practically see the large space rocks hurtling around him as Poe details his X-Wings dips, dives and barrel rolls around the debris. Not for the first time, Finn wished he was a better pilot so he could witness these stories first hand as one of Poe’s squad. But Finn had his own team to fight beside, and that was nearly as good as fighting alongside his pilot.

Once the sun started dipping below the horizon, Finn and Poe walked back to the base, arms around each other to help block out the immediate chill that rose as the light disappeared. Wanting to keep to themselves for the night, they headed back to their small room and huddled up together on the bed. In the now dimmed room, the main light coming from his holopad, Finn was reading again, now wanting to learn about the old Jedi Order. Poe leaned on him, and lazily read over his shoulder. There was a comfortable silence shared between the two of them, and in the middle of the war the quiet moments were sometimes the best ones. Today was no exception, after all the chaos and fighting that he’d just been through, the calm day he spent with his Poe was one of the best he’d ever had.

“What do you want to do, once this is over?” Poe asked, breaking the silence.

“Once the book is over?” Finn replied, uncertain of what exactly Poe was asking him.

“No, once the war is over.”

Finn shrugged his one free shoulder, “I haven’t really thought about it really. I’m planning on going wherever you go.”

“You don’t have any other things that you wanted to do? Besides finishing the Order?”

Finn furrowed his brow. Poe was being oddly insightful tonight. The man usually didn’t plan past his next meal, maybe as far in the future as his next fight. But they’d never talked about after the war. For Finn at least, his whole life had centered around defeating one enemy or another.

“I’ve never told you the whole story Poe,” Finn started, “but back when I woke up from my fight with Ren, I wanted to run from the First Order _and_ the Resistance, but I had no idea what I would’ve done to get by. Although, in all my daydreams of living outside of the war and the fighting, I always imagined you there with me. Even before I realized that I wanted you in a more intimate way, I always wanted to have you with me during whatever I ended up doing. I always pictured you being the one getting us into trouble, and I had to drag us out of it.”

Finn laughed, it had been ages since he thought about his old dreams of running away, Poe tagging along with him. Those were uncertain times for him, but he never regretted staying with the Resistance.

“Why didn’t you ask me to leave with you?” Poe questioned, an uncharacteristic tone of seriousness in his voice.

Finn turned his head to look at Poe’s face, the pilot’s head was still resting on his shoulder. His eyebrows were drawing together, but it wasn’t quite concern that was in his eyes. He almost looked nervous or anxious. But that couldn’t be right, the pilot was never nervous, nothing ever rattled him.

“Because you belonged here. Well, here with the Resistance. I knew you believed in what you were fighting for and I never wanted to put you in a compromising position where you’d have to choose because I also knew you’d want to help me and not have me leave by myself. You were my only real friend and I couldn’t make you choose whether to leave or to stay and help the cause you’ve fought for and wanted to see through. That would’ve been worse than just leaving and never seeing you again.”

Poe lifted his head slightly, fixing Finn with an unreadable look before leaning in to kiss him. Finn was slightly confused, normally he could tell everything the pilot was thinking by his expressions, but tonight he was unreadable.

Poe suddenly was up and straddling Finn, not that Finn was complaining about the new position.

“So, you haven’t really thought about after the war?” Poe asked again.

“I just planned on following you to wherever you went,” Finn said honestly. “That’s the only part that matters.”

“Even if I found some other battle to fight? Some other cause that needed soldiers?” Poe pressed, oddly serious again.

“Yeah, I don’t see why I wouldnt,” he answered slowly. “Unless you were thinking of defecting to the First Order, then we might have some problems.”

“I kriffin’ love you, Finn,” Poe said, smiling wide at the joke then leaning in to kiss him intensely, making Finn’s head spin at the suddenness of it. He revived quickly from the surprise and wrapped his arms around the pilot, slowly pulling up the back of his shirt to feel the smooth warm skin beneath.

Then Poe was pulling away from Finn and sliding off the bed altogether.

“Wait, no!” Finn whined, grabbing at the pilot as he slid away. _What is going on with him?_ Finn thought as he turned onto his side to watch whatever the pilot was doing. “I liked where that was going…”

Poe was now sitting cross legged on the floor, searching for something under their bed, pulling out the spare boots and gear they stored under there. Finn cocked his head at the pilot, leaning on one elbow.

“Poe? What has gotten into you?” Finn reached out and tapped him on his head. “Spent a little too long in space this time?”

Poe then pulled out an old pair of flight gloves, and turned it upside down, a small box dropped from it and into Poe’s open palm. In the dimmed pale blue light of the room, Finn could see Poe’s smile widen, and his cheeks were suddenly flushed.

“I was going to wait to ask you,” Poe said, his voice shaking with nervous excitement. The pilot sat up on his knees, his wide eyes bright and shining as they stared intensely at Finn. “But I just can’t any more--“

The pilot laughed nervously. “Finn, I love you. And it’s you I want, it’s always been you. I’d risk everything just to make sure we always have each other,”

Finn’s heart started beating faster at Poe’s words, his last breath seemed stuck in his throat.

“I’d never make you do anything you don’t think you should, I value your freedom and your choices. And if you want, you can stay with me just for tonight. Or just through tomorrow. But, if I promise you everything I am Finn, would you stay for the rest of your life?”

Poe presented the small box to Finn, opening it slowly. Inside on a black cushion sat a brushed silver metal ring, with an inlay of black metal running through the center of it. Finn’s breathing hitched, his eyes wide and suddenly stinging with tears as he realized exactly what the pilot was asking him.

“Finn,” the pilot smiled his most winning smile, the one that never failed to make Finn’s heart skip a beat. “Marry me?”

Finn only hesitated for a second, and only because he couldn’t quite find his voice. “Yes!” he could feel his grin taking up his whole face. “Yes! Of course I will!” He flung himself onto Poe, half of his body off the bed now, and hugged him tight. Poe hugged him back, turning his head to kiss his cheek. Finn only broke off the hug to pull his pilot back onto the bed with him. They sat looking at each other and grinning like fools for a moment, both in disbelief of what just transpired.

“Wow,” Poe said, breaking the silence with a small laugh. “Did you really say yes to me?”

Finn chuckled too. “I did actually. Lucky you!”

Poe laughed again as he reopened the small box he still clutched, plucking out the ring inside and hand in it to Finn. “Try it on! I had to guess the size, but it should be a pretty close fit.”

Finn carefully took the ring from him and took a closer look at it. “What’s the black metal in the middle?”

“It’s actually a piece off of Black One. Thought it would be like having a piece of me with you when I’m away flying her,” Poe said, his blush deepening.

Finn felt his heart swell at the gesture. His X-Wing has always been his most prized possession, and now Finn had a small part of it too. As he turned the ring he saw a tiny inscription on the inside. As he held the ring closer to his eyes to read it, Poe said, “It says ‘Finn Dameron’. I thought if you said yes, since I already kinda gave you your first name, maybe you’d like my last name as well…”

 _This pilot better stop,_ Finn thought as he felt himself begin to choke up _. I can’t handle all these emotions and no one wants to see a grown man cry._

Finn slipped the band over the ring finger on his left hand. The contrast of the brushed metal on his dark skin was beautiful, and Finn wondered if the pilot picked it out specifically because it would look good on him.

“ _Finn Dameron_ ,” he whispered to himself, still looking at the band on his finger in awe and a little disbelief. “You really want me to be your husband?”

Finn looked up at Poe who was beaming. A few months into their relationship Finn had fallen into a dark place in his mind when Phasma had publicly executed twenty Stormtroopers that’s had attempted to defect from the First Order over a live broadcast. She had blamed FN-2187 personally for their deaths and claimed their blood was on his hands for trying to turn others into traitors like he was. That had hit him hard and he was convinced that he didn’t deserve to be with Poe.

Poe was a war hero and the most skilled pilot in the Resistance, if not the galaxy! A natural born leader with charisma that could charm the hair off a Wookiee, Poe was a legend in his own right and should be with someone on his same level, not an ex-stormtrooper who didn’t know his place in the galaxy. Finn had also become painfully aware of his youth, being nearly ten years younger than Poe. He felt that Poe should have someone with actual real life experiences instead of himself who was almost still a kid and really knew nothing outside of his First Order upbringing.

But Poe would hear none of that then. And he still wouldn’t hear any of his doubts now.

“If you marry me Finn,” Poe began earnestly, “nothing in this whole galaxy, even if I took down the entire First Order single handedly, nothing would make me happy than knowing that I’d have you for the rest of my life.”

Poe took Finn’s hand, his thumb running over the metal band that now sat there.

“I’ll marry you, Poe Dameron,” Finn confirmed, squeezing Poe’s hand.

Poe laughed and pulled Finn so that he was practically on top of the pilot now. “I cannot wait for that day, my future Finn Dameron!”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to do it-I couldn’t help myself and needed to add in a proposal <3


	9. Chapter 9

For the second night in a row, Finn found himself awake in the middle of the night. Or was it very early in the morning now? Turning his head he saw the Poe was no longer in bed with him. _Odd_ … He then noticed a light brightening the room from behind him, and he heard soft voices whispering excitedly.

  
Wait, voices?

  
Finn stiffen, immediately on alert, straining to hear who was talking and what they were saying.

  
“-still disappointed I haven’t even met him,” a mystery voice spoke.

  
“I know I know, I promise I’ll get him to Yavin IV as soon as I can,” That was Poe, was he talking to his-?

  
“So tell me son,” Yup, Poe was talking to his father, Kes Dameron. He must have him on the holocam. “Why in the galaxy did you need to call me this early just to tell me about your boyfriend that I already know about?”

  
“Well, he’s not just my boyfriend,” Finn smiled as he hear Poe take a deep breath. “I proposed to him last night and he said yes!”

  
“You’re engaged?!” The older man asked, his excitement mirroring Poe’s. “Congratulations!”

  
“Shhh! Finn’s still asleep!” Poe warned, even though his voice was still pretty loud in the small room.

  
“Sorry-sorry!” Kes laughed. “I know you were thinking about it, but I thought you were going to wait?”

  
Poe sighed, “I know, but yesterday was just perfect. It had been the first day we’ve spent together in months and it just hit me. I needed to ask him, I needed to know!”

  
Finn now raised his head from the bed, to get a better look at the holocam where Poe’s father's face was projected. He was a handsome, older man, with tanned skin and dark hair. The family resemblance between the two was striking, they both had the same wide grin and roguish eyes.

  
Kes was now beaming at Poe. “Son, I am so proud of you. And I know your mother would be too. I’ve seen you go through so much, and you’ve sacrificed the majority of your life fighting for others. You need Finn, and it makes me so happy to see that you realized this and have done everything to make this work.”

  
Finn heard Poe sniff. He knew that Poe had always been very close with his parents, and had always wanted to do something that they could really be proud of. They had helped bring down the empire and bring balance to the whole galaxy, and Poe wanted to them know that he was trying to do his part to make sure the galaxy was kept balanced. But apparently, to Kes, the relationship he had with Finn was what they had really wanted for their son.

  
“When you both have some down time between blowing up planets and getting tortured, I want you to bring Finn here. I’d really like to meet my future son-in-law before the ceremony. And don’t you even think about eloping Poe-“

  
Poe laughed at that. “I wouldn’t dream of it dad! Besides, I gotta show Finn where I grew up. We haven’t had a chance to talk about it but, I’m hoping he’ll be okay with getting married there.”

  
The two men talked about some of the places on Yavin IV while Finn settled back down into bed. He was now awake and excited at the prospect of seeing Poe’s home world and meeting his family.

  
In a few moments, Poe had bid his father goodbye and shut off the holo feed. Finn nearly laughed out loud as he heard the pilot’s failing attempts at making it back to the bed quietly. When he got to the bed he saw that Finn was awake waiting for him and smiled ruefully.

  
“Guess I was a little too excited to wait to tell my dad until the morning,” he said apologetically. “Sorry If I was too loud.”

  
Finn pulled him into the bed and kissed him. “Don’t apologize. I’m glad you told him. He seems to be alright with you choosing this ex-stormtrooper for a fiancé.”

  
Poe chuckled at Finn, “I’m more surprised that’s he’s alright letting you, a respectable and high ranking member of the Resistance marry his careless and wild son. In his eyes, no one should have to deal with me for that long.”

  
“You are a handful,” Finn agreed. “So I heard you telling your dad that you wanted to get married on Yavin IV?”

  
“We don’t have to if you didn’t want to,” Poe quickly said, not wanting to make any decisions for Finn that he wasn’t comfortable with.

  
“Honestly it doesn’t matter much to me,” Finn replied. “I don’t have a home world of my own, and it’ll be nice to be apart of your family.”

  
Poe kissed the tip of Finn’s nose, “You’ll love being part of the Dameron family, I promise. If my dad didn’t make me promise to not elope, I’d have the General make it official tonight.”

  
“Let’s not put your dad through that,” Finn chuckled. “I’d at least like the chance to make a good impression on him before stealing you away.”

  
“Yeah,” Poe agreed, “I also don’t want him to kill me either.”

  
While rolling his eyes and smiling at Poe, Finn reached for his datapad on the floor next to him to check the time.

  
“Well, the General will kill the both of us if we don’t get out of bed soon,” Finn said with a sigh. “I planned an early morning drill for my troopers, I figured that would give them a good taste of what to be prepared for when we have to leave.”

  
Poe dramatically draped his body over Finn’s with a loud groan. “Why did you do that? I’m not meeting with the pilot’s to go over the the new starfighter formations until after lunch!”

  
“Because the General asked us to be ready, not lazy,” Finn messed the hair on Poe's head playfully. “Now let me up so I can make sure we’re prepared to fight through this whole mess so I can marry you someday.”

  
Poe reluctantly, and slowly, rolled off of Finn, but with a grin on his face.

“Hopefully soon. I didn’t want to seem like I was rushing this because of the war or anything. I meant it when I said I was planning on waiting. I had a whole event planned, with X-Wings flying over head, maybe even fireworks, I was thinking that the whole base could be there and-“

  
Finn interrupted him quickly, “While I would’ve appreciated the gesture, I’m glad you asked me like you did, just the two of us,” Finn looked at the metal band on his finger that Poe had given him with a smile. “Because really, this is all I need.”

  
Over the next few weeks, Finn and Poe kept themselves busy with training and preparing their teams for any possible future ahead of them. Along with their duties, the two were constantly being stopped and congratulated on their engagement. In the middle of a war, happy news like this was celebrated by everyone and boosted the energy in the whole base. General Leia seemed to be the happiest of all, touching both of their cheeks with tears of joy in her eyes as they stood in front of her, asking if she’d be the one to marry them when the day eventually came.

  
Life around the base eventually settled into what could be considered normal for the couple. Occasionally they’d be send out on a scouting or reconnaissance mission in response to something First Order may have done or was rumored to be doing. But nothing excited happened until late one night when Finn had stayed behind in the large blaster sharp-shooting training room with a few of his troopers. They were having a friendly competition to see who had the best shot. Though now, the three troopers were all just trying to outshoot Finn.

  
“Another bullseye, great.” Mercer muttered, his blue eyes torn between awe and disappointment as Finn once again hit the moving target he had released dead center. “I don’t think any of us has a chance against the Commander.”

  
“Well you certainly don’t Mercer,” Tigg responded, a tall dark skinned man now aiming his own weapon. “But I know I still have a chance.”

  
A broad shouldered woman next to Tigg with a buzzed haircut and a wicked grin laughed at him. “Tinn your chances were up four rounds ago! You don’t even have a hope of catching up to the Commander!”

  
“Alright, Mercy,” Finn told the woman with a chuckle. “I mean, you’re not wrong, but at least give the guy his last shot.”

  
Mercer quickly released the target which shot rapidly across the ceiling of the training center. Tigg lined up his shot and pulled the trigger, the blaster bolt just barely clipping the target as it made contact.

  
The three troopers all groaned in unison as they realized that they had lost to Finn again. Not wanting to appear too proud of himself, Finn smiled broadly and shrugged his soldiers. “Better luck next time guys, but I wasn’t the best in my unit for no-“

  
Finn was cut off as his personal comm started blaring in his pocket. His eyebrows immediately furrowed in concern as he pulled up the urgent message from General Organa.

  
“What’s happened sir?”

  
“Is there an emergency?”

  
Finn held up his hand for silence as he read:

  
_Finn-I’ve received the message from Luke that we’ve been waiting for. Don’t direct your troopers just yet. Meet me in my quarters immediately_

_  
-General Organa_

  
He sighed under his breath; there was no immediate threat. But he knew that could change at my moment.

  
“It’s alright guys, no need to get wound up,” Finn hurriedly told the three gathered around him, all clearly holding their breath for news. “The General just needs to see me. Just-just make sure all the troopers get to the barracks early tonight, get a full night of rest, alright?”

  
He nodded at them for taking off towards Leia’s room. He tried not to think of what Skywalker might’ve possibly sent them, the hundred of possibilities were endless and only stressed Finn out more than what the truth most likely would be.

  
Within moments Finn had arrived at the Generals quarters. He knocked rapidly at the door and entered the room as soon as the door began sliding open.

  
Leia’s back was to him, a soft blue glow was illuminating her frame, it’s source hidden from Finn’s view. There was a soft, hesitant voice coming from the light source.

  
“...I do believe I’ve found the true location, Leia, and if I have I know Snoke won’t be far behind. I wish I could explain more to you but there just isn’t time. Follow the coordinates for the hangar and your fleet should be safe once concealed inside. I hope to see you again soon.”

  
Finn had approached Leia to see a hologram of who could be none other than Luke Skywalker in her hand. His blue form shimmered in the dim light, his old Jedi robes whipping around him, caught in an unseen wind.

  
Leia pauses the recorded message and turned her head towards Finn, a smile brightening her face. “That’s my brother, Luke. I honestly had began wondering whether I’d ever see him again.”

  
She lifted her hand to resume the message when the door to her room slide open. They both turned to see a disheveled Poe lunging into the room. He was wearing what had to be the dirtiest flight suit Finn had ever seen, practically black from all the grease and oil covering it. His face was mostly covered by an oily smear.

  
_Must’ve been working on Black One again,_ Finn thought as Poe closed the distance between them.

  
“General, your message-” Poe began, but was cut of my Leia’s raised hand.

  
“I received another message from Luke,” she began, hope and renewed determination in her eyes. “He’s found something, he didn’t explain it well, it being some sort of Force Well? The problem is, he believes that if he’s located the source, then Snoke must have as well. He need us to deploy to an uncharted planet in the outer rim, and help defend whatever it is that needs protecting. Luke and Rey hope to relocate this source of power and hide it from the First Order.”

  
Leia then moved to hand Finn the still silent hologram. “There’s a message at the end for you, Finn.”

  
Reaching out he carefully took the palm sized receiver in his hand, and started the message up again. Luke’s robes started billowing around him again, but he then stepped out of view. Quickly replacing him was Finn’s friend that he hadn’t seen for a long time; Rey.

  
“Hello Finn. I hope you’ve recovered fully in the time that I’ve been gone. It’s been a long while, so you should’ve had the chance… I remember leaving you with Poe Dameron before I left to find Master Skywalker, I hope he kept his promise, or else he’ll have to answer to me.”

  
Finn looked up at Poe confused, to which the pilot just let out a laugh and shook his head.

  
“I just want to thank you,” Rey continued, “for trying to protect me from Kylo Ren. You nearly died when you did that, so I just want you to know that it wasn’t for nothing. We will bring him, and the rest of the First Order down. I promise you that, Finn.”

  
She opened her mouth as if she wanted to continue, but then decided against it. She nodded stiffly once then the hologram cut out.

  
Finn felt himself grinning like a fool. It had been over a year since he had seen his friend and he was almost giddy from the fact that she was alive and well and thinking about him despite the fact that they were about to battle the First Order for some mysterious sacred Jedi artifact.

  
Finn looked up at Poe again, who surprisingly had a look of mild concern on his face. He turned to the General quickly. “When do we need to leave?” Poe asked.

  
_Ah_ , Finn realized, _he must be concerned about the upcoming battle._

  
“As soon as we can,” Leia replied, grabbing a holopad and typing rapidly on it. “I’m sending you the coordinates Luke sent. Call together the rest of the pilots and figure out when is the soonest we can leave and arrive there. Let me know as soon as possible and we’ll figure it out from there. Once you two leave to prepare your men I’ll alert the other leaders to do the same. But remember Commander Dameron, we will all be waiting on your word for the timing. Make sure all your ships are ready to fight if needed.”

  
Poe smirked. “You can count on me General,”

  
He nodded sharply at her before turning to Finn, “I’ll see you soon, don’t leave without me Big Deal,” Poe leaned in and kissed him briefly, but still managing to convey his concern and need. “Love ya, Finn.”

  
“Love you too, Poe,” Finn responded, somehow breathless even after such a small moment. “I’ll be waiting for you.”

  
His pilot smiled at him before leaving the room and jogging down the hall and out of sight. Finn glanced back at Leia, who was still looking at the spot where Poe had disappeared.

  
“You had better prepare your troops as well, Finn,” she said softly. “I really have no idea what my brother has gotten us into, but i think this might be the fight that just might decide the outcome of this whole war.”

  
Finn shivered at her ominous words. He quickly dismissed himself to go and prepare for their departure, pulling out his holopad and sending out a message to all his troops to meet immediately. As he jogged down the deserted hallways, he hoped Rey’s words were true, and that they would finally bring the First Order to its end.

  
*************

  
Phasma kept her temper in check as Kylo Ren continued his silence while they waited for the man to tell them why they had been summoned after his council with the Supreme Leader. Her and General Hux exchanged another glance, as he too was in the dark on what caused Ren’s current dark mood. The fact that the Supreme Leader had to be contacted in response to this mystery concerned Phasma even more. Ren didn’t like to ask for council from their leader, and now his face showed nothing but anger and worry.

  
“Well, Ren, what is it?” Hux asked sharply, breaking the tense silence.

  
Ren looked at him, Phasma could see the contempt in his eyes for the General. Then he turned to Phasma, with less contempt and more seriousness.

  
“We need to prepare,” Ren began slowly, choosing his every word. “For all out war. Skywalker has reappeared from his exile, and is seeking out an ancient weapon that the Supreme Leader has long sought after.”

  
“What sort of weapon-” the General began before being silence with another one of Ren’s glares.

  
“That is none of your concern, General.The Supreme Leader will be sending to you a set of coordinates that we will need to send the entire fleet to immediately. We had reason to believe Skywalker may already be there, with the rest of the resistance as well.”

  
Ren turned to Phasma again. “Are your Stormtroopers prepared for this?”

  
She nodded once. “If it’s war with what’s left of the Resistance, my troopers are prepared to finally end them.”

  
Kylo nodded only slightly in response. Phasma noticed that under his usual mask of rage, the darkside user looked unwell, almost sick. Was this war finally getting to him? Was his constant struggle to suppress the light within him finally making him crack?

  
Phasma stood still and revealed nothing of her thoughts as Ren barked more orders at Hux before stalking away. She watched as the General began growling to himself as he followed Ren out of their meeting room. These two were giving her doubts if they could keep themselves in their place of power, thus keeping her in a role of power in question as well. She could only hope that in this coming battle she would be able to better her position within the First Order ranks if these were the kind of men that were put in command.

  
As she walked out of the room to begin preparations for battle, she smiled darkly under her chrome helmet. _If what Ren said was true,_ she thought, _then the entirety of the Resistance will be there to face us. FN-2187 will finally receive his punishment at defying the First Order, and defying me._

_  
Of course, I’ll need to find a way to make sure he truly hurts at my hands…_


	10. Chapter 10

He knew he shouldn’t be excited, Finn thought as he toyed with the thin band of rounded metal between his fingers. The risk of his death and the death of everyone sitting in the cramped cargo hold around him was all too real. But he couldn’t help it, this could be the end of the war, the end to all the fighting and misery in the galaxy. 

 

_ And I’ll see Rey soon too _ . Finn smiled to himself at the thought of his friend. He had so much to tell her! He secretly hoped that she would be proud of him for all he’s done for the Resistance, and more importantly, for his engagement to Poe. 

 

Finn shook his head and replaced his ring onto his finger.  _ She probably won’t even believe I’m planning on getting married! Kriff, I can barely believe it!  _

 

Finn let his mind wander as the ship he was on smoothly traveled through a Hyperspace lane towards their mysterious destination. It was surprisingly quiet in the cargo bay, seeing as his entire pathfinder team was stuffed into the small ship shoulder to shoulder. The men and women were mostly silent, occasionally speaking to each other in hushed undertones. There was a near silent excitement building in anticipation of the battle to come, and none of them wanted to admit their giddiness at the chance to fight against the First Order in the open once again. 

 

Unable to continue sitting there, Finn rose from his seat and exited the cargo hold to the front of the ship were the pilot and gunner were checking coordinates and communications on their console computer screen. 

 

“Commander Finn,” the pilot to his left greeted him with a sharp nod. “We shouldn’t be more than ten minutes out. Sorry for the long journey, but Commander Dameron insisted we take the long way to avoid any First Order entanglements.”

 

Finn smiled at the mention of Poe. “Yeah, that sounds like Dameron alright. Any intel on the planet itself yet?”

 

The pilot shook his head. “Not much. What information we have from the archives makes it seem like there shouldn’t be any planet at all out here. But our long range scanners indicate that there is. Someone, a long time ago, wanted to keep this place hidden.”

 

Finn eyed the computer screen as it counted down the minutes they had left in Hyperspace. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest as they hurtled towards their destination. He had no idea what they would find when they finally dropped out of Hyperspace;  _ would Skywalker and Rey be there? Would they be alone? Or would the First Order be laying in wait for their arrival to blast them out of the sky without warning… _

 

Finn took a deep breath to steady himself. This is the kind of thing everyone in the Resistance has been trying to prepare for. Poe and his top pilots left just before Finn and his team in order to attempt to find out more about the geography of the planet, possibly clear the atmosphere around the planet of any enemies, or at least scatter them so the arriving ships could make a quick exit if they needed too.  _ That future husband of mine has tried to think of every possibility _ , Finn thought, always impressed with how meticulous Poe could be when it was needed. 

 

“One minute out,” the pilot said, bringing Finn back to the cockpit and away from his thoughts of Poe. Finn braced himself for whatever might appear in the ship’s viewport any second now. His fingers dug into the co-pilots seat in front of him.

 

The stars quickly snapped back into place as the ship stopped its hyperspace travel and returned to real space. Everyone seemed to be holding their breath as they search the atmosphere above the small, orange and green planet below them. 

 

The ships comms suddenly crackled, “Ship Tibertian, good to see see ya in one piece,”

 

Finn breathed out. No mistaking it, that was Poe’s voice. There seemed to be a hint of stress in it, but he was clearly calm. The had beat the First Order to this secret planet. Finn would take any advantage they could get over their enemies. 

 

“Commander Dameron,” the pilot replied, “good to see you too. Where would you like us to set down?”

 

“Sending the coordinates over now,” Poe’s said just as their own ships computer lit up with the new information. “It’s a good size hold, but it does have a very tight opening on a cliff side for ships to enter though. Your ship should fit if you take it slow,”

 

“Copy that, Commander.”

 

“And you can tell Commander Finn to stop worrying, we’ve got this area covered and we’re ready to receive the rest of the Resistance,” Poe said, clearly holding back a laugh. 

 

Finn was glad he was behind the pilots so they couldn’t see the blush that was warming his cheeks. Rolling his eyes Finn smiled. “You heard him, let’s get the base scoped out for the General.”

 

Finn did his best to push Poe to the back of his mind as his ship broke the planet’s atmosphere and began its final descent towards the planet. It was an odd landscape, with long jagged expanses of orange rocks and sand, and pockets of short green trees breaking up the orange horizon. They soon came across a long stretch of sharp, tooth-like mountains, their thin peaks seemingly scratching at the dull blue sky. 

 

Even as they slowly flew towards it, Finn could barely make out the tiny slash of a hole in the cliff face where they were supposed to go through and land their ship. He subconsciously ducked down as their ship squeezed through the tight opening and into the dark cavern beyond. Squinting, Finn could see a huge floor of dirty metal, gleaming feebly in the light pouring in from the opening. 

 

As the pilot gently set the ship down, Finn was already back in the cargo hold updating his troopers on the situation. Once the cargo door opened, they were to spread out and check the base for any signs of inhabitants or hostiles. 

 

When the cargo door opened and the loading ramp lowered, all that Finn and his troopers could see was a haze of orange dust in the high, highlighted with streaks of sunlight. Finn took lead and stepped out into the hangar, turning to look left, then right, then peered up towards the ceiling of the cavern, or at least where it should be. Finn could only see endless black above them, which gave him a brief feeling of claustrophobia, as if the mountain above him was waiting to drop down on top of them. 

 

Finn swallowed hard and continued making his was deeper into the hangar, trusting his troopers to spread out and search like he had trained them to do so many times before. Finn himself was following the beam of light that was emitting from his blaster, illuminating the shadows in the large room that the sunlight from outside couldn’t reach. He figured he must’ve walked two hundred yards before he reach a wall that stretched along the backside of the cavern. It seemed to be made from the same dusty metal plates that covered the floor. Finn pointed his light down the length of the wall until he came across a power box of sorts. 

 

Slowly, he opened it up, emitting a small squeal of metal rubbing against metal coming from the hinges. Insides, a few red light flashed on and off, indicating that there was power to the hangar at least, and just needed to be turned on. 

 

Finn spoke quietly into his personal comm to his troopers, “Get ready guys, I’m going to try and get the power going in here. Be ready for anything.”

 

After reading the few instructions written in basic, Finn pressed a large black button, the flipped a hand switch, and immediately the hangar lit up as if the noon sun was shining into the cavern. The light reveal a high ceiling, stalactites hanging down from the top. A group of bat-like creatures screeched as the light turned on, and they attempted to fly higher, finding the shadows around the bases of the stalactites.

 

Finn saw three doors leading out of the hanger, and deeper into the mountain. He quickly separated his troopers into four groups, leaving one behind with their ship, the other three slowly disappearing into the doors beyond the hangar. 

 

**********************

 

After about an hour, Finn was able to finally give Poe the all clear-the hidden base in the Mountain was incredibly strange, but hid no enemies.  _ I wonder what Poe will think of that giant waterfall in the middle of the mountain _ , Finn thought to himself as he tried to make sense of the ancient, yet somehow incredibly advanced electrical system running through the bases rooms. Clearly, no one had stepped foot in here in decades, maybe centuries! But the strange technology and architecture of the bases amazing and slight scared Finn. He had seen a few paintings on the walls, depicting the Jedi and the Sith, so he knew they should be in the right place. 

 

The right place, but still no Rey…

 

“Thanks Finn, the General’s on her way,” Poe replied, relief evident in his tone. 

 

“Stay on alert troopers,” Finn informed his squad over their comms. “Leia’s on her way to us, let’s make sure we stay on our toes until then.”

 

After everyone had given Finn an affirmative answer, he hefted up his blaster and holstered it, deciding to take a deeper look at their new, weird lodgings. 

 

As he walked silently down the dim stone hallways, Finn ran a hand along the walls. The longer he traveled along the corridors, more amazed he became with what he was sensing about the place. Under his fingertips, the smoothed rock seem to almost vibrate with age and power. As inexplicable as it was, it seemed to Finn that the very rock of the mountain held onto knowledge, a knowledge that it wanted to pass on to Finn but couldn’t. He was at a lose with how he could possibly sense all that through touching the walls of a long abandoned base… yet somehow, that was exactly what he was sensing. 

 

Poe always insisted that Finn must be Force-sensitive, seeing how he had kept defying the odds, surviving even the most impossible of situations. Finn adamantly denied this though, legends like Luke Skywalker, and more infamously Kylo Ren, they were the people with the abilities to use the force. 

 

And what was happening to him wasn’t something he was trying to make happen; Finn had no desire to have a weird one sided, uninterpretable conversation with a mountain.  _ Maybe the planet itself is using the Force _ , Finn thought. And no matter how crazy it seemed, it was definitely a more logical explanation than Finn using the Force. 

 

_ This is what they must want to protect, _ Finn thought.  _ This whole base seems to be bursting at the seams with the Force! I don’t know how they would use it, but it makes sense that they’d want to keep it out of the hands of Ren and the First Order.  _

 

“We’ve got the General inbound,” Poe’s voice echoed through Finn’s earpiece without warning, pulling him out of his ponderings. 

 

“Alright team, converge at the hangar, be ready to receive and escort the General,” Finn gave out his orders quickly, realizing that he had traveled much deeper into the maze-like corridors of the base, and needed to get his bearing so he could be where he was needed most when the General arrived. 

 

Finn navigated his way back up through the winding halls with more ease than he would have thought he’d have.  _ Maybe it’s the Force, _ Finn joked to himself, smiling sadly at the sound of Han Solo’s voice now whispering in his memories, “That’s not how the Force works!”

 

Finn was only slightly panting as he reached what he believed to be the main level of the base that he has started exploring. He should be able to make it back to the hanger and ready to greet the General before her ship landed if he kept hustling toward his goal. 

 

“Commander Dameron-“ a voice suddenly shouted out over the comms, breaking the static silence, and instantly turned Finn’s stomach. “Unidentifiable ship just popped up on my radar!”

 

“Engage immediately!” Poe commanded, under his usually cool demeanor Finn could hear worry cracking through. “Do let that fighter follow the General and do not let them jump to Hyperspace!”

 

Finn doubled his speed, needing to rejoin his squad and come up with a plan of attack. “Troopers, everyone check in!” Finn called out over his comm. 

 

“We’re all here Commander,” Mercy responded at once, “we can see the Generals ship heading towards us-“

 

“Roger that Mercy, stay in high alert,” Finn replied into his mic, praying to the stars that this wasn’t the First Order, though who else could it be?

 

As he was about to start up we he thought to be the last steep ramp leading towards the hanger, Finn stopped dead in his tracks with a sudden realization. 

 

“Don’t let the General land,” Finn spoke into his com, only a hoarse whisper escaping him. 

 

“Commander?” Mercy responded, clearly confused at Finns orders. 

 

“Don’t let her land!” He shouted, moving back into action, racing towards his squad, “if she lands then they’ll see the hidden entrance to the hangar!”

 

But as Finn burst through the door to the hangar, he knew it was too late. He could see the outline of a ship approaching the hangar itself, with the sounds of laser cannons blasting behind it, the X-wings engaging their new enemy. 

 

“Don’t let him escape!” Poe pleaded with his team, clearly the same thought had dawned on both men-if the enemy escaped, they would know exactly where to find them. 

 

As General Organa's ship barely cleared the tight entrance, Finn approached the edge of the cliff, looking out into the bright sunlight, searching the skies for Black One and the ship it was pursuing. Finn held a hand to his forehead, trying to block out the sun's white rays as he squinted upwards, eyes trailing the small silhouettes of a handful of ships flying away from his position. There was no way to tell who had found them from this distance, but there was no way that this was a random coincidence. Finn knew that in his heart. 

 

He willed himself to look away from the darting ships high above him, knowing he had to get the General away from the hangar, in case reinforcements were on their way. 

 

Before Finn could finished waiting for the loading ramp to fully lower, General Organa was already briskly pacing down it, hoping off the edge that was still a full two feet from the ground. When work needed to be done, Organa wouldn’t let her age, or a loading ramp, slow her down in the least. 

 

“What’s the current report, Commander?” Leia asked Finn sharply, her eyes darting over a data pad that she held in one hand, the other hand shooting away her personal guard so she could focus her attention on the matter at hand without them worrying over her well being. 

 

“Dameron is still engaged, or at least trying to engage the unknown ship,” Finn quickly replied, keeping up with Leia as she swept through the hangar and began making her way towards the door that lead into base. “We can’t confirm if it’s a First Order ship or not but, I think we can assume they weren’t here just by chance.”

 

“No,” Leia replied gravely, “we don’t usually get off that lucky…”

 

As if on cue, a groan mumbled over Finn’s comm, “Dameron to Finn, the rogue ship got away, jumped to Hyperspace before we were anywhere near close to being in range of hitting him…”

 

Finn tried not to frown at the news, “Copy that Dameron. Start rotating your pilots into shifts, we’ve got a whole base to move here and we need everyone to stay sharp.” 

 

“Copy that,” Poe replied, disappointment still coloring his tone. 

 

Finn turned back to Leia, who was now staring off into the distance, a small frown on her lips. 

 

“I know things didn’t go to plan, as per usually,” Finn began, dropping his eye so he didn’t have to look directly at the General, and see the disappointment he was sure was coming, “We’ve got the base to ourselves for the moment, General, so we might as well make the most of it.”

 

Slowly, Leia’s eyes refocused and turned to Finn. “To ourselves?” Leia asked, her lips turning upwards into a sly grin. “Finn, I assure you we are not alone.”

 

Leia looked back towards the back of the hangar where she had been staring off to just a moment before. Finn followed her gaze, shocked to see a thin figure standing in the doorway leading to the main part of the base. Although she was backlit by the light shining behind her, there was no mistaking the staff she carried, the way she held her shoulder back and her head high, or the three buns that were tied off along the back of her head. 

 

_ Rey _ . 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	11. Chapter 11

“I cannot believe Poe was going to go through all that, just for a proposal!” Rey laughed as she finished listening to Finn describe what his fiancé’s original plan to ask him to marry him was. 

 

Finn joined in her laughter, just as amused as she was. The two of them had been dismissed from Luke and Leia, the twins obviously needing a moment alone after their long separation. So Rey had led Finn to a secluded room in the mysterious base, and here finn had talked for hours, catching Rey up on the years that they had been apart. Finn had tried asking her about where she had been, what she had done, and why they all ended up here of all places. Rey only shook her head and told him that it wasn’t her time to answer those questions yet. 

 

_ She’s been turned into a Jedi, no doubt about that, _ Finn thought as he had shook his head at her cryptic answer. 

 

“Poe loves to put on a good show, but I’m grateful that his impatience won out over his need to show off.” Finn smiled wide, unable to help the action whenever he spoke about his pilot. “He’s one of the best people I know, Rey. You’ll get to see that the more you get to know him.”

 

“There’s no need trying to convince me of that, Finn,” Rey replied. “From everything you’ve told me about him, you still have an excellent taste in friends.”

 

Rey smiled at Finn, genuinely happy for her friend. He was glad that their short friendship had survived the years apart, and he hoped that after this meeting, that they would be able to see each other more often, and that Rey could continue her training while staying with the resistance. Finn was about to ask her about her plans after they had received whatever it was that they had raced her for, when  footsteps could be heard approaching their location. 

 

Finn instinctively reached for his blaster, but Rey held her hand out, stopping him. They turned to look towards the doorway leading into their room, and after a brief moment, Poe stepped through, looking worn out from his long patrol in his X-wing. As he looked up and saw Finn and Rey sitting against the back wall, his crooked smirk lit up his tired face, beaming at the two of them. 

 

“I was wondering where you two had gone to,” Poe said as Finn lifted himself off the floor to walk over to him. “I swear I wasn’t even thinking about where I was going and this, this place somehow lead me to you,”

 

Finn wrapped his arm around his Poe, squeezing him gently. “Yeah this place is weird like that, I tried getting an answer out of Rey, but it turns out she’s become just as mysterious as all the legends say the Jedi tended to be.”

 

Rey rolled her eyes. “I tried explaining to Finn that it’s not my place to tell anyone the secrets of this ancient planet… but in short, this place is a Force-Well, a rare point in the galaxy where the Force is gathered and condensed in unimaginable strength and size.” 

 

Finn looked at Poe, whose face was clearly showing the confusion Finn felt. “Well,” Poe began, “I don’t completely understand, but I get enough of it that we need to keep the First Order away from here.”

 

“Yes,” rey nodded, “Snoke and Kylo Ren must never reach this place, it could cause-”

 

“It could cause the greatest unbalance of the darkside the universe has ever seen,” a voice spoke softly from behind them, cause Finn and Poe to jump in surprise. They turned around and saw the legendary Luke Skywalker standing in the doorway. He had his hands folded  into his sleeves, his face appeared serious at first glance, but Finn could see a playful glint in his eyes. His twin sister, Leia, was standing behind him, shaking her head at her brothers dramatic entrance. 

 

“Master Skywalker,” Poe greeted, holding out a hand to the old Jedi master, “it's good to finally have ya with us. I had been looking for you for a long time before we sent Rey out to get you.” Poe looked at Rey, who had gotten up to stand next to him and Finn, and winked, “Looks like she took as much time to bring you back to us as it did for me to find the map in the first place.”

 

Luke smiled ruefully, “It did take some convincing for me to return to the fight,” Luke glanced at Rey, rolling his eyes and smirking at the scavenger. “But once we discovered that this planet still existed, I knew it was time to reappear before the First Order could use it against the galaxy.”

 

Poe nodded, then turned to the General, “What's the plan then? I don’t see us being able to stop the First Order from landing on an entire planet…”

 

“I’ve already sent for the New Republic’s reinforcements, they should be here tomorrow after gathering together. We can only hope that’s enough time for Luke to disperse the energy welled up within the planet, and then destroy it before the Snoke can get the planet within his reach and use it against us.”

 

Poe cocked his head, “Destroy the planet? How would Snoke-“

 

“Don’t ask,” Leia cut him off. “ Luke spent hours attempting to explain this and I can only barely grasp the concept myself… As Han would say it’s just a bunch of jedi mumbo-jumbo.” Both Leia and Luke smiled sadly at that. 

 

“For now,” Leia continued, “I need you and Finn to rest up and be prepared for a long day tomorrow. There’s no time guarantee on what will happen, but I need you two to be at the top of your game if you’re needed to fight.” 

 

The two men nodded at Leia, both ready to follow her orders knowing she was just as impatient and they were to bring down the First Order. 

 

Finn turned back to Rey. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” He asked, unable to shake the feeling that she would just disappear again. 

 

Rey smiled, “Of course, my master wouldn’t send off his apprentice in the middle of all this fun.”

 

Finn hugged her one last time before Leia gave him directions to a private room for him and Poe to share. Finn took his clearly exhausted fiancés hand and led him from the room, needing a few quiet hours alone with him. As excited as Finn was to see his friend, he knew her and Luke Skywalker’s presence meant that war would soon find them. 

 

He would soon regret how right he was. 

 

As the couple walked through the sloping maze of tunnels, Poe leaned heavily on Finn, only barely paying attention to where they were going.  _ I’m surprised he’s still standing, he’s been awake for over thirty hours now… _

 

“Hey Finn,” Poe said groggily, “since we’ll be close we should stop at the hanger at get BeeBee-Ate. He’ll be upset if he’s left alone there all night.”

 

Finn smiled. “Of course we can go get your droid.”

 

_ “Our droid _ ,” Poe corrected him, stopping in his tracks, “I’m expecting you to adopt him after we’re married.”

 

Finn laughed freely at that. He grabbed his pilot around the waist and pulled him in tight. “Of course,  _ our droid _ ,” Finn kissed Poe’s forehead. “We can’t deny BeeBee from having his two dads, could we?”

 

Poe put his hands on either side of Finn's face as he kissed him deeply. It was usually at the most random time that the two were able to find a minute for themselves, and since those minutes were rare, they always took advantage of them. Finn squeezed Poe tighter to him, needing to feel his pilot close. Finn felt Poe grin wide against his lips. 

 

“Maybe we find our room first,” Poe whispered, then softly pressed his lips against Finns again, unable to wait for an answer. Finn shivered with anticipation as Poe’s hand traveled down from his face to his hips, the pilot’s hand grabbing him tightly. Finn pulled his head away, just slightly, and he began a sly reply when unexpectedly the comms in both the men’s ears suddenly beeped loudly with an emergency signal. 

 

Poe’s hand flew to his comm to turn it on. “What’s going on out there Pava?”

 

“Poe we got TIE Fighters incoming!” Pava’s voice yelled out. “They came from the other side of the mountain range! I count seven on my radar!”

 

“There’s another four coming in from the south!” Another voice rang out. Finn was frozen in shock, they should’ve had more time, more warning!

 

“I’m heading to the hangar now!” Poe responded to his pilot’s as he grabbed Finn's hand and yanked him into a run. 

 

“How did they get here so quick?!” Finn wondered out loud as they raced toward the hangar “our reports indicated they were on the other side of the system!”

 

Poe started to respond when a pilot shouted over the comms, “Everyone in the hangar-brace for impact!” Then before anyone could ask what the pilot meant, the floor below Finn’s feet began to tremor so hard he lost his footing and almost face planted into the stone ground, only barely catching himself with his nose inches away from the floor. 

 

Finn shook his head as he got back onto his feet. Poe was already back up and heading down the hallway. “Come on Finn! They need our help!” Poe cried desperately to him as the pilot skidded to a stop to turn and help Finn up. 

 

“What did they hit us with?” Finn wondered out loud, knowing Poe only knew just as much as he did.  _ What could the First Order use to shake a whole mountain? _

 

Soon voices rang out over their comms, pleading for backup and medics in the hangar. Other members of the resistance joined Finn and Poe and their race to do whatever they could. And when they finally reached the hangar they began to understand the extent of the damage the First Order had done. 

 

It was chaos in the hangar. Finn couldn’t immediately see what happened due to multiple fires around the room and the lighting being knocked out. He was pulled out of his momentary shock when one of his troopers called out to him for help. Finn rushed over to the call, and found Mercer trying to free a pilot from under a fallen piece of stalactite. 

 

The two working together just barely lifted the broken rock off of the pilot for him to pull him out from what was almost his grave. Once the man was clear, Finn and Mercer dropped the debris and immediately began to attempt to tend to his wounds. Finn could immediately see from the deflated look that his legs were most certainly broken, and any attempt to move the pilot would result in tremendous pain for the man. 

 

“Mercer, we need a stretcher,” Finn yelled over the noise that seemed to only be getting louder in the hangar. “Did we find any sort of med bay in this base?”

 

Mercer nodded, “Mercy found a place above us that-“ 

 

The trooper was cut off by a sudden explosion that shook the room and caused a number of more stalactites to fall onto the carnage. 

 

“We’ve got to get everyone out of here,” Finn yelled as he stood up, trying to make out the identities of the people that were running about in the smoky haze. Finn looked down at the injured pilot, who was looking towards the fires that were slowly creeping in their direction. “Mercer, get him out of the hangar, be quick and,” Finn could only shrug, both of them knew they could only do so much for the pilot. 

 

Leaving Mercer to do his job, Finn turned toward to smoke filled section of the hangar. That’s were the most cries of help seemed to be coming from.  _ And I think that’s where Poe headed _ , Finn thought worriedly as he made his way to the nearest voice he could hear. 

 

*********************************************

 

It had been nearly an hour since Finn has first arrived at the hangar, and he was now panicking.

What appeared to happen was three TIE Fighters had kamikazed into the entrance, causing massive damage. The entrance had been completely caved in, and the overhead lighting was out. But Finn could still see the destruction by the many small fires that were still stubbornly buring. Most of the Star crafts inside the hangar had been badly damaged, many destroyed completely.

 

The worst part was after helping as many as he could, Finn couldn’t find Poe. Of course he could be below the hangar in the med bay the Resistance has set up, but why would he have his comms off? The entirety of the hangar was completely unsafe and they had been ordered to evacuate as soon as all victims had been cleared. As far as he could tell, with the exception of the pilot’s still outside the base in their ships, his pilot was the only person unaccounted for. 

 

Finn decided to make one last ditch effort to find Poe. While attempting to pick out a safe path, Finn carefully strode through their latest loss. The smoking hulls of broken ships loomed through the haze. Small fires feebly lit Finns way, throwing dancing shadows on the various stalactites and rubble that had fallen from the caves ceiling. 

 

“Poe?” Finn called out, hoping his pilot would hear him over the still blaring emergency sirens. Finn continued to walk straining to hear anything other than the full roar of the fires and the shrill alarm. 

 

He had been searching for ten minutes, wishing that the cave hangar wasn’t so incredibly large. Poe could be anywhere, hurt or unconscious, and Finn was running out of ideas of how to find him quickly. 

 

Then it hit him.  _ Of course that’s where he is!  _ Finn shook his head at his slowness to realize his pilot’s priorities in a time like this. 

 

Within moments Finn was approaching the spot where Poe had landed Black One, near the mouth of the cave. He soon heard a desperate, broken voice cursing loudly, accompanied by loud metallic bangs and the sounds of rock breaking apart. 

 

Finn quickened his pace and soon saw what was causing the pilot so much pain. He saw his pilot’s beloved X-Wing, the back half of it nearly completely crushed under rubble. Poe was perched on top of the ship, trying to dig through the destruction, mostly likely trying to free the ship. 

 

Finn could already see his efforts were hopeless. The X-Wing was tilted at an unnatural angle, its frame warped and twisted by the weight of the rock. Finns heart broke for Poe’s loss, the ship that had never failed to save the pilot time and time again. 

 

“Poe…” Finn began weakly,  _ how do I tell him he needs to stop? To give up? “ _ Poe! You’ve got to stop!”

 

Finn saw his pilot look down at him when he heard his name called. 

 

“Finn! You’ve got to hurry-I need help!” Poe shouted down at him. 

 

“Poe it’s no use,” Finn weakly argued, barely able to bring himself to disagree with him, knowing how much it would hurt his pilot. “Black One is crushed we can’t get her out..”

 

Poe just shook his head, clearly frustrated with Finn’s reasoning. As Finn opened his mouth to continue his argument, Poe shouted at him, “It’s not Black One,” Finn heard him nearly choke on the words, the pilots pain was audible. “It’s BB-8! He’s stuck inside the ship!”

 

Finns heart sank as he took him the information, the damage to the ship was so severe he couldn't see how the two of them, let alone a whole crew, could get the little droid out safe just using their bare hands. A quick glance to each side that the fires nearest to them were creeping closer, another hazard they would have to deal with sooner rather than later.  _ How are we supposed to save that droid?!  _ Finn thought desperately, trying to formulate a plan that didn’t end with all three of them dead. 

 

As Finn approached the wrecked ship, attempting to find a way up toward Poe, he heard a voice shouting in the distance.  _ Oh no, did we miss someone else trapped out here?  _ Finn spun around, squinting through the smoky haze to find the source of the voice. Within seconds a slight figure was silhouetted in the smoke, running toward the two men. 

 

Finn cocked his head in confusion before he realized who was running full speed at them:  _ it’s Rey!!  _ Immediately Finn had conflicting feels of elation and fear, she might be able to help them save BB-8, but now the two people that mattered most to Finn were rocking their lives in the doomed hangar. Neither Finn, or the Resistance, or the Galaxy, could afford to lose these two lives in here. 

 

“Finn! Poe! What are you still doing in here the whole ceiling could collapse!” Rey yelled at them when she was within range.  Finn saw her pocket her lightsaber, the one she used against Ren, when Finn had an idea. 

 

“Rey, we need your help-“ Finn explained quickly, grabbing her hand and dragging her closer to Poe and the ship. “-BeeBee-Ate is stuck in Black One, you could use your lightsaber to cut the rock away?”

 

Poe, hearing Finns plan, jumped down from the ship, landing hard next to the pair. He straightened up, trying to rub the soot from his face. “Please Rey, can you-“

 

“Stand back,” Rey interrupted, I can help but I need space.”

 

Finn didn’t need telling twice knowing all too well how destructive a lightsaber could be. He dropped Rey’s hand and backed up a few steps, forcing Poe back with him. 

 

The couple watched as Rey stepped close to the X-Wing and reached out with her hand, not quite touching the ship. Finn and Poe looked at each other, both with the same confused look on their faces.  _ What is she doing?  _

 

Then without warning, the huge rocks and shards of debris that had crushed the starship began to float slowly away from it, as if the gravity on the planet was no longer holding them down. Finn took a cautious step back, fearing that he too would be lifted from the floor unexpectedly. Then within seconds Finn realized what was happening;  _ Rey is using the Force! _

 

“Get BeeBee-Ate out now!” Rey instructed them, her voice right with concentration as her outstretched hand quivered with the power it was commanding. Poe didn’t hesitate to bolt for the ship and his droid, and Finns doubt was quickly subdued as he followed behind his pilot. 

 

Once at the ships side Poe immediately opened a partially crushed side panel and began punching in a sequence for the manual overrides to drop BB out of the ship. The second it was unlocked Poe was under the twisted backside of the ship, showing Finn where to pull down to extract his droid. Poe counted down and the two men pulled the plating down, its sides screeching in protest as the metal on metal was forced into contact. Finn though for a moment that it was stuck beyond their strength, but little by little, the paneling pulled away, and the white and orange spherical droid was ungracefully dropped out of its hold. 

 

“BeeBee?!” Poe shouted as he dropped down to his knees, straightening the droids dome head. The droid realigned itself as it beeped and booped in an annoyed type of way. Finn grinned widely seeing that the droid that meant so much to the both of them had survived this attack. Before anyone could say or beep anything else, Rey yelled at them to move out of the way!

 

No sooner than the three of them had cleared away from the ship, the debris Rey had been lift began to fall from the sky back to the ground with loud, shaking crashes. When she turned to check on them, Finn could see how tired she was suddenly. Rey’s shoulders shrugged under the exhaustion of what she had just done, her eyes dull and tired. 

 

After quickly inspecting his beloved droid, Poe rushed to hug the girl who had helped save him. “Thank you so much Rey,” Poe said roughly, his own exhaustion and emotions taking over as well. 

 

Finn was happy to see some light return to her eyes as she hugged Poe back. “I couldn’t just leave BB-8 behind after all the times he’s helped  save me.”

 

The little droid beeped out a loud grateful tune before starting to roll away from what was almost its grave. Finn, needing no other convincing took both Poe and Rey by the hands and immediately followed. The sooner they left the hangar the safer he would feel. 

  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
